father not biological

[nicoleJOLIE]

My daughters only five months old but jw when do u think wud be a good time to tell her that her father isnt her biological father & how do i explain it to her

 

[MileyMamma]

In my opinion when she is old enough to understand, I plan on telling my daughter when she can understand the reasons why her biological father has never been a part of her life, I think its wise to wait until you think they can cope and also maybe if they ever question it themselves.

 

[IsMiseMatt]

One of my good friends raised a baby with a woman (baby wasn't his) and they went on to have 3 more kids. They didn't tell the little boy until he was 10. And as far as most people are concerned, this man is the boys bio father (I only know because he told me under the influence of alcohol on a night out last year). When they finally told him he had a better understanding and they told him nobody else knew his dad wasn't his bio father, but he could tell who he wanted. He told nobody. He said he wanted things to stay the same and he ignores the fact he has 2 dads. His biological dad doesn't exist to him, because he knows he's a jerk and doesn't want to be involved with him. So he has no false hope of his dad ever coming looking for him.
Personally, I think 10 is far too old. But these people kept it from everybody, partially due to the fact that the boys bio dad was abusive. Tell her when you think is the right time. If it were me, i'd make it known (to her) from a very early that she has a different dad. Tell her that her dad wasn't ready to be a daddy. If you leave it too late she might feel betrayed. Or in a few years time she might question why she looks different, or has different eyes or hair. She might ask if she's adopted or something silly. It'd be better to tell her than her find out for herself. Otherwise she might think you are keepingother things from her Who's surname does she have?
Anyone can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a daddy

 

[nicoleJOLIE]

thanks for the input ladies -

cianna has my surname and looks verymuch like me (just darker) and my OH is jamaican so he has pretty dark skin , so im not sure if it'll be a question just not sure how to react to it like sheldon has always been there for her *even changed her first shitty diaper* lol so i guess when the time comes ill tell her that her bio father was just not ready but daddy took the stand and will always be there for her no matter what .

 

[Amy_T]

My daughter is almost 7 and my husband is not her biological father... she was almost 2 when we met. She obviously knew something was 'different' as there are no pics of him with her as a baby etc. She knows that she didn't have a daddy with us when she was a baby, that it takes a man and a woman and these are usually who you have as a mummy and a daddy but that her daddy (my husband) didn't help make her - that he met us, fell in love with us and wanted to be her daddy. She's happy with that at the minute - I don't like to use the phrase "real dad" as, to me, to her and to everyone else my husband is her real dad, he may not have provided the sperm but he does everything a dad should do, all the important stuff.