Disco Derail! - TTCAL/PAL Discussion and Support!

[Sassy_TTC]

I have some one to help me, either mil, sil, etc, Danny's been given dependent leave with work so he can come and go as he pleases but he's got such a lot on that's he's having to go in most days! Yesterday I was alone until 3pm, Danny made Poppy's lunch and mine abs left everything in the living room for me, I laid on the sofa while she played, watched tv etc! I only got up to change her nappy or put her down for a nap, it's really difficult!

I feel soooooo guilty on poppy, I've not been able to take her up any groups, play dates, swimming or soft play for ages, poor baby
Danny hit mothercare yesterday and bought her silly amounts of new toys so she won't get bored, bless him.x

 

[LucyJ]

Ok going to attempt a post steve has done an update on the ipad and its been playing up so have been reading but not posting anything longer than a few sentences as it seems to have a nerves breakdown but fingers crossed its sorted.

Allie we had a lovely walk thank you we went along the seafront and took Benjamin onto the beach for the first time he coped much better with it than when we put him on grass which he did not like.

Nato that sounds great he wont brake any hearts may steal a few though especially with that smile of his My parents are in west sussex we get the train into waterloo and then tube where ever we need to.

Nato and Allie I would say just go at your own and babies pace with the weening and trust yourself. I got really stressed our about weening after talking to the health visitor I ended up ignorning what she said and doing what I felt was right (with a bit of help from my mum) and things have been much easier. I went slow to start with introducing different flavours slowly then combing them I didnt introduce meat or dairy untill after 7 months. We did have a bit of a blip before easter were he was refusing food I think it was because the food was to bland as over easter we tried him with the food my mum was cooking and he loved it, so now I try where possible to have him eat with us. Ive stopped freezing massive batches now as I have a brain like a sieve and forget to take stuff out. I offer him finger food. Good luck.

Amanda baby hearty is beautiful love all the pictures.

Round you look fab gorgeous bump.

Sassy sorry to hear you've had a scare but glad all is ok rest up which cant be easy with a 10 month old, is danny at home with you? Hopefully the next few weeks will go quickly for you.

Hoping thats really interesting about having a reading done and her seeing more children I had my palm read when I was at uni and she said I would have 3 children 2 boys and a girl! Im sorry things are difficult with your sister must be so hard for your family

Megg love the video

Vicky your sil amazes me just dont get her why wouldnt you take the advice she is crazy. I remember having a talk about bf at my antenatal group and they kept on saying the mum & baby have to learn its not just going to happen straight away.

Benjamin had an eye appointment on mon which was a follow up he had one at about 4 months and he did really well. She is pleased with him and has no concerns about his eyes now but due to a family history he'll be seen again at just over 2 yrs old. I also got him weighed and he his now 15lb 2oz. I got told by a hv that he wont sleep through the night untill he's over 16lbs apparatently thats the magic number for being able to sustain themselves through the night it'll be interesting to see if when he hits 16lbs he started sleeping through I wont hold my breath though

 

[Allie84]

Hey girls,

I haven't read back yet but I just had to share this. It makes me sick. Warning, it's disturbing:

https://news.yahoo.com/nurse-accused-baby-abduction-had-miscarried-194810125.html

I just can't even imagine. I can't even imagine sitting there, dying, as your baby is taken away from you.

 

[Allie84]

Allie, ach i didnt know you'd been through similar either. my bits dont feel the same, they don't look the same. Crikey the pain relief didnt work? Mine failed at about 30 hours for 4 hours and it was absolutely horrific because of the drip and Eloise being back to back. I know the idea of it all happening again is terrifying - i think 'wow i cant believe i actually did that' and the thought of it again is scary. Just don't worry about it for now. I guess if / when you decide to try again, discussing the pain relief options and why it didn't work will be the most important thing. I eventually had to have a spinal block, which is what they give for a c-section as my epidural failed....if you have that then you can still give birth the usual way but the lack of feeling is why i had to have forceps...even though i could feel the contractions. What i'm saying in a round about way is that you can have the c-section pain relief without a c-section.

Yep, Alistair was also back to back AND I was on the drip (pitocin) AND I was given three failed narcotics which for some reason provided zero pain relief either but rendered me completely useless (I could barely speak or stay conscious...I would wake up in horrific pain through a contraction and then basically pass out). The epidural failed AND the spinal block failed. The spinal block is why I ended up with a spinal headache. Eventually, a different anesthesiologist got me a working epdural (at 9 cms dialated) but I still pushed for four hours and that's why I had the vacuum...he just didn't want to come out, even after four hours of pushing. I shudder remembering the birth!

