Fed