Do female only-children rarely have kids?

[Yo_Yo]

It's not so much my age, its my daughter age. Ideally it would be great to have kids close together, but by the time I have everything in order she might be over 5

I had my first at 19, split with her dad at 20, and I met my hubby at 24...now having baby no 3.

For nearly 6 years my daughter was an only child, and now has a little sister she adores. I had resigned myself to the fact she may an only one

The age makes no difference-they have a lovely friendship.

For a long time I thought I'd never have anymore, but now hope to have 5 when finished!

It's not the end of the world if you do have a slightly bigger gap

 

[Pearls18]

I'm sure it's a coincidence. I know how you feel about worrying about these things, I have two gorgeous boys I love to the moon and back but boys seem so much more independent than girls and I worry once they grow up we won't have much contact and I won't have the relationship with grandchildren that maternal grandmothers get, especially when all you ever see is people complaining about their MILs especially on here

 

[sparkle_1979]

I was brought up an only child though I do have siblings I've never lived with and tbh we don't really have a brother sister relationship as I never saw them growing up

I have two girls

 

[teal]

My best friend is an only child and currently pregnant with her third.

 

[daneuse27]

I'm sure it's a coincidence. I know how you feel about worrying about these things, I have two gorgeous boys I love to the moon and back but boys seem so much more independent than girls and I worry once they grow up we won't have much contact and I won't have the relationship with grandchildren that maternal grandmothers get, especially when all you ever see is people complaining about their MILs especially on here

Its interesting you should mention that. I personally have never believed that boys are more independent than girls. However, one of my friends a few weeks ago was talking about a study she heard of about mother-son relationships compared to mother-daughter. Apparently a mother-daughter bond can go on for life, because a mom is irreplaceable. A boy on the other hand, when getting married is expected to put his wife first and foremost, so it takes the place of his mom. His loyalty is more with the wife now, so if they disagree on something, he is usually supposed to take his wife's side, because siding with his mother would make him seem as a 'mama's boy' which is a negative label. However, there's no negative label for a daughter's strong bond with her father- so its a bit of a double standard. I think this may be rooted in why so many ladies don't like their MIL's. I've always wondered about it too. It could also be that if men had a very dominant mother, they're sometimes more likely to gravitate to strong-willed women, which means the two are similar in personality and more likely to butt heads.

 

[Pearls18]

I'm sure it's a coincidence. I know how you feel about worrying about these things, I have two gorgeous boys I love to the moon and back but boys seem so much more independent than girls and I worry once they grow up we won't have much contact and I won't have the relationship with grandchildren that maternal grandmothers get, especially when all you ever see is people complaining about their MILs especially on here

Its interesting you should mention that. I personally have never believed that boys are more independent than girls. However, one of my friends a few weeks ago was talking about a study she heard of about mother-son relationships compared to mother-daughter. Apparently a mother-daughter bond can go on for life, because a mom is irreplaceable. A boy on the other hand, when getting married is expected to put his wife first and foremost, so it takes the place of his mom. His loyalty is more with the wife now, so if they disagree on something, he is usually supposed to take his wife's side, because siding with his mother would make him seem as a 'mama's boy' which is a negative label. However, there's no negative label for a daughter's strong bond with her father- so its a bit of a double standard. I think this may be rooted in why so many ladies don't like their MIL's. I've always wondered about it too. It could also be that if men had a very dominant mother, they're sometimes more likely to gravitate to strong-willed women, which means the two are similar in personality and more likely to butt heads.

Being a mother to boys has definitely changed my own perspective and perception of my MIL (although she has a daughter too, plus 2 other sons and generally more aloof anyway) but I will be very mindful of how I am with potential daughter in laws, but really hope they are understanding too.

 

[Vickie]

My niece is an only child and has 2 daughters of her own

 

[aimee-lou]

I'm sure it's a coincidence. I know how you feel about worrying about these things, I have two gorgeous boys I love to the moon and back but boys seem so much more independent than girls and I worry once they grow up we won't have much contact and I won't have the relationship with grandchildren that maternal grandmothers get, especially when all you ever see is people complaining about their MILs especially on here

Its interesting you should mention that. I personally have never believed that boys are more independent than girls. However, one of my friends a few weeks ago was talking about a study she heard of about mother-son relationships compared to mother-daughter. Apparently a mother-daughter bond can go on for life, because a mom is irreplaceable. A boy on the other hand, when getting married is expected to put his wife first and foremost, so it takes the place of his mom. His loyalty is more with the wife now, so if they disagree on something, he is usually supposed to take his wife's side, because siding with his mother would make him seem as a 'mama's boy' which is a negative label. However, there's no negative label for a daughter's strong bond with her father- so its a bit of a double standard. I think this may be rooted in why so many ladies don't like their MIL's. I've always wondered about it too. It could also be that if men had a very dominant mother, they're sometimes more likely to gravitate to strong-willed women, which means the two are similar in personality and more likely to butt heads.

