Early 30's TTC #1

[rosababy]

welcome, katerina! cute avatar!

mrsj and mrsmax, I am in the cycle now, but i started lupron (which is an injectable med that quiets the ovaries almost like menopause) on cd23 or so. Then, AF comes, and a few days later, I start a new med (or two for me) called bravelle and menopur. These drugs stimulate the ovaries to make LOTS of eggies, and nice BIG eggies. Throughout this "stimming" process, they give me internal ultra sounds to see how the drugs are working on my ovaries. They're counting the follicles (each follicle usually contains an egg) and measuring to see how big they are. Then, about 10 days later (about the time a regular woman would o), as long as the biggest follicles are measuring at a certain size (17mm or something like that), I give myself an hcg shot, which triggers ovulation. A day and a half later, I go in for my retrieval. They put me out completely and go in and take out all of the follicles. HOpefully they all contain eggs, but some may be empty and some may not be mature. So, let's say they take out 15 eggs. Maybe 12 of them are mature. Then, 10 actually fertilize (who knows why the other 2 don't...) then, let's say 6 make it to the day of the transfer. That would be an incredible number, actually. I'm hoping to have 1 to put in and a couple to freeze. They put one or two in, depending on the couple's wishes, and freeze the rest. Not all will make it through the thaw, either, but hopefully they do. Then, all it has to do is implant.

 

[mrsmax]

Ok so my AF must be due, as Rosa your post made me cry - like in an amazing way. What an awesome procedure. You're going to have a Sending you so much luck.

 

[rosababy]

oh no, mrsmax! Yes, that's af emotions, or maybe pregnancy emotions! It is an amazing procedure. So far, I've been fine with very few side effects. Just exhausted. A little more emotional than usual, but nothing I can't handle. Just so tired.

Oh, and af came this morning! I was waiting because I can't start the stimming drugs unless my period comes, which would have pushed my retrieval and transfer dates back. That would have been fine, but just annoying, especially since my dh and I already lined up subs for our classes.

 

[MrsPTTC]

Welcome Katerina

Rosa - wow what a process! It sounds so complicated but amazing. Wishing you all the luck in the world

Mrsmax - hope the dreaded stays away for you. We so need a BFP on this thread soon!!

Enjoy your weekend everyone xx

 

[piccolo]

Hello again ladies... it's been a long while! I needed to get off this site for a while.
I had to come back on to tell those of you on here who remember me that I finally got my BFP this morning, cycle 15! I'm still shaking, it hasn't totally sunk in.
People always ask what you did differently, and so here is my story. It wasn't trying any weird teas or vitamins, or particular positions or instead cups. What I did this month was simply changed my attitude. People always say "don't stress, stress interferes with conception," and that always made me so mad - I mean how can I just stop stressing? But this month I made a decision to try to actively change the negative thought patterns. It had become so autopilot to see a pregnant woman and get mad with jealousy. I told myself, "don't be jealous, be happy for her, that will be you soon." Even if I didn't totally feel that in my heart, actively saying it to myself prevented me from falling into a pattern of negativity that had become automatic. I also started to think about having a baby, not getting pregnant. I let myself think about the future, about having a child, instead of thinking about cycle days, pee sticks, symptoms and spotting. Easier said than done I know, but I just forced myself to do it. I looked at pictures of babies on the internet, trying to focus on the goal, not what my body couldn't do. I also downloaded a whole bunch of self hypnosis downloads from the internet. They were good for helping me to change those thought patterns, forcing me to relax. I also did visualizations of what was happening in my body, I don't know, maybe that helped too. It sounds stupid, but when I was by myself I repeated affirmations (or sometimes just in my head). Like "I will get pregnant when the time is right." Whenever the negative thoughts came in I tried to push them out instead of wallowing in them.
It may be just that I needed to go through the last year+ before I could reach that point, but I do think that a good part of it was making the choice to think differently. And if nothing else, I felt so much better this month. I wasn't the depressed person I've often been for the last year. So even if it hadn't happened this month, I was in a much better place mentally, and a much more pleasant person to be around!
Anyways, good luck to you all, and I hope this helps and isn't just annoying.

