Early 30's TTC #1

[MsJMouse]

Good to hear your test results have come back with no probs mrsmax I have no idea what tests they do as we haven't gotten to that point and from what I recall of my followup appt with my ob is I think as I actually fell pregnant, it restarts the 12months again before they will even look at any tests.

The bd'ing every other night from cd 10 to about cd 22 (I have o'd at about cd22 before) is our plan at the moment.. Not doing anything else - now to see if I can drag my dh away from the motor racing on TV

Today I am feeling old. I know I am not but it just occurred to me today that unless I get that BFP this month and end up with a xmas baby, I will be a whole year older before I have a baby as my birthday is in January. I had so wanted a baby by the time I was 28 and now it looks like I will be at least 32 before we have one.

 

[Crumbs]

Hi ladies,

I am 32 and TTC #4 after having Mirena removed 3-14-11 (beginning of cycle). I am hoping that I can find a cycle buddy. I have no idea how to go about finding a match to myself; but here are some stats.

I have 28 day cycles 5-6 days long (Af started 3-14 ended 3-19) forcasted Ovulation according to calendar was 3-28-11. I am now 6 dpo and in 2ww period. next Af due on 4-11. I recently bought a OPK for if AF shows her ugly face this month. I am not charting and actually know the bare minimum about it. I am the mom of 2 boys and 1 girl. Would love some insight and tips on BB charting as well as a cycle buddy. I will be testing on 4-6. SSBD to all those trying to conceive, and thanks in advance...

Hi FngrsCrossed, welcome to babyandbump! I noticed you're fairly new here and hopefully you'll be able to find this site as helpful and supportive as I have. It might be a little easier to find a cycle buddy by starting your own thread (in the TTC Buddies section). This one is for those of us sharing our journey in conceiving our 1st baby.

Best of luck to you and babydust!

 

[rosababy]

mrsmax, great to hear that everything is fine! I will seriously punch the next person who tells me to "relax," so I understand your frustration there! I thought there were a lot of tests too, but maybe it's just the hcg? What were your SA results like again? Another year is so long, I know. My doc was like I know it's frustrating, but you'll get pregnant. It's just taking a little longer than usual. I'm like WELL GREAT. I haven't spent much on BnB in the last few days, and I've been so relaxed. I haven't thought much about ttc, especially since I'm not temping or opk'ing. I try to come on once a day, but it IS helping not to be on all day long like I normally am.

MsJmouse, we're bd'ing every other day from cd 12- 20 as well. I've o'ed as late as 19 before, so best to cover our bases. I know how you feel about feeling old. I'm 32, and if we don't get preggo in the next few cycles, I'll be 33 when my first kid is born. I feel like that's old, especially since I want a few kids, and don't want to be 70 when they graduate college! I'm trying not to worry about how long it takes us, though. I could just kick myself for waiting this long, but we weren't ready a few years ago. However, had I known it was going to take this long, we would have started earlier.

 

[MsJMouse]

mrsmax, great to hear that everything is fine! I will seriously punch the next person who tells me to "relax," so I understand your frustration there! I thought there were a lot of tests too, but maybe it's just the hcg? What were your SA results like again? Another year is so long, I know. My doc was like I know it's frustrating, but you'll get pregnant. It's just taking a little longer than usual. I'm like WELL GREAT. I haven't spent much on BnB in the last few days, and I've been so relaxed. I haven't thought much about ttc, especially since I'm not temping or opk'ing. I try to come on once a day, but it IS helping not to be on all day long like I normally am.

MsJmouse, we're bd'ing every other day from cd 12- 20 as well. I've o'ed as late as 19 before, so best to cover our bases. I know how you feel about feeling old. I'm 32, and if we don't get preggo in the next few cycles, I'll be 33 when my first kid is born. I feel like that's old, especially since I want a few kids, and don't want to be 70 when they graduate college! I'm trying not to worry about how long it takes us, though. I could just kick myself for waiting this long, but we weren't ready a few years ago. However, had I known it was going to take this long, we would have started earlier.

I am so glad I am not the only one who feels old (even though we are so NOT!! ). Everyone I have mentioned it to keeps telling it is not old but half of them are people who had their first baby in their twenties. We would have tried earlier but then I got really sick and could have died without some very expensive surgery which then took us ages to recover from, both physically and financially. Oh well life is definately a roller coaster ride. Some smooth sailing would be really appreciated at the moment.

