Do I find out Gender at Scan to Brace Myself for Birth?

[zmzerbe]

I am only 7 weeks and some change with baby #2 and I have had several losses, so either way I will be happy if my baby is healthy.

I have a 2 year old son who is the absolute light of our lives and I definitely wouldn't mind having another little boy. This would give him a best friend that he can talk to, get dirty with and they could even share a room so it makes housing options the tiniest bit easier for us.

BUT I realllly want a girl, I have always seen myself with one of each. I feel like I am setting myself up for failure here though. I have always just felt like I am destined to have all boys and will never have the little girl I want.

This pregnancy so far is basically the opposite of my son's, I couldn't eat anything with him and always had heartburn, but never had morning sickness. With this one, I can eat most of anything with a few aversions, but I am constantly nauseous.

DH and I were thinking about keeping things team yellow and surprising ourselves at birth. I have also been trying to convince myself that this baby is a boy so that way if it ends up being a girl, I will be super excited, but if it really is a boy then I will be prepared. I'm trying to determine though if I really want to wait to find out until the baby is born. I will be having these thoughts go through my head the entire pregnancy and it's all I think about, and is actually giving me anxiety.

Do you guys think it would be wise for me to just find out at the anatomy scan? I think that way if it's a girl we will be super excited to say the least, but if it is a boy I will have time to cope and get used to the idea.

 

[lau86]

Personally for me it was much easier to find out at the scan and have that time to prepare. I wouldn't want to be in labour and have the added pressure of wondering what the baby would be. I can understand why people want to wait though. I hope you get your girl

 

[zmzerbe]

Thank you. I guess for me it's not as much of a mental crisis if it's not a girl as some people. It's more the not knowing that's eating away at me.

 

[Misscalais]

For me i found out with my 3rd because i desperately wanted a little girl and i knew i needed some time to come around to the thought of having 3 boys. I won't lie i did cry when i was told boy again. I didn't do it in front of everyone, i got up and went to the toilet and cried in there. It was good to have the rest of my pregnancy to bond with my little guy, who is now 15 months and such a sweetheart.
Im unexpectedly pregnant with our 4th baby and the thought of having a 4th boy is eating me up. We were done with our 3 so I'm finding it really hard to deal with. Im only 7 and a half weeks and tossing up if i will find out or not. Im not sure if i can mentally make it to the end without knowing though lol
Good luck i really hope you have a little girl.

 

[lau86]

I had two boys and now I'm having a girl, I was so sick with this one people kept telling me it would be a girl. Turns out they were right but could also have been a lot of rubbish. So there's that to watch out for if you're team yellow. At least if you know, there's no guessing!
I had gender disappointment with ds2, he is the most beautiful little boy I can't imagine not having him. That sounds so bad to ds1, of course I love them the same but ds2 is such a sweetie.

 

[Buttercup84]

We're staying team yellow with this one (third baby, have 2 girls already) partly because we wanted the surprise just once (found out with the girls) but also because if it's another girl I'd rather it not play on my mind and make me enjoy my pregnancy less thinking of the son we'll never have (this is our last baby) I figure if I just find out at birth I'll be thrilled either way. Depends on your perspective though.

 

[iiTTCii]

I have a little girl and really wanted another girl. We decided to find out so that I could get used to the idea and be prepared. We found out we are having a boy, and I did burst out crying at the scan (I feel horrible for doing this).. But finding out was the best thing for me. It's been 12 weeks since we found out and I'm in love with the idea of having a boy now and I couldn't imagine having a girl. It's weird how your mind and heart adjust.

 

[_jellybean_]

I think it's good to find out at the scan...so you're used to the idea, but some women do better waiting b/c then they feel so happy that lo is here that their gd isn't that bad. Depends on the person, I think. It's a personal decision. I'd rather find out though.