Disaplin/punishment/rewards

[Miss_Bump]

So then what would happen when you're somewhere (ie.a friends/relatives house or shop etc) that she's not allowed to have everything in sight!? What do you do then?

Good question.

I usually let Evie have a look at whatever she is curious about and tell her what it is and what it does and let her touch it etc then she will either get bored or I'll distract her with something 'toddler friendky' and usually that's enough to satisfy her curiosity... For a while lol

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

I can't speak for others, but for us, I just find Ruby responds very well to being asked not to play with x y or z at a friends house, with an explanation. In shops, same. Obviously though I'd try not to have her walking in a glassware department She knows she can look at the things but not touch them, otherwise they might break and mummy will have to buy them, and mummy doesn't want to buy them.

 

[Kalah]

Yes they definitely are impulsive! I'm forever having to explain to OH that if he doesn't want Kili to get something he has to actually hide it, not just put it out of her reach. He seems to think she's old enough to learn not to get something if he says no enough times just because no does work sometimes. I've realized life is just easier if everything she can see in a room she's allowed to have!

So then what would happen when you're somewhere (ie.a friends/relatives house or shop etc) that she's not allowed to have everything in sight!? What do you do then?[/QUOTE]

Well I let her have pretty much anything she wants, there are very few things she isn't allowed to play with. At someone elses house I would just follow right next to her and play "with" her to make sure she doesn't hurt herself or break anything.

 

[muddles]

I sign 'don't touch' to him and say 'no, don't touch' and he now often signs it back to me when he is about to do something he shouldn't the little monkey!

I am not really into punishment/reward thing as I don't want him to grow up thinking that he will only do something if he gets something, but have nothing against people who it works well for as it's always nice to see well behaved children rather than little tearaways.

I will tell him no, am consistent, so if I say no then I mean it however many times I need to tell him that, and he is already learning that tantrums don't get your own way! For instance he was having a major strop yesterday because I was trying to peel potatoes for dinner and he wanted to be picked up. I tried to distract him by giving him a pan and a wooden spoon and told him I'd pick him up in when I was done. He started having a tantrum so I repeated what I had said then when that didn't work I moved him through to the lounge (I can see into the lounge from the kitchen) and by the time I had walked back to the kitchen he was toddling off to look out the window. I then picked him up for a cuddle soon as I was done, just like I said I would. He seems to understand a lot more than I was giving him credit for.

I think as long as you are consistent in what ever approach you decide then you will get along just fine.

Edited to add- having read through other people's responses I would like to add that Oliver is like a lot of the other children mentioned here that don't hear 'no' a lot. It is only used if necessary. He knows he can touch/play with or go anywhere he can get to in the house (obv we follow if he goes out of sight) but that sometimes he is only allowed to look. For instance we have one of those digital photo frames and he isn't allowed to touch that (as it's a nightmare to get finger prints off ) but he knows if he points and makes noises at it then it will be switched on and he can look at the pics and he doesn't even try to touch it now.

At other people's houses I always make sure I have a couple of toys and a book in my bag for him and if he goes to touch things he shouldn't he will keep getting told 'don't touch' until he gives up (it may take quite a number of repetitions but he will give up before I do )