Ever worked in retail/food service/the like?

Lilaala

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I have laughed so hard at so many of these! Had to share the link!!

https://notalwaysright.com :haha:

Garden Store | Canada

Me: “Good afternoon, how can I help you?”

Caller: “Can you tell me if you carry Chlamydia?”

Me: *long pause* “Um… I’m sorry, is this a plant you are looking for?”

Caller: “Yes! The pink one. You know, Chlamydia!”

Me: “Do you mean Cyclamen?”

Caller: “Yeah! Cyclamen, Chlamydia, they’re all the same thing. So, do you have anyone there that can give me some Chlamydia?”

Call Center | Chatsworth, CA, USA

(Note: our customer support number is close to a local driving school’s number.)

Me: “Thank you for calling. How may I help you?”

Customer: “How much for my daughter?”

Me: “Um…”

Customer: “She’s 16. It’s her first time. She needs training.”

Me: “Sir, I think you want the driving school.”

Customer: “Oh, what do you guys do?”

Me: “Adult websites.”

Customer: “Oh…OH! Oh my God!”

Fast Food | Indianapolis, IN, USA

(The customer rips the lid off of the shake I just hand her and frowns.)

Customer: “What is this?”

Me: “That’s a vanilla shake.”

Customer: “No it isn’t. I want a vanilla shake.”

Me: “Well, I made it myself so I promise you it’s vanilla. Would you like me to remake it?”

Customer: “No, I just want a vanilla shake! This doesn’t look like vanilla at all. It’s all yellow.”

Me: “Ah, the vanilla syrup gives the shake a yellow tinge. It’s
supposed to look like that.”

Customer: “Oh, it’s not ME you have to convince, it’s the seven year-old in the car. He won’t be happy!”

College | Sydney, Australia

(I work in enrollment in my university.)

Me: “What degree would you like to enrol in?”

Customer: “I don’t know.”

Me: “Well, what are you interested in?”

Customer: “Hot girls.”

Me: “You mean ‘Women’s Studies’?”

Customer: “Does that have lots of girls in it?”

Me: “Pretty much all girls.”

Customer: “Awesome, I’ll do that.”

(Note: ‘Women’s Studies’ studies feminism.)

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:
 
I love that website, I have wasted literally hours on there!
 
Bohemian Nobody
Movie Theater | Durham, NC, USA

(A customer approaches the service counter.)

Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Is this the real life?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Is this just fantasy?”

Me: *catching on* “Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality.”

Customer: “D*** it! I was trying to prank you! You shouldn’t know what I’m doing!”

Me: “Doesn’t really matter to me, to meeee.”

Customer: “F*** you!” *storms off* :haha:


lol love it
 
I work in a call centre!

Me: Hello there can I speak to Mr/Mrs SURNAME please
on the end of the phone: Ill just check if he/she is in
*whispers* its for you..
*more whispers:obviously person im after* tell them im not in
On the end of the phone: he/she is not in, sorry!
 
Lol. Those are funny! Not quite as cute but I had a customer come into a restaurant I worked at once. Obviously there's a seating area. And they ask me: "Is this take-out only? Or am I allowed to sit down?" I was just like, "What?" :haha:

Then I worked at an ice-cream parlour for awhile. Had customer after customer come and be all like: "Hey, what's the bubble gum one taste like?" Or, "What's in the maple pecan ice-cream?" And it's like- "Well, I'd hope it'd taste like bubble gum. That is the idea." Or, you know, "I'm assuming it has maple and pecans.. since it's called that." Gosh! haha.
 

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