 

[hoping:)]

Lucy- I’m glad you are able to post again. I hope your reading comes true and you get another boy and a little girl! Job well done to Ben passing his eye exam & very interesting about the 16 pound rule… Penny has to be that weight by now and she has been doing a better job at STTN. Thank you for your concern about my sister. We love her & hopefully she will snap out of it soon.

Allie- I feel better knowing your doc told you aspirating wasn’t unusual. Your birth was certainly traumatic and I really hope the next time is a lot easier on you. I would be worried too but with Penny I had unique circumstances that are unlikely to repeat. If I was told that with the next one I would have to for sure endure a 28 hour labor again I would be terrified! Even though I was completely against an epidural I caved at 23/24 hours and it was complete heaven… I can’t imagine it not working. I had a 2nd degree tear & pushed for 20 minutes so my heart really goes out to you. You are a real trooper (As well as Nato)! The next one better just fall out after what you went through for Alistair!

Megg- I am so happy you got to meet your obsession and have an actual conversation!!! Good for you getting it on video

Vicky- funny about Hero eating way too much sand. You SIL does sound a bit looney… I feel bad for her child who has to grow up with such a crazy mother.

Round- I think you look fantastic!

Sassy- I’m glad they were able to stop the contractions but bed rest with an active toddler is no fun. I hope these next 3 weeks fly by.

Nato- good luck getting the meds! I can’t wait for you to make another adorable baby I also found that website very useful. I've been trying to find a good baby food app but have yet to encounter one

Hearty- great news about your appointment. You little girl is such a cutie already! Thank you for sharing

In regards to weaning… I am also nervous about this. Tim thinks it is silly since I am a nutrition major but it feels completely different when dealing with your own baby. Most of my studies were also focused on toddlers-adults so thinking about a baby’s diet makes me a little uneasy since they are so little and I want the best for Penny. I fed her organic rice cereal a few times this month but she isn't quite ready. My plan is to start her again on the cereal at 6 months for a week and then start introducing green veggies first. I read that is it better to start with veggies so that baby doesn’t get used to sweet things first. I like Lucy’s advice on doing what feels right for you and baby. For the 1st year we plan to keep Penny vegetarian and then give her meat if she wants it later. Formula and breast milk is suppose to have enough iron & protein so introducing meat before the 1st year isn’t a huge deal. We plan to give her things like tofu, lentils, beans, green leafy veggies, whole grains etc… to help supplement her protein intake.

 

[LucyJ]

Sounds like a good plan hoping with the weening I introduced veggies first as well he did prefer the sweeter ones like parsnip and sweet potato but will eat broccoli has had leeks. The only veggie so far that hes really refused is peas. He really enjoys fish with carrot and potato and I have to say is like his dad and enjoys meat spag bol being a favourite. I got myself quite stressed about weening there is so much information about and some people are quite forceful about it and whether to do baby led (it wasnt for me) or traditional, I like to think we are doing a combination as he has purees although Im starting to make it abit courser now but I offer him finger food but I got rudely told there is no such thing you either do baby led or traditional weening. Whatever we're doing it works for us. I do worry about varity trying to right down weekly plans for food so I can see what he's having it is a lot to think about it.

I hope things get better with your sister my elder brother went through a really rough patch drinking, taking drugs, he stole from my parents and who knows what else he was getting up to he certanily got arrested once if not more my parents sadly had to throw him out of the house at 17 when he flipped out and attacked my younger brother who was 10 at the time very scary but he sorted himself out it took time but he got there. Now at 36 he is married with 2 children holds down a full time job I think the first job that hes not been sacked from. He had a lot of love and support and eventually reaslised he needed to sort himself out it took time but he got there. I know he has a lot of guilt over how he behaved and what he put our family through but he has done his best to make ammeds. I hope she sees the light and can find a way through it.

It would be lovely to have more children it would be great to have a little girl as well. The deal steve and I have is if we have a girl next time then thats it but if we were to have another little boy (which I'd be thrilled with) then we can have one more but he did say if we ended up with 3 boys that would it no more

Allie I read that article you posted how scary I cant begin to imagine that poor women just thank goodness they got the baby back safe. So scary.

