Do you feel it will happn for you?

[Ziggie]

I'm sure this has been asked time and time again, but is it normal to feel like it's never going to happen?

I can't visualise ever being pregnant, or giving birth

We've been trying for quite a few months now (less than 12) and I often feel it's not meant to be.... Is that normal?!

I really want it to though! I think I'd be stupidly excited and bore everyone around me, and I'd want to soak up every little detail about it. Fingers crossed

 

[purplecupcake]

I didn't, and still can't!! I was shocked when I got a positive test. I STILL feel like I'm lying about it. I can't picture having a belly or a baby in my arms. When I had an ultrasound, it was so surreal, I can't possibly have a tiny fetus inside me!

I don't think the unreal feeling will ever go away, haha.

 

[Ziggie]

I didn't, and still can't!! I was shocked when I got a positive test. I STILL feel like I'm lying about it. I can't picture having a belly or a baby in my arms. When I had an ultrasound, it was so surreal, I can't possibly have a tiny fetus inside me!

I don't think the unreal feeling will ever go away, haha.

That's kind of reassuring, I think. Lol

 

[purplecupcake]

I didn't, and still can't!! I was shocked when I got a positive test. I STILL feel like I'm lying about it. I can't picture having a belly or a baby in my arms. When I had an ultrasound, it was so surreal, I can't possibly have a tiny fetus inside me!

I don't think the unreal feeling will ever go away, haha.

That's kind of reassuring, I think. Lol

I thought for sure I would miscarry because it just didn't feel right. I think it's just one of those things you get so worked up about, and then it happens and it's not at all like you expected. Like, before I got married I thought it would feel so different being married. Nope, felt the same!

It'll happen, and when it does, you won't believe it

 

[BeachyFeelin]

I can't really imagine it ever happening for us either...last night I was actually wondering why I'm even on a board chatting about it, like I don't belong here because it will never happen.

But I can't think like that - power of the secret, right? Ugh I just said that...

I was going through a rough time last night, I'm surrounded by pregnant people right now, and just today when I thought I was getting a better attitude about it I logged onto Facebook and first thing I see is...."we're expecting a boy!" (this couples 2nd child)

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!

 

[PrayingLady]

Yeah, I definitely feel that way. Folks are popping up preggo all around me... It kinda hurts. We've been married for two years and not even an oopsie. I absolute feel like it will never happen...

 

[mrshan]

I'm in exactly the same boat, TTC#1 since last July.

I've found that my feelings about it fluctuate throughout the month. Some days I'm excited that we don't have kids yet because we just got married last summer and I'm enjoying our newlywed days together. I'm 33 and DH is 38, so we're not wasting any time getting started, but still like our life as just the two of us.

Other days I'm hopeful and excited and just sure that it's going to happen.

The disappointment so far has been harder to take than I expected. I just always assumed that I'd get pregnant right away and there wouldn't be any stress involved.

I'm at CD18 today, so I'm in my TWW. Fingers crossed!

 

[Joccy]

I, too, feel like it’s not ever going to happen or it’s not meant to be. I’m up and down at any given day. Sometimes I’m happy I haven’t gotten pregnant yet because I’m obese and need to lose weight. But other times (which is most of the time) I’m frustrated/sad/questioningGod because we haven’t gotten pregnant yet. I feel like a failure because my DH really wants kids, and I feel like I can’t provide them.

I just keep trying to tell myself that it will happen in time. I just have to stay patient and keep monitoring my temps and o’s.

 

[Ziggie]

Lots of us the same boat then it's strange isn't it.... But I remember once reading that you can't imagine it happening, anymore than you can imagine losing a leg lol!! Which I guess makes sense.

I do try and think positive, as I think a positive attitude helps. Even if you don't believe it, it still helps!!!

Maybe we need a mantra - IT WILL HAPPEN!

 

[laurabe]

I was trying for just over 2 years and was convinced it just wasnt meant to be for me, i finally got my BFP 4 days before my IVF appointment. I know exactly how you ladies feel I felt like giving up many times. The wait will be worth it in the end

 

[W8ing4Ryan]

Hi ladies.. first time signing up for this site, this is the forum topic that caught my eye immediately because that's definitely how I'm feeling.. i thought making a baby would be a lot easier -- DH and I got married May 2013 and did the NTNP method, but yet thinking it would happen within a few months... i mean i honestly thought isn't that part of the plan? May is coming up soon, it will be a year and still nothing, granted we didn't really officially do the serious-methodical way of tracking my cycle etc... so that's where we are headed now. Yesterday my cousin just broke the news that she's expecting her 4TH!!! Like whaaaat? I am really happy for her, but i feel like now the pressure is even more on from my family.... It's not a race, i know when it's meant to be it's going to be, I do believe it's up to God, but man this really sucks... anyway, thanks for letting me vent here.. haven't really "verbalized" my frustrations with this topic outright, but it feels good to know there is a community that understands what it feels like to be outside looking in when it comes to TTC...

