Does the feeling of wanting another baby ever go away?

[rebeccalouise]

I don't think it'll ever go away for me, but if my partner didn't want anymore I would NEVER trap him into it. If you love your partner, you respect what they want just as much as what you want.

I'm stupidly broody at the moment, a few of my friends are pregnant & it's making me so jealous!

 

[Amy2701]

My want for another hasn't gone away yet. We knew that we wanted our first two very close together - there is a 13 month age gap between them. We've agreed to have one more, but we're not starting TTC until the beginning of 2015. I'm hoping the feeling goes away after #3 cause we're definitely not having 4! X

 

[bookworm0901]

I watched a Dr. Phil where a woman got pregnant with 3 or 4 children by her husband having sex with her while she was asleep!! She finally realized with one child because she got pregnant even though they hadn't had sex in several months. While this is a more serious situation because the sex wasn't consensual, the deception is the same. He wanted more kids and she didn't. It ruined every ounce of trust she ever had. That same episode had a woman who claimed their LO was an accident because she was on BC but she had really stopped taking her pill, that relationship was ruined too.

My DH and I don't have secrets and I couldn't live my life harboring a secret that huge from my partner. The guilt would eat me alive. I also respect him and value his opinions and wants regarding expanding our family.

 

[kimberleyrobx]

I watched a Dr. Phil where a woman got pregnant with 3 or 4 children by her husband having sex with her while she was asleep!! She finally realized with one child because she got pregnant even though they hadn't had sex in several months. While this is a more serious situation because the sex wasn't consensual, the deception is the same. He wanted more kids and she didn't. It ruined every ounce of trust she ever had. That same episode had a woman who claimed their LO was an accident because she was on BC but she had really stopped taking her pill, that relationship was ruined too.

My DH and I don't have secrets and I couldn't live my life harboring a secret that huge from my partner. The guilt would eat me alive. I also respect him and value his opinions and wants regarding expanding our family.

Are you sure that was real? Surely the woman must of been aware of having sex? Wow, she must be a very heavy sleeper

 

[bookworm0901]

I watched a Dr. Phil where a woman got pregnant with 3 or 4 children by her husband having sex with her while she was asleep!! She finally realized with one child because she got pregnant even though they hadn't had sex in several months. While this is a more serious situation because the sex wasn't consensual, the deception is the same. He wanted more kids and she didn't. It ruined every ounce of trust she ever had. That same episode had a woman who claimed their LO was an accident because she was on BC but she had really stopped taking her pill, that relationship was ruined too.

My DH and I don't have secrets and I couldn't live my life harboring a secret that huge from my partner. The guilt would eat me alive. I also respect him and value his opinions and wants regarding expanding our family.

Are you sure that was real? Surely the woman must of been aware of having sex? Wow, she must be a very heavy sleeper

Maybe he had a tiny penis? no seriously, it was real. She was an extremely heavy sleeper and he always worried that she didn't love him as much as he loved her, and he felt more secure in their relationship with each child. It was sick!

I found the story:

https://www.drphil.com/slideshows/slideshow/2932/?id=2932&slide=0&showID=627&preview=&versionID=

He deceived her in some way with every child!

 

[6lilpigs]

Woah!! The anger! I can honestly say that a little suprise gift of another child in a steady home would be seen as a blessing. Can a man seriously not be happy with a beautiful new baby in the home? I honesly find that hard to believe, who could resist that little face!! The rape story is sad, that I can agree with, but I in s steady home, a beautiful little oops, I know my DH wouldnt stay angry for long, possibly 15 minutes lol

 

[Feronia]

DH and I never wanted children, but almost 10 years into our relationship, I changed my mind. As you can imagine, this was a huge blow to him. Obviously it would have been FAR easier to fake an accident and deal with the consequences, but I respect him and we both had to be on the same page. Breaking the news to him that I wanted a child after so long of mutually agreeing that kids weren't for us was incredibly difficult. We argued and had long discussions on the topic, our future, how our relationship would change, etc. for months and months, and in the end, he agreed. If you're ever thinking of tricking your partner into a child, it means you need to TALK and be open about how you're feeling!

I should add that he's a WONDERFUL father and keeps commenting that this is the best year of his life. I'm so glad that he's happy with the outcome, but this would feel horrible if I deceived him.