You and Nato are very brave women ow is all I can say. I had the spianl block with my c-section it did work but it took them nearly half an hr to get it in the right place once it was in it worked instantly luckily the headache I had after didnt last long but know you had a rough time with it hope next time its nice and simple for you. Im hoping that next time round I can do it naturally and with out any drama.

Happy 1st Birthday to Luca wow that year has gone by quickly Cesca hope you are having a fantastic day with your little boy

Spoiler

Some pic's of my little man being very clever: one of him playing I'd left him on his tummy and found him like this I went to check on him as I could hear banging and the other one is from this morning put him in his cot on his back while I got changed and this is how I found him looking very proud of himself. I have now lowered the cot!!

 

[Jaymes]

With my first I was in pitocin induced labor for 48 hours, the first 24 I tried without pain relief, but after the nurse checked me and sadly told me I was still less than 1 cm dilated, I caved and got an epidural! It worked in as much as it let me relax enough I dilated, but when it came time to push I was on all fours and even kneeling on the back of the bed. So I guess it didn't do the same for me as it does for most women. After 4 hours of pushing they made me give up and go for a c section. I've always regretted not pushing for the vacuum or forceps, but after your stories I'm starting to rethink my regret. Scary!

Allie. I read that story, it was awful!

I've forgotten everything else... I swear yesterday I went for coffe and the barista asked for my name and I actually had to think about it for a split second... They laughed at me.

 

[hoping:)]

Lucy- Thanks! I like to hear other people’s perspectives… it helps to get a 3rd party’s opinion. Your brother sounds very similar to my sister. I really hope she realizes her mistakes like he did and turns her life around.

Do you have a time frame of when you will start trying again?

I love the pictures of Ben! Pretty soon he will be standing on his own and then running circles around you.

Jaymes- gotta love the pregnancy brain! Your first birth sounds a little like mine. They told me at the very beginning that if I didn’t have any interventions it would be like the baby’s head hitting a brick wall. I was stubborn and wanted a natural birth but in the end we had to do it for Penny. I hated the pitocin. I immediately went into back to back contractions so my uterus didn’t have time to relax and my cervix didn’t dilate properly (hence the brick wall.)

Happy 13 weeks!

Allie- I read the story as well. Very sad

 

[Dazed]

Just and update from me... DH's count was GREAT, but 93% were abnormal. Full details are in my journal.

You all are scaring me with the labor horror stories! My niece didn't have a good labor either, so that doesn't help either.

 

[NatoPMT]

No update from Sassy yet? Hope youre doing ok and milo is staying put. I notice you only have 40 days left today, each day is a bonus and gets you closer.

Luce; thanks for the weaning advice. I have 2 days before Eloise is 6 months. Crappity crap. Glad to hear Ben is doing so well. The 16 pounds thing, i didnt know that, hope he remembers to sleep through very soon.

Allie, bloody hell you had a hard time. My epidural failed for about 6 hours and it was absolute hell until they got the block in. I just cant imagine pushing for 4 hours, that happened to my sister and she had to have an emergency c-section. Didn't Alistairs hb drop during that 4 hours? Surely every birth has to be different so theres no predicting what the next will be like, but the back to back thing concerns me. Me, my sister, my sisters children and now eloise have all been back to back so i assume that will happen to me again if i do it again. shudder

what is aspirating?

Hoping:
Most of my studies were also focused on toddlers-adults so thinking about a baby’s diet makes me a little uneasy since they are so little

as you say, the milk provides everything they need so can you think of the weaning up to a year as just practise feeding? dont worry because you arent having to provide nutrition at this stage. I have started trying eloise on solids directly after her milk as i have read advised and she's only taking a couple a tiny spoons now, whereas when i was feeding her prune puree for her constipation before her milk, she was eating loads.

Im going to be feeding eloise lentils and chickpeas too...i think you have to wait to give hoummous cos of the sesame in it, but i can mash chickpeas in the meantime.

oo my chickpea curry is here, gotta finish reply later

 

[vickyd]

chickpeas give me and Hero really bad gas. If anyone is interested.

I just ate meatloaf and potatoes followed by a large pack of crisps and have now started eating my way through my crunchy nut breakfast cereal....No wonder im not loosing weight!!