 

[rosababy]

piccolo!!! I'm so happy for you! Thank you for sharing your process. That sounds so healthy and you sound very happy. It's true...how do you NOT stress? I've been trying some of the same things this cycle. I'm also trying not to stress in general. Trying to not be in a hurry everywhere I go, driving, walking, etc. Just chillin' out. I tend to be tightly wound in general so I'm aggressively trying to chill.

Oh a funny note, is it bad that I always have to think of that lame cheerleading cheer when I think how to spell aggressive? I wasn't a cheerleader, but do you all know which one I mean?

be aggressive, B-E aggressive. B-E AGG-R ESSIVE! No...just me...?

 

[Alexi201]

Sorry to hear about the BFN MrsMax.

Alexi201 - odd that you are getting some many ?false BFPs - definitely something to ask the docs about. As MrsMax says a lot of people get their bfps at or just after the 6 month marks. Nice to see another Aussie!!

Thanks Mrs Max & MsJMouse.. Yeah it's strange! Well I just turned 32 so hoping my body is just gearing up for a pregnancy...7 is my fav number so hopefully I'll get my BFP this cycle (cycle 7)..I think May I def had a chemical pregnancy...as for the other months, well I don't over analyze them coz it doesn't make much sense to get 1 positive followed by negs nearly every cycle...I think my body is trying to do something but it's just not happening...I'm really excited about this month, trying not to stress or get sick and see how the charting goes....although my temps seem to be going up & down like last cycle when I was on antibiotics... :0(

Thanks for sharing Piccolo, I'm going to try and follow your example :0)

 

[MsJMouse]

Rosa - I didn't realise you had to take the drugs before AF to start the cycle off. That is really interesting and it makes sense (sorry the scientist in me talking ). Very glad to hear AF has arrived then so you don't have to push everything back. Yay for AF (bizzaire as that comments feels!!).

Piccolo - Yay for your BFP.

I really liked your comment - it makes sense to me. The mind is a strange thing and it controls everything in our bodies ultimately so what you have said makes sense. Plus I have read a book on Natural Fertility and it has suggested a similar thing. Now to go and put in to practice myself.

Good luck with the charting Alexi.

Welcome Katrina!

 

[Crumbs]

OMG, piccolo! I'm so happy for you! Congrats!!! Whenever someone gets a in our little group, I feel like it's just a matter of time before we're all Mommies! Wishing you a very smooth pregnancy and a beautiful and healthy baby! Thanks for sharing!!!

Rosa, wow! That sounds so awesome! I have never heard the details of IVF and I'm just amazed. You are sooo getting knocked-up soon Fx!!!

As for flying back home to get treatments, there's no way. I'm from California, the out of pocket costs would be astronomical without any coverage what-so-ever! There's just no way. Here in Sweden, it's covered. We still pay for the visits but that's nothing compared to how much I would pay if we lived back in Cali even with coverage!


MrsPTTC, ya know what, I don't exactly understand the term "weak ovulation". But they seem to throw it out a lot here. My progesterone tests came out low, even when I made sure I had it done at 7 DPO and not CD21. When I did it the first time, it showed I didn't ovulate which was horse&%$ because that same month I got a vag-ultra and my lining was thick. Same with this month, I got comments about my lining being thick and that I, for certain ovulated. Yet my tests show I didn't. Maybe it just takes my body awhile for my progesterone to peak? It's a problem

 

[MrsPTTC]

Yay for your Piccolo!

Crumbs - oh dear, what a pain your results are all contradicting each other!! So what's next for you, are they considering Clomid? x

 

[finallyready]

Congrats Piccolo!! I love checking in on this thread and hearing BFPs! Happy and Healthy 9 months.

 

[hopefulmama2b]

Piccolo!! What amazing news! I often wonder how you've been and hoping for an update and what a great update that was! Congrats, hun! So happy for you!

 

[Regalpeas]

Congrats Piccolo!!! That's wonderful news

Hi ladies. Sorry I've been doing drive by posting in this thread for goodness knows how long...but I would like to post here more often. When I am away I think of you ladies and the things you all have said.