 

[onetwothreebp]

Woah!! The anger! I can honestly say that a little suprise gift of another child in a steady home would be seen as a blessing. Can a man seriously not be happy with a beautiful new baby in the home? I honesly find that hard to believe, who could resist that little face!! The rape story is sad, that I can agree with, but I in s steady home, a beautiful little oops, I know my DH wouldnt stay angry for long, possibly 15 minutes lol

You make me sick. The fact that you're continuing to defend something so wrong just boggles my mind. You obviously can't be reasoned with.

And for the last time - IT WOULD NOT BE A "SURPRISE" GIFT.

 

[AngelUK]

I don't see why ppl have to get so angry and heated about this. I would never have an oops either but every relationship is different. Maybe in PP's relationship a No means "No but if it happens, Yay." Yes, her advice isn't good advice but when I originally read it I took it to be a tongue in cheek comment and not serious advice from one woman to ALL women. Please let's not get so het up?
I wanted to share my deep longing with other women cause I truly believe only other women with the same longing would ever understand the feeling.

 

[onetwothreebp]

Considering she keeps defending her comment, it's obviously not tongue in cheek. And it's not about "if it happens, yay" since she said men don't know what's right for them and need help deciding. It's so violating and wrong!! How you don't see that, I don't understand.

 

[AngelUK]

Maybe I am just more eager to see the good in posts and try to be calm and friendly to all. But I don't like one person being mobbed either and I am therefore trying to defend her a little. Besides, again her defence to me at least sounded as if it was meant in humorous way.

 

[onetwothreebp]

I understand that but it just frustrates me the amount of times I see such advice offered here and I think of the poor women who are desperate enough to try it and they could ruin their relationships. She's not being mobbed, but there is a reason why people are disagreeing with her.

 

[AngelUK]

I don't think it is just here. It is sadly a common practice among many women I do hope that the ones on here who did this sort of thing were lucky enough to have a very welcoming partner. PP obviously does, as she has 10 children I think? But I have never yet met a shaky relationship that was mended by having a baby

 

[onetwothreebp]

I know. And for the women who lose their relationships for a baby... I hope it was worth it.

 

[6lilpigs]

Maybe I am just more eager to see the good in posts and try to be calm and friendly to all. But I don't like one person being mobbed either and I am therefore trying to defend her a little. Besides, again her defence to me at least sounded as if it was meant in humorous way.

Thankyou!!!! I'm so pleased your read it as it has all been written, humourous! From post 1 and onwards rofl!!! I have to admit the anger does fuel my naughtier humourous side but I can't help looking at the brighter side of most situations, just one of lifes jolly people I never thought my original witty post would create such chaos!!! LOL

 

[Noelle610]

Woah!! The anger! I can honestly say that a little suprise gift of another child in a steady home would be seen as a blessing. Can a man seriously not be happy with a beautiful new baby in the home? I honesly find that hard to believe, who could resist that little face!! The rape story is sad, that I can agree with, but I in s steady home, a beautiful little oops, I know my DH wouldnt stay angry for long, possibly 15 minutes lol

I'm sorry if our posts came off in anger, but it's very serious to encourage someone to be aggressively deceptive in their relationship.

I have a very strong, very solid relationship and I do not think an "oops baby" would be seen as a blessing for many reasons. My husband and I are in a very good place, but we had an extremely high needs child. We wouldn't trade her for the world, but between her personality and my PND, it almost killed us.

 

[onetwothreebp]

My son was very easy going but between the adjustment of an unexpected baby and my PND, I almost lost the most important thing in my life - my relationship with my husband. I would never wish that on somebody else and I would never suggest, even in 'jest' for somebody to purposefully have a 'surprise' baby.

 

[6lilpigs]

I have been lucky not to have experienced any pnd and so to me babies have only ever been associated wirh happiness, and have always brought with them more stability and joy to all, which is why I do love to try and encourage everyone to bring a little more into their homes, even if it would be a crafty little oops as I would love everyone to have what I have

 

[onetwothreebp]

Crafty little oops?

STILL NOT RIGHT.

 

[AngelUK]

I am thinking you are the best example that that feeling of wanting another baby never leaves