On the weaning front, hero hated baby cereals but loved fruit purees and veggies. I pretty much follow her lead and give her what she likes. Thankfully she is easily pleased and eats pretty much everything. seriously, apart from baby cereal she eats everything!

 

[vickyd]

double post

 

[hoping:)]

Nato- I hope you don't have back to back labor with the next! It does make everything so much more difficult and after reading you and Allie's birth experience it makes me shudder as well. Another thing that makes it harder is if your water goes 1st. I was hoping my water would break before contractions so that I knew for sure that labor had begun so I was very happy when it happened. Little did I know it is best for your water to stay intact to provide a cushion. My MW said that the contractions are often harder once your water breaks

Also, thanks for talking some sense into me. I knew that formula and breast milk provide primary nutrition in the 1st year but some how my brain did not connect it and I ended up over thinking the whole weaning process The closer we get the more excited I am now. Penny's face just lights up when she sees food so I'm sure we will both have fun with it

Vicky- I don't blame Hero for hating the cereal... it is completely tasteless and has such a weird texture.

 

[NatoPMT]

Crack gives me really bad gas.

An old school friend did an fb status recently that made me titter about her baby:

"Think the lentil curry i made was too hardcore for Sadie, shes crying and farting in her sleep"

I got crunchy nut cornflakes for ease when eloise was born, now i cant give them up even though i know they are crap. I add almonds to try and make them less like pure sugar but i cant go back to porridge - its like im trapped.

Cracky Nut Cornflakes.

Crack crack crack

jaymes, no point in birth regrets i reckons, whats happened has happened. But your comments made me wonder if i have the same situation again, would i have forceps? i assume a c-section is harder to recover from, but 6 months on when my fufu is still damaged i am pretty sure a c-section scar would be healed. why cant they be tickled out by feathers.

Hoping, i never knew that! My waters went at 4.30am on the Friday morning and it was HORRIBLE. Every time i contracted they seeped out and made me retch. I was in a constant puddle for the next 30 hours. I didnt realise the pain was worse. I am more hardcore than i thought. Back to back, no relief at all for the 1st 18 hours, then no epidural for 6 hours of major contractions with no other relief at all, no waters and a drip of 90 oxytocin.

who wants an arm wrestle.

I was wondering if your training was making you over think it. That happens to me too. Eloise squeaks with glee when she sees her little pink bowl. Even if she only has 2 spoonfuls. It must be so exciting for them to have something so new and tasty after just milk. They are so cute.

 

[hoping:)]

"Think the lentil curry i made was too hardcore for Sadie, shes crying and farting in her sleep"
.

I'm sorry but I couldn't help but LOL at this actually I am still laughing... maybe I am delirious from lack of sleep (Penny decided she wanted to get up at 5:30 am)

My waters went at about 11:30pm. I tried sleeping but with the constant gush of fluid and contractions made it hard. It felt like I was constantly peeing. Plus my mind was already going nuts because I was actually going to finally meet my baby. You are definitely a trooper for putting up with back to back AND no cushion!

 

[Jaymes]

Honestly, For me, c-sections are not too bad, I'm up and walking usually the same day and pretty well healed if not loads weaker for a while about 2 weeks later. No major damage that I can tell. Not saying c is the way to go, but as I've nothing really (besides my horrid first experience) to compare it to I can say its not too bad. I will get some reconstructive surgery to fix some muscle damage and to take away this constant pooch that I've never been able to exercise off. The muscle damage wasn't related to the surgery, but the pooch is.

 

[hoping:)]

Jaymes- pregnancy can even cause your stomach muscles to separate. Sometimes it can be fixed with exercise but other times surgery is needed. I read about the pooch after a c-section as well. Will this kiddo be your last?

Is anyone else suffering from horrible baby brain??? Mine is so bad and it will occasionally cause disagreements with me and DH because he thinks I am not paying attention or forgetting on purpose. I've never had a stellar memory but it is horrible now I will forget what I am saying mid sentence and sometimes words will just fall out of my head. I will even forget the names of family and friends I am driving to the vitamin shop strait after work to pick up some flax seed/fish oil... I can't take it anymore. I feel like I am losing my mind Being pregnant on and off for 3 years probably didn't help my situation.

 

[vickyd]

So ive given in and started controlled crying as of 40 minutes ago...Already a basket case...

 

[Dazed]

Why are you such a basket case Vic?

 

[LucyJ]

Good luck Vicky