I have the opposite told to me. The number of times I've heard 'Oh you'll be looked after well when you're older' because I have 3 boys! I've been told a number of times that the 'MIL' gets more of the grandchildren's time. It's certainly true in our circumstance - we're closer to my MIL, but she also has a daughter (my hubby is the 2nd of 2) and they are very close. She's not pushy or anything, and as such I get on well with her compared to my own mother. I'm not close to mine at all, and never have been. It's never a given that a daughter will grow up close to her mother. I do however miss my Dad every day.

Also, strange thing to bring up in conversation - my ex was the youngest o 3 boys and I always got on well with him Mum and Dad. The brothers came home as regularly as they could (2 older ones were in the military) and text their mum every day. She would cook these massive meals (think this was the secret) and all of them were very respectful and loving. I've kept in touch with the family and now all 3 of the brothers are married, 2 have children and they've all bought houses close to their parents.

 

[Bevziibubble]

I think it's just a coincidence. I know a few female only children who have between 1-3 kids

 

[Pearls18]

I'm sure it's a coincidence. I know how you feel about worrying about these things, I have two gorgeous boys I love to the moon and back but boys seem so much more independent than girls and I worry once they grow up we won't have much contact and I won't have the relationship with grandchildren that maternal grandmothers get, especially when all you ever see is people complaining about their MILs especially on here

Its interesting you should mention that. I personally have never believed that boys are more independent than girls. However, one of my friends a few weeks ago was talking about a study she heard of about mother-son relationships compared to mother-daughter. Apparently a mother-daughter bond can go on for life, because a mom is irreplaceable. A boy on the other hand, when getting married is expected to put his wife first and foremost, so it takes the place of his mom. His loyalty is more with the wife now, so if they disagree on something, he is usually supposed to take his wife's side, because siding with his mother would make him seem as a 'mama's boy' which is a negative label. However, there's no negative label for a daughter's strong bond with her father- so its a bit of a double standard. I think this may be rooted in why so many ladies don't like their MIL's. I've always wondered about it too. It could also be that if men had a very dominant mother, they're sometimes more likely to gravitate to strong-willed women, which means the two are similar in personality and more likely to butt heads.

I have the opposite told to me. The number of times I've heard 'Oh you'll be looked after well when you're older' because I have 3 boys! I've been told a number of times that the 'MIL' gets more of the grandchildren's time. It's certainly true in our circumstance - we're closer to my MIL, but she also has a daughter (my hubby is the 2nd of 2) and they are very close. She's not pushy or anything, and as such I get on well with her compared to my own mother. I'm not close to mine at all, and never have been. It's never a given that a daughter will grow up close to her mother. I do however miss my Dad every day.

Also, strange thing to bring up in conversation - my ex was the youngest o 3 boys and I always got on well with him Mum and Dad. The brothers came home as regularly as they could (2 older ones were in the military) and text their mum every day. She would cook these massive meals (think this was the secret) and all of them were very respectful and loving. I've kept in touch with the family and now all 3 of the brothers are married, 2 have children and they've all bought houses close to their parents.

This is nice to hear, I've been told I will be the queen of the house lol......we shall see, il try and make them not hate me lol.

 

[alicecooper]

I'm an only child and I have 4 kids.

 

[Fascination]

I'm an only child and have two little girls it sounds like your experience is just a coincidence. X

 

[Wriggley]

I'm an only child a have 2 boys and definitely want another

 

[SophiasMummy]

My daughter will likely be my only child for medical reasons. trying to think I don't think I know many women who were only children but the two i know that come to mind one got married at 20 and has two kids now and the other one has a daughter too.

the one that's married I've known for many years since i was about 11 and one of the big things she talked about was wanting children and wanting more than one because she hated being the only child

 

[Jaysmummy]

I'm an only child and have 3 children.

 

[supertabby]

I'm an only child and have two children (I love saying that I've only been able to say that for a week!)

I don't see any biological reason or psychological reason why an only child wouldn't have their own children? I would say it's just coincidence.

You've got plenty of time for more children too - I've just had my second and I'm 10 years older than you. My grandma had her youngest at 43. The average age in UK now for having a first baby is 31 so if you're 27 and have lots of currently childless friends that's probably not unusual. Don't worry too much about age gap either, my oh is 5 years older than his youngest sister and they're really close - they were growing up too. My mum is 10 years older than her youngest sister.

And if your lo is an only child - not the end of the world. I don't feel I missed out not having siblings, I had lots of friends so I wasn't lonely but I'm good at being independent and don't need constant company. When I was a kid the only time I wished for siblings was family days out so my parents started letting me bring a friend along for day trips - I loved that so recommend it with your lo when she's older.

 

[topsy]

I am an only child and only have one My mums an only child and only had me xxx

 

[wilbz]

I'm an only child and have 3 girls

 

[daneuse27]

Very glad to see that my experience is only a coincidence thanks everyone!

 

[TwilightAgain]

I'm an only child and been ridiculously broody since I was 16 - i'm 22 now and still waiting but i'm getting there.