 

[Soleil Breeze]

Feeling some trepidation...last day of clomid tonight. It hasn't been bad yet. I had some stabbing pains in my left ovary on Sunday and Monday, which wasn't pleasant (I was pleading - don't burst ovary! I'm prone to ovarian cysts and I know clomid isn't too good if you have problems with cysts). Anyway, next week might be the IUI. I don't know how I feel about it; very mixed emotions. Do I want that long plastic tube up through my cervix and into my uterus? No. Do I want a baby. Yeah...

I'm saying "yeah" and not "yes" because the thought of having to go through multiple IUIs makes me unhappy.

Onto good news! DH got his second SA results back and they were great! Much better than last time. His motility went from 39% to 55% and his count from 84 to 129 million! Yeah! I totally suggest FertilAid for your guys!

Doc [not our regular fertility doc] doesn't see a problem with us getting pregnant with his results. He asks DH, has the wife been checked out? YES! Done all the required tests. Sigh.

Ok; I'm off again. I need to stop thinking ahead about the IUI. I can't stand stuff going up *there* unless it's DH's *friend*.

I hope everyone is doing well.

 

[SMFirst]

Hi Ladies

I am back from my little 4-day get-away to wine country. I enjoyed being able to drink wine and sit in the hot tub and not have to worry about anything I ate. Benefits of not being pregnant.

My DH actually mentioned in an ideal world he would rather not have a January baby, but we'll still try this month of course

Again, due to my belief in murphy's law this will thus be the month I'll get pregnant - not to mention that I now have 10 bottles of wine to drink!!

Have you guys ever tried ice-wine? I didn't really know much about it other than it is sweet but oh boy is it ever good!! I also bought a few desert wines and a few bottles of international award-winning wines (not that I could tell that it was so good but I liked it anyway)

hope all is well with everyone

Soleil - glad your DH's results came back good. I understand how you feel about the IUI, it's not something I would like either.. Best of luck with just the clomid!

Rosa - being off this site these last couple days has helped me relax about things too.. but it's a toss up since everyone are like friends here!

 

[rosababy]

Soleil, that is EXCELLENT news about your dh's SA!!!! :yippee: FertilAid...I've thought about it, actually. My dh already takes a multi-vitamin, Maca, and just started taking pycnogenol. This particular supplement has been proven to actually help morphology, which is the one that's low for him. He didn't want to take it, and I was so disappointed. I found it in the vitamin cabinet this morning. He's so sweet. I asked him about it, and he said he knew it would make me feel better, so he's down with it.

I think you'll be fine with an IUI. Think about everything that the have to get through to get to the egg! This basically helps them along. That's awesome! I've heard it doesn't hurt, and it's pretty easy. I'd love to have one! Sorry you've been in pain with clomid. Hopefully it means your ovaries are working hard to produce some good eggs. I had some cramps throughout the entire cycle last time, but not much this cycle. Just major emotions. Up and down. Hated it. Hopefully it gives me a baby soon!

Susan,

I HAVE had ice wine! Not a huge fan of it...we used to live in Michigan, and they make a lot of it there. We live in Virginia wine country, which is actually pretty large (lots of wineries, I mean). We go wine tasting all the time, and that's the thing I'll miss the most when I"m preggo. We're going this Saturday, even though I'll be o'ing. I'm DONE with acting like I'm pregnant when I'm not. I'm afraid to workout too hard, afraid to drink too much, afraid to...fill in the blank. I want to live my life, and when I actually get that 2nd line on the pee stick, I'll start acting like I'm preggo.

I'm glad you had a nice relaxing time! Of course now that you've bought the wine is the month you'll get pregnant!

 

[SMFirst]

That's my plan now too Rosa- I am not going to act like I am pregnant and am going to try to avoid thinking about it too much until I actually am..

I've heard mixed reviews about ice-wine - I guess at the cost per ounce you are only meant to have a sip at a time! I'm a sugar-lover myself so that's why I like it!

I think I would like to live closer to real wineries and go for tastings, that would be fun!

I'm being pestered by my needy cat right now - he's like our surrogate child (and certainly acts like one a lot of the time!)