I think I'm going to read back through this thread to make sure I am fully up to date with everyone's story. That should take a few days. lol

AFM, I'm eagerly awaiting the results of DH's SA. They should be in today. I'm also CD1 CYCLE 15 I just have a strong feeling my time is near. but not this cycle. . I'll be back after I catch up.

to us all.

 

[mrsmax]

Hi Regalpeas - welcome back.

Piccolo - that is awesome. Congtas

AF arrived on Sunday as expected, but after getting so many BFNs I wasnt surprised or even that disapointed. After 17 months you start to get used to it. Still, will go see private clinic soon and I am going to to the Fertility Show in November! It is like a Boat Show or Home Show, but for fertility. Lots of really interesting speakers and stuff so should be cool.

MsJ and Piccolo- the mind is an amazing thing and that is what I am going to work on over the next couple of months. PMA and Relaxation etc.

 

[Soleil Breeze]

And although cycle is either beginning today or tomorrow (I've doing the usual spotting even though I took clomid this cycle), I don't feel down about it. I am EXCITED because I am going to do an IUI in a couple of weeks and I KNOW we will get pregnant. So four and a half weeks from now I will be on here saying that IUI worked again! IT WILL! And this time we will not lose the baby.

DH is terribly down about the impending AF. He's very frustrated at his swimmers and was so sure we had it this cycle. I told him, baby, your stuff is good, my eggs are good, they just have trouble meeting. They will meet in a couple of weeks.

I am going to try and take Piccolo's advice and be more positive. I won't even contemplate the IUI not working. IT WILL WORK.

Piccolo CONGRATS, my friend! Cheers to a healthy, sticky baby bean!

Oh, and mrspttc, don't worry at all about the twins possibility. This conceiving thing is sooo strange and difficult. When I was pregnant in April of this year I had taken clomid. I had two eggs mature and pop (evidence that, yes, clomid helps you to produce more than one egg), but only ONE got fertilized in the end.

Alexi and Katerina - welcome! You will find the girls on this thread lovely, supportive and encouraging and Alexi, your May cycle really does sound like an early pregnancy loss. I don't think you will have too much difficulty getting pregnant. So fingers crossed for you! On another note, I don't want to overanalyse the test results that you provided. But my fertility doctor has me on synthroid because my TSH levels were slightly higher than yours and he said that they need to be close to 1.0 for better conception purposes. Just putting it out there.

Rosa - I am so excited for you girl! We are going to to get pregnant this month! July babies for us! I tell you so! Oh, and I think that your whole feeling chunky thing is great! We need to have pounds around our bellies so that our stretch marks won't be so bad!!

Enjoy the rest of your days! I'll be here with two weeks of positive energy. IUI! IUI! As soon as my period comes, I'm going to start think of myself as pregnant. When a week goes by, I will be one week pregnant. Two weeks, then have the IUI, three weeks...and then when I test at the end of the fourth week I WILL BE four weeks pregnant!

xx

 

[hakunamatata]

Congrats piccolo!!!!!!

Can't wait to hear the results RP!

 

[MsJMouse]

Just waiting for AF to arrive and on to cycle 7 post MC. I really had some hope this month as we fell pregnant the first time on cycle 6 and this month was cycle 6 post MC. Have had a number of BFN and temp dropped a heap this morning so just waiting now.

Gee I wish I had your positivity right now Soliel - I really just want to cry I know cycle 13 isn't a long time compared to some of you but the doctor has basically said that if the blood tests and DH's SA comes back okay we have to keep trying until at least February as that will be 12 months since we lost our baby before he will send us for further testing/help as it is obvious that we can fall pregnant cause it happened once before. But so much for being more fertile post MC - no such luck here.

Sorry for my horrible rant.

Hope everyone is doing okay.

 

[MrsPTTC]

AFM, I'm eagerly awaiting the results of DH's SA. They should be in today. I'm also CD1 CYCLE 15 I just have a strong feeling my time is near. but not this cycle. . I'll be back after I catch up.