 

[hollydazzles]

Thanks for posting this Ziggie. My hubby gets on me for thinking so negatively. Sometimes I think it will happen and other times I wonder if I'm just not meant to have a child the traditional way.

 

[PeanutWhereRU]

I'm sure this has been asked time and time again, but is it normal to feel like it's never going to happen?

I can't visualise ever being pregnant, or giving birth

We've been trying for quite a few months now (less than 12) and I often feel it's not meant to be.... Is that normal?!

I really want it to though! I think I'd be stupidly excited and bore everyone around me, and I'd want to soak up every little detail about it. Fingers crossed

This is me in a nutshell. I dream of being pregnant but honestly when I wakes up reality smacks me in the face and deep in my heart I think I will be one of those couples where there is something wrong. My hubby and I often discuss other options. It's sad but we are trying to be realistic x

 

[Hayleykins05]

Hey

I've felt like it isn't meant to be for us for a long while, we've had two losses and I still don't believe in my heart of hearts that I will ever be a mum. It's so upsetting that some women can get pregnant so easily yet others have the excruciating task of TTC. My OH always tells me I should think more positively to get a positive result, I think he's right. Most women dread child birth and at this point I welcome it with open arms! I'd give birth tomorrow if I could! I hope everybody gets their soon

Baby dust to you all

 

[DivineDiamond]

Hi ladies! I totally feel like this too, so glad I'm not alone!

We haven't been trying long but I feel that everyone but me is getting pregnant, really frustrating when these people aren't trying and we are? I know it sounds awful, and really I'm pleased for them but I just keep thinking "surely it's our turn!" I've bought a CBFM which does give me hope that we are in control of things a bit more.

I'm excited about being ready for a family but it's just really frustrating when a BFN or AF appears

I don't feel stressed I feel more impatient? It's a hard feeling to describe...

 

[mrshan]

I think it's helpful to talk about what you want, how badly you want it, and what steps you're willing to take to get there.

To better explain, DH and I have already decided that the furthest we're willing to go to get preggers is to get checked out if we haven't gotten a BFP by this fall (after a year TTC on our own), and maybe do clomid or something similar if it's an egg problem. It might change, but so far we've ruled out IVF or other fertility steps.

We'll mourn if it doesn't happen, but we're confident that 1. We don't want to have teenagers when we're in our 60's, 2. We'll be happy together no matter what happens because we're that stupid in love, and 3. We'll have tons of money, travel a lot, and always be able to sleep in on the weekends, so that's a pretty decent silver lining.

The benefit to starting to TTC at our ages (I'm 33 and he's 38) is that we're pretty comfortable in our lives as we are, and we're both pretty selfish. Before I came along, DH had already pretty much come to terms with not having kids of his own since he had never been married before. I'm young enough that he got his hopes up again, but if nothing happens in the next 5 years, I'm not planning to push TTC into my 40's.

I find comfort in having a plan. I still think it'll happen, but I'm prepared to stop trying in the next five years and just have a great life either way.

 

[Twinklie12]

I totally know how you feel! I am naturally a very positive thinking person, and sort of just assumed I would get pregnant easily. You never hear too much about people struggling TTC, or having miscarriages etc. Well I have been truly TTC since August 2013 and I have had two early losses. I should feel positive that I've gotten a BFP twice, but lately I have been down. I am 10 DPO today and another BFN, so I am pretty sure I am out this cycle after GREAT BD timing. So frustrating. This means I've been trying for 8 months... just sounds like more waiting than I ever imagined. BUT... I do think it will happen for me (and you!), just in due time.

Maybe I'll feel better after that first glass of wine once AF comes.

 

[Tink_]

I'm starting to lose hope now In the beginning, I truly believed it would happen but now as every month goes by with a I guess it just gets disheartening. My partner still holds out a lot of hope though.

 

[Tink_]

We'll mourn if it doesn't happen, but we're confident that 1. We don't want to have teenagers when we're in our 60's, 2. We'll be happy together no matter what happens because we're that stupid in love, and 3. We'll have tons of money, travel a lot, and always be able to sleep in on the weekends, so that's a pretty decent silver lining.



I find comfort in having a plan. I still think it'll happen, but I'm prepared to stop trying in the next five years and just have a great life either way.

I think that's a great way to look at it. Thank you for sharing, I took comfort in the way you had achieved a level of acceptance and the way you are able to look at it from both ways.

 

[Joccy]

I know exactly what yall mean when you didn't think it would be this tough getting pregnant. My older sister popped 3 kids out like it was nothing and now the kids are 12, 13, and 14.

Now that I'm trying I'm envious of the fertile myrtle's out there. But on the other hand I'm so glad I didn't have any kids before I married my DH. If I had kids with my exhusband then I would still have ties to him!

Anyways I think it will happen, I just can't visualize it happening.