 

[hemmysgirl]

mrsmax, great to hear that everything is fine! I will seriously punch the next person who tells me to "relax," so I understand your frustration there! I thought there were a lot of tests too, but maybe it's just the hcg? What were your SA results like again? Another year is so long, I know. My doc was like I know it's frustrating, but you'll get pregnant. It's just taking a little longer than usual. I'm like WELL GREAT. I haven't spent much on BnB in the last few days, and I've been so relaxed. I haven't thought much about ttc, especially since I'm not temping or opk'ing. I try to come on once a day, but it IS helping not to be on all day long like I normally am.

MsJmouse, we're bd'ing every other day from cd 12- 20 as well. I've o'ed as late as 19 before, so best to cover our bases. I know how you feel about feeling old. I'm 32, and if we don't get preggo in the next few cycles, I'll be 33 when my first kid is born. I feel like that's old, especially since I want a few kids, and don't want to be 70 when they graduate college! I'm trying not to worry about how long it takes us, though. I could just kick myself for waiting this long, but we weren't ready a few years ago. However, had I known it was going to take this long, we would have started earlier.

I am so glad I am not the only one who feels old (even though we are so NOT!! ). Everyone I have mentioned it to keeps telling it is not old but half of them are people who had their first baby in their twenties. We would have tried earlier but then I got really sick and could have died without some very expensive surgery which then took us ages to recover from, both physically and financially. Oh well life is definately a roller coaster ride. Some smooth sailing would be really appreciated at the moment.

I feel the same way.....I'm 30 and it just feels old when all your friends/family had a baby or several babies in their twenties. But we need to constantly tell ourselves that we are NOT old, by any means!! Women today are having babies much later in life and our plan is not everyone else's! We need to be comfortable living out our lives and not compare them to others...that's the way to true happiness and calm (SOOO much easier said than done, but I'll go crazy unless I believe that! I truly do, though)

Surgery was definitely needed, sounds like! I'm so glad everything turned out for you MsJMouse! Now your body is ready to conceive, now that it's better, right! GL and baby dust!!

mrsmax, same to you.....I'm glad to meet some 30's women here!

 

[rosababy]

Susan, ice wine is definitely meant to be sipped. I used to like really sweet wines, and I'm slowly headed to the drier side of things...still whites, though. Someday, I expect to wake up and be in love with red wines. Wine tasting is the best. For my 30th, my dh booked a b&b in another part of VA wine country (about 2 hours away) and we went winery hopping! It was so fun!

My neighbor/friend said she drank until she got the bfp. Just enjoyed life. I have not been doing that, and it's making me so unhappy. Now with that said, I know our bodies "work" better when we have fewer toxins in our body, so I'm torn. Especially with my dh, since he has a few minor sperm issues...he's not drinking as much either.

Well said, hemmysgirl and mrsmouse! We are NOT old. I really don't feel old, it's just when I compare myself to my friends who are the same age or younger that have 2 kids. My dh reminds me of all the things we've done and places we've gone that we wouldn't have had the opportunity to do with kids. That's true. We weren't ready for kids then, and we would have been unhappy. Now, we'll appreciate these babies SO much more than we would have. I just wish we didn't have to be "punished" by having to ttc for so long!

 

[SMFirst]

Happy Weekend Everyone Hope you all have some plans to relax or maybe get outside in the spring weather!

I bought some new running shoes so I am actually looking forward to going on a short run (my new approach to exercise is to take it easy so that I might actually enjoy it rather than feeling exhausted)

Counter to exercising: I am also excited to choose another bottle of wine to open and drink hehe

 

[rosababy]

Thanks, Susan! It's raining here, and is supposed to continue to rain all weekend. Nothing a little wine tasting won't cure. Good attitude towards exercising. Mine is just to do what feels good, and not to push it too much. But also not to act like I'm pregnant already and stop doing things.

Where is everyone? It's been so quiet in here lately...

 

[hemmysgirl]

mmmmmmm wine lol The older I get, the more I like wine....not sure why! I just can't handle multiple bottles of Smirnoff Ice anymore....makes me too bloated! Oh well, it's icky here now too, so I'm off to watch "Twilight" and maybe hunt around for some wine....it's got to be here somewhere!

Happy Weekend!

 

[Birdie Dorf]

Hello ladies! Over 30 and ttc #1 here. So glad to find a chatty forum. Just mc-ed last month after 7 months of trying. Feeling mostly OK though....