How were the SA results Regal?

AF arrived on Sunday as expected, but after getting so many BFNs I wasnt surprised or even that disapointed. After 17 months you start to get used to it. Still, will go see private clinic soon and I am going to to the Fertility Show in November! It is like a Boat Show or Home Show, but for fertility. Lots of really interesting speakers and stuff so should be cool.

Sorry for the showing mrsmax That Fertility Show sounds fab!! Where’s it on at?

Oh, and mrspttc, don't worry at all about the twins possibility. This conceiving thing is sooo strange and difficult. When I was pregnant in April of this year I had taken clomid. I had two eggs mature and pop (evidence that, yes, clomid helps you to produce more than one egg), but only ONE got fertilized in the end.

Enjoy the rest of your days! I'll be here with two weeks of positive energy. IUI! IUI! As soon as my period comes, I'm going to start think of myself as pregnant. When a week goes by, I will be one week pregnant. Two weeks, then have the IUI, three weeks...and then when I test at the end of the fourth week I WILL BE four weeks pregnant! xx

Soleil, I am LOVING the postitivity!! And thanks for the info, I’m fine with the twins thing now, if I did conceive twins it would be a blessing, and if there is more than one egg there then realistically it’s just increasing the chance of having ONE fertilise and give me my baby P!

Gee I wish I had your positivity right now Soliel - I really just want to cry I know cycle 13 isn't a long time compared to some of you but the doctor has basically said that if the blood tests and DH's SA comes back okay we have to keep trying until at least February as that will be 12 months since we lost our baby before he will send us for further testing/help as it is obvious that we can fall pregnant cause it happened once before. But so much for being more fertile post MC - no such luck here. Sorry for my horrible rant. Hope everyone is doing okay.

to you MsJMouse. Sorry you are feeling down. I’m cycle 12 but just about to hit month 13 – maybe it will be lucky 13!

Well I’ve got 8 days to go before my holiday, I’m excited, and also for the next cycle so I can get cracking with the clomid. Started BD’ing last night, expecting to ovulate around Monday but I’m not temping or OPK’ing, just relying on my CM and CP.

Good luck everyone x

 

[Regalpeas]

Hey Ladies!!!

MrsMax- Sorry about AF. I think the same way sometimes. After while you kinda prepare yourself for the let down. but I think that's what makes the eventually BFP that much more sweeter.
A Fertility show sounds so intriguing. I wonder if they have them internationally.

Soleil-that is so exciting about your IUI. Does your insurance pay for it?

MrsPTTC
- Holiday is so close for you. That's great. Also yay for Clomid!

Thanks Hakuna
!


AFM,
My Ob/GYN called today stating she was worried about DH's results. She said she would like us to see a FS specialist right away. She even said she would prefer for us to focus on that over weight loss although weight loss is important for my overall health.

She's sending the results in the mail but she says that DH has low concentration, low volume and low motility and we would need assistance to conceive with those results, but she said she did not want to say for sure because she's not in RE. DH did not take the news well. He wants to see the results himself and is already requesting a second testing/ opinion. Me...well I just shrunk inside because w/o seeing it I don't know what it means. Also, the dr was so obsessed about my losing weight and now she says THIS is more important. I've googled what she said and of course people say have faith, but really it's kinda leads to what she said. However, I don't know what his numbers are yet so I wont get so down until we can read the results.

(Sorry copied my update from my journal b/c emotionally I'm just exhausted at this point)

 

[hopefulmama2b]

Sorry I have been so busy I've been reading and running. Just wanted to say that I'm sorry for the AF that have come.
MrsMax- Glad to hear you have plans with the private clinic and that show sounds great! I wish we had one here.
j- Sorry to hear about AF. This whole process is beyond frustrating and I hate that we all have to go through it.
Regal- I'm sure your DH feels bad. I hope that you guys get the help you need to move forward and I think it's good that they've identified a problem that can hopefully be fixed, but I know that's not too comforting right now
Soliel- wonderful PMA!!
MrsPTTC- good luck with the clomid!! FX!!!

Baby dust to everyone