Do you want to know the sex before birth? Why?

[Angel_blues]

We have been discussing random what if's recently, this one came up and we are at opposite ends. I don't want to know until birth and he insists on knowing. I don't see the benefit at all of knowing to be honest... If it came down to it, he could know if he wanted but I wouldn't want anyone else to. Crazy?

 

[Kitteh_Kat]

I chose to find out because it helped me bond more. I went from referencing her as "baby/it" to calling her by the name we had picked out for a girl. I've always dreamed of having a little girl as well, so if it had been a boy it would have gave me time to adjust before the birth. Also made getting everything ready much easier as well (although we still ended up doing a lot of neutral things anyway so we can re-use for future babies).

There is no right or wrong answer to it, it's all about personal choice. I don't how I would have handled it if hubby and I didn't agree to find out!

 

[Angel_blues]

Well it's though, it would suck if he told someone and they slipped up and told me by accident...

 

[staralfur]

We found out because the first 20 weeks of my pregnancy were, well, shit... it seemed like something fun and exciting to sort of get me focused. I did feel a lot more bonded once I found out she was a girl, and it made everything seem more real.

I don't think having one of you find out while the other doesn't know is a solid plan, honestly. Not slipping up for 20 weeks strikes me as quite unlikely. Knowing that my LO was a girl, I was constantly thinking "she/her" in my head and I would assume it would be super easy to slip up.

 

[cupcake.]

I will definitiely want to find out and so does OH.
I'm just way too impatient and I'd go crazy not knowing. Also I'm not good with surprises, I like to plan ahead be as prepared as possible, so I would definitely find out the sex.

But it is personal choice. I imagine it must be tough being on different pages when it comes to these kind of decisions.
I'm just curious, why don't you want to know?

 

[aidensxmomma]

I found out with my first three kids and plan on finding out for any more that I have. For me, it's easier to bond with the baby once I can call him/her by name, or at the very least can say "him/her". Also, knowing the gender helps me feel more prepared. I like to get more gender-oriented baby things so knowing the gender is definitely helpful with that. lol. And honestly, part of it is that I'm just impatient.

It's all a personal choice though. I hope you and your OH are able to figure out what will be best for you both

 

[disneydarling]

We found out with our daughter, and we definitely will next time too! I loved knowing what we were having, and for me personally it helped me bond with her. I think people who don't find our are really patient!!

 

[Amy2701]

We've found out with both so far. I really didn't want to with our first but DH was desperate so I caved. I'm glad we found out with our second as it made it a lot easier to get organised, especially since we had them so close in age.

Currently 12 weeks with #3 and I'm putting my foot down this time. We have one of each so I see no real point in finding out, plus I really want to experience the surprise of waiting til the baby is born to find out.

 

[Angel_blues]

For me, most of my friends did find out and half of them were told the wrong gender. They bought gender specific and it all went to heck because now it was all wrong... I hate disappointment more then anything, I think that's why I don't want to know

You're right Disney darling it'll be difficult I think in the end worth the wait. We only want one so we will only have one shot!

Good for you amy2701 stand your ground! and congrats I'm jealous!

 

[Autumn leaves]

We've decided not to when it happens. Mutual decision... We like the surprise!!! And the "it's a boy/girl" moment!

 

[sequeena]

We found out with our son as we thought he was dying and we wanted to name him but thankfully he is OK

Next time round I'd like the surprise but my OH would like to know.

 

[Emiloo]

Yes we will be finding out- we are much too impatient to wait and I want to be able to get pink or blue stuff!!

 

[aimee-lou]

Noooooo team yellow all the way. While i confess its getting harder each time, the surprise is amazing and i totally would never ask for the gender. I have to have growth scans due to my hypothyroidism so at 30+ weeks sometimes you don't get a choice as boy bits are hard to mistake but we've had 3 surprise births and its added magic. There are so few surprises left in life now, we both wanted to keep this one. I also break down and so does my husband when you get that 'its a .....' Moment. I do have a few gd issues too so the instant bond i felt would help with any disappointment i felt.

Ultimately its up to you. What about having the sonographer write it down and you can jeep it sealed until an agreed time later in the regnancy so less chance if slip ups. And you never know , you may not have a choice if baby us bring uncooperative lol.

 

[Lozzielaula]

Ah we were both on opposite ends of the spectrum lol I wanted to find out and OH didnt! Initially we agreed I could find out and he wouldnt, because he wants the surprise. After many what-if conversations, I've come round to his way of thinking. We want a boy and a girl, so we would be happy either way. My biggest hurdle was getting over the idea of a surprise, because I hate surprises! That was my whole issue with wanting to know or not. Besides, as it has been said, they do sometimes get the gender wrong and I would hate to bond with a child thinking it's a girl when it's really a boy and end up feeling dissapointed, which I wouldnt be if I had kept myself open to either gender during the pregnancy.

 

[Angel_blues]

I'll bring that up sounds like an excellent plan!

 

[Earthylove]

I really want to wait till the baby is born to find out if it is a boy or girl. Like the others have said, I would love the surprise aspect. And also, for me I don't want any gender specific things, since this will be our first of hopefully several children and i want to be able to reuse stuff. I also don't want people buying me a bunch of pink or blue things or things with baseballs on it. lol. I suppose in that sense, my DH and i could always find out and just not tell anyone, but it would be very hard to not slip up or just cave. Plus, like i said, i want to experience the mystery and surprise.

 

[.Jelly.Welly.]

I'm in the same position angel_blues. When we have our first I really don't want to know what we're having, but he would quite like to!

But he has a beautiful son from a previous marriage, he didn't find out the first time, but would like to this time, because he thinks it makes preperation easier.

As it'll be my first, so he has said ultimately I can choose whether we know I think it'll just depend on the day, when we finally get there!

 

[MummyKP]

We will find out when the time comes, thankfully we both feel the same about it! Lol.

 

[bcos21]

I didn't want to know until birth, my husband begged and begged at the ultrasound so I told him we could find out. I swore him to secrecy until the birth but he ended up telling his whole family and lying about it, I almost killed him. I was honestly so disappointed in the whole thing. Next time we are not finding out until the end. We have talked about it and he wants to do some kind of gender reveal party, its not happening.

 

[pansorie]

My husband wants to find out, but also said he is leaving the decision 100% up to me. I do not want to find out, but I am not completely ruling it out. As of right now, though, we are waiting until labor and delivery.