I think I am 7dpo. Not really supposed to be trying but we're not actively preventing.

 

[mrsmax]

Rosa - it has been quiet on here recently. Weird. It is beautiful here in the UK and I have spent all day reading and relaxing in the sunshine. Trying hard not to think too much about ttc and it is working - but I have to check in here to see how everyone is.

SMFirst - I love, love, love wine. At the clinic they told us to drink less we didnt drink much anyways, but it does suck to act pregnant when you're not.

Welcome Birdie dorf.

 

[mrsmax]

Also, meant to say I have started exercising again. I stopped in Jan in case it was stopping us ttc, but I miss it. So have just started get fit classes again. Feels good

 

[SMFirst]

mrsmax - gald you are enjoying the weather!

Welcome Birdie - sorry for your loss. I found it took a couple of months to really feel like I was over my loss and ready to try again (which is now for us). Feel free to post whatever is on your mind - we are here to support each other! Best of luck to you

 

[Birdie Dorf]

Thanks for the welcome ladies. I just feel like not trying is more of a punishment than what actually happened. I try to keep telling myself at least i know I can conceive independently and I now know what the first 8 weeks feels like...

I think my OPKs are zany however. It was dark last Friday and now also today... guess this is just the month where we figure things out. Have to go back to MW on Tuesday to make sure everything is OK. Dreading another visit but glad to feel like we're moving forward.

 

[MsJMouse]

hemmygirl and Birdie Dorf. Sorry to hear of your loss Birdie Dorf.

It is Autumn here in Oz and the nights are getting cooler but today is the most gorgeous sunny day and not super hot. Gotta love Autumn and Spring.

Had a lovely night with friends and some wine the other night which was great but then yesterday (probably cause I was really really tired after the late night) I had a mini meltdown about TTC. DH was up for some more BD'ing but I just couldn't be bothered as I feel like I am out for this month (not sure if I actually o'd even if my ticker says I am 3dpo). Cue the tears Sigh. I hate this feeling of no control. Some tips on not thinking about TTC would be great as it just seems to be in the back of my mind most of the time

Thanks, Susan! It's raining here, and is supposed to continue to rain all weekend. Nothing a little wine tasting won't cure. Good attitude towards exercising. Mine is just to do what feels good, and not to push it too much. But also not to act like I'm pregnant already and stop doing things.

Where is everyone? It's been so quiet in here lately...

I have been going to Zumba classes on a weekly basis since Sept last year. Love it - it is my pick me up for the week as I am so busy trying to follow the instructor I forget about just about everything else. My GP said it was fine for me to continue Zumbaing when I fell pregnant as I had already been doing it before I fell pregnant - I just toned the moves down a bit. I also try to walk regularly (when it is not raining as it just keeps drizzling lately - we seem to have stolen the British weather ). I figure it is better to keep active and exercising before I fall pregnant as I want to keep active while pregnant (well as much as I am allowed to anyway).

 

[hopefulmama2b]

Welcome Hemmysgirl and Birdie!

Birdie Sorry to hear about your loss. I agree, It is hard to wait like the doctors say. Have you had an AF yet?

Susan- I just got new running shoes too! I was hoping they'd inspire me. They are the kind by Nike (free run +2) that are supposed to make you feel like you don't have shoes on. I don't know why I got them- cute and thought if other people like to feel like they don't have shoes I bet I do too. First time I wore them my shins hurt, which never happens! I'm gonna assume it's because I was on a tread mill and not outside. We shall see!

MsJ- I went to a Zumba class one time and totally sucked! I was so bad! I love dancing and love to exercise so I thought, perfect! I'm apparently uncoordinated at choreographed dance! I guess my girl band dreams are out.

I can't give you guys any advice on not thinking about TTC as I am horrible myself. I did stumble upon a thread on BnB that was a list of things to do during the 2ww, which made me laugh. Hope you guys enjoy it as much as I did:

The Two-Week Wait Activity List
14 Things To Do When 14 Days Seem Like Forever
by Lynn Steen

As any woman who is trying to get pregnant can tell you, the two weeks from ovulation to the due date for your next period are pure torture. You promise yourself you'll just wait it out, distract yourself with other activities and you won't even THINK about taking a pregnancy test until you're at least a day overdue. Then something happens - your breasts start hurting in a slightly different way than they did before, you get slightly nauseous, you have some spotting …Or nothing happens, but you find yourself waking up wishing you could go to sleep again so that it would be another day closer to knowing. You can't think, you can't sleep, you can't work, you start taking HPTs days before they are even possibly meaningful. You are deep in the abyss of THE TWO-WEEK WAIT!

