Did you know?

[2yrsandwaiting]

Hi girls, sorry if this this all over the place, but thats where my emotions are now.
But i was wondering if any of you knew that you would never hold your baby or babies that you lost. Like in your heart, just a nagging little feeling that told you not to get to attached, to guard yourself. I feel terrible saying this, but i think i did. From the second i got my BFP, i was scared and worried all the time, i never allowed myself to feel complete joy, which i should have, because we had been trying for 3 years. i should have been crazy with happiness, and its not that i wasn't, because i was it was just different there was just always something holding me back. Am i crazy or is has anyone else felt this way. I remember with my DD, just being happy all the time and not worried at all, but this time was completely different.

Thanks for listen.

 

[x_Rainbow_x]

i new with 3 of my pregnancys they would end badly but i had no clue with the 4th..

 

[Omi]

I had no clue with the first one..i guess i was blissfully optimistic and not really expecting anything..but the second one i started to have niggling feelings 2 weeks in, after i got the bfp.

Id like to clarify that it wasnt so much the fear the second time around but rather that i had that sub concious feeling that something was very wrong- and indeed it was

I know i'll have a baby one day (soon i hope, lol) but i also have to admit i cannot imagine myself with a bump as i have been pg twice so i know that feeling..but ive never gotten past 8 weeks..

a bump and a baby would be very nice

 

[Eoz]

My 1st I was over the moon and was told to hold back but I had no fears at all.My 2nd I was a bit sceptical as I had lost one baby before fallin pregnant.Then I had went on to have another 5 m/c's so when I fell pregnant with my 3rd I was ignorant ,I didn't pay any attention to it at all till I got to 14 weeks then I started to feel better,but as with all of my pregnancys the slightest twinge I panicked then I suffered another 2 m/c's and again when I fell with my 4th I was trying not to think about it.but that wasn't easy as I bled at 9 weeks and went on for a scan to be told it was twins and I had lost one baby.So I had to have reg scans till I was 20 weeks..I think it all boils down to expierience but I learnt not to get attached so easily.well untill I had the all clear!

Wishing you all the best xx

 

[becky77]

Yeh i just had a feeling something was going to go wrong right from the start i kept saying to my sister something is wrong, of course we all put it down to just 1st tri jitters ,but i new.
must have been mothers instinct
x

 

[Orange lady]

Hi there
Yes I knew too. When I first got my I was really pleased and felt really really well. 3 weeks passed and I started to feel unwell. No specific symptoms but not wanting to do anything and my mood was like I was under a black cloud. The day of my scan, I didn't want to go in. I had a terrible feeling. We got there and baby had died. I just knew it. It's only afterward that you realise you should have trusted your own instincts.

 

[bklove]

It is really hard to get attached and not worry after previous mc, but at some point its gotta be ok for us 2.

 

[susan_1981]

I was completely like that. I never connected with my pregnancy and when I got my BFP, I didn't feel excited like I should have done. I felt constantly paranoid and worried. And I could never imagine giving birth, let alone hold, the baby. I wonder if it's your body's way of letting you know? I don't suppose we'll ever know for certain but I can see myself with children in the future, I just couldn't with that one. Also, every time someone said something like "let me see the pictures of your scan when you get back", I kept feeling like saying "that's if everything's ok". Or if people said "when you are going to buy baby clothes", I'd say not for ages because I didn't want to jinx anything.

I hope next time I'm pregnant, it's a care free happy experience x

 

[who's_mummy]

I had a feeling something wasn't right but I put it down to thinking I'd been too lucky for too long with having my three children with no complications.

Gemma x

 

[haaza123]

With my four mc's something didnt feel right. It was like my mind was telling me that something would happen. Before my first mc, i was telling my friend and talking slightly negative and not realising myself. She brought it to my attention.

With this pregnancy i've been having negative thoughts but i think this maybe becasue the doctors started me off with negative thoughts.

to you
xxx

 

[Ivoryapril]

I had a feeling from around New Year that something wasn't the same and i think i started to 'switch off' a bit with the pregnancy, not thinking/talking about it as much and getting excited. Turns out i miscarried just before Christmas but my body didn't realise. I so hope that next time i will be able to relax. I suppose i will have to as the reality is that there's nothing we can do, if it's going to happen it's going to happen and worrying won't change anything. x

 

[vickielm]

I can totally agree that everyone felt different so to speak.

I got my BFP on 6th Dec and when i got it it did not feel real even though the pregnancy was planned. If it was not then i would have put the feelings down to being overwhelmed.

I was forever texting my BF and saying it just did not feel real. We decided to tell close family,which led to close friends then every one was so happy for us. Everyone found out / knew but we were not bothered, just so happy, but even telling people never helped the wierd feeling that it was not happening.

I told management at work as my job involves lifting etc and they were so excited for us, but asked why i was saying "if everything turns out ok". I dont know i just could not get excited (same with OH) OH said that it will come in time and we will be a happy family.

Then when i MMC in Dec and had the D+C in Jan i had the maximum support from everyone and i am glad that they were there or i think i would have locked myself away even more, but instead i was able to talk to people about my feelings, fears etc. Work was very understanding and in total i have 4 weeks off work (mainly waiting for scans and because i could not say how far i was they initially thought that they could not see the twins heart beats we waited a bit longer then again for a second opinion). So it was great to have the support there when i needed it.

I had told people to try and make the pregnancy feel more real and it did for a short while until the bad news.

Next time i am not sure whether we will tell people as soon as we did this time. I think we will just see how it goes.

Alot of people say wait until the 12 week scan to see if everything is ok before broadcasting your happy news, but still after that things can go wrong.

I suppose everyone feels different about when to tell people.

Vik

 

[Widger]

I had no idea with mine. I think it is natural to feel worried and probably even more so now.

First time was an early miscarriage so bleeding happened very quickly after my af was due. Second time I was trying to be positive and really did think it was it this time.... only to be disappointed when went in for scan at over 8 weeks. That is life I suppose.

 

[loz]

with my first pregnancy i did not worry once but my second pregnancy was totally diff was not worried but i kept thinking about when baby was born and i just couldnt imagine it, i kept constantly saying to oh do u think there will be a baby at the end of this? so i guess i just new it was not meant to be, i lost the baby at 18 weeks. this pregnancy i can imagine having the baby so i hope this one is fine. x

 

[JASMAK]

My 1st m/c...I full on expected to hold my baby. I had never had a m/c before, and I was a ways into my pregnancy. The second one, no, I didn't. The third, I did but I was very nervous.