In my opinion, it's no use advising women to stop obsessing, it's impossible. Instead, I give you a list of more productive ways to obsess. Please note, however, that there is a limit that each woman must define for herself, between indulging in some baby-daydreaming and going overboard. I've included some examples below:

1. Take a walk around your neighborhood and figure out what will be the best route for strolls with the baby. Find areas with nice sidewalks and easy curbs. Go ahead and daydream. But do NOT buy a stroller for the dog.

2. Clean out your closet to make room for the maternity stuff you'll be buying soon. Try on anything you haven't worn for six months. Yes, if you wish, you may put a pillow in your undies to see what will work as maternity wear. But taking a picture of yourself like that is going too far.

3. Start a journal. Write down everything you're feeling. It will be a great opening chapter for your child's baby book. If you can't put your feelings into words draw something, try to create a symbol that expresses the frustration you're feeling. Don't get that symbol tattooed on your ankle.

4. Plant a hope garden. Or a hope rosebush. Or a hope citrus tree. You want to grow something inside of you, well start by growing something outside of you. Nurture it. Feed it. Give it water. Talk to it. But do not send out birth announcements.

5. Get better at photography. Really learn how to work all the buttons and settings on your camera. Experiment! If you have a digital camera, get all the downloading and editing stuff worked out. You will be well-prepared once you have a baby, and will be able to get some great shots and get them emailed to your family before the child's graduation. Do not take photos of your cervical mucous, even if Toni Weschler begs you.

6. Make an appeal to the committee meeting going on inside you. Sperm, egg, uterus, corpus luteum, progesterone…they are in there either making a baby or not. Treat them like any other unruly committee you've ever addressed. Yes that's right, go ahead and talk to them. Put your hands on your stomach and tell them how much you respect them. Make your best argument in favor of a baby, and then let them decide. It's out of your hands. Addressing the committee within earshot of normal people is not recommended.

7. Paint your toenails. Imagine how difficult this will be when you are pregnant. Go shopping for the perfect pink and blue nailpolish in preparation for a celebration polish. Alternating colors on the day you find out you're pregnant, or a single color for the day you find out the baby's sex. Don't be tempted to paint a cycle day countdown on your big toes.

8. Make a cup of herbal tea. It is a nice ritual: boiling the water, adding the tea leaves, pouring into a nice china cup, adding some milk or sugar, sipping peacefully. Ahhhh. There's nothing that a nice cup of tea won't help. Yeah right. Well it does kill a little bit of time.

9. Swim laps. Think about the sperm and how they need to swim to your egg. Imagine that you are a sperm, the end of the pool is the egg, then GO, GO, GO! Don't wear a tail or anything. Just imagine it quietly.

10. Make lists. List who you will tell when you get pregnant and in what order. List all the chores you need to get done instead of obsessing about this. List all the healthy activities you intend to do this week. List all the girl and boy names you like. Lists are helpful for all sorts of things, most of all for passing time rather than actually doing something.

11. Create a fertility dance. Choose whatever music speaks to your soul and make up a dance routine as a prayer to the universe for the growth of an embryo. Move your hips, rotate your belly, let your arms flow… but close the curtains.

12. Prepare a folic acid feast. Cream of broccoli soup appetizer, followed by spinach lasagna, enriched whole grain garlic bread and frozen orange juice sorbet for dessert. Dedicate the meal to your baby-to-be. Just don't set a highchair at the table in his or her honor.

13. Delegate the burden of the two-week wait. Clearly someone has to worry constantly during this time, but does it have to be you? Divide the days up among your best friends and closest family. On their assigned day they are required to think,wonder, and worry all day about whether you are pregnant or not. At the end of the day they have to call or send you email describing how agonizing it was. Also they have to report to you if they had any "symptoms," such as sore breasts, excessive urination, nausea, bleeding, fatigue…You will be surprised how many people, male and female, have early pregnancy symptoms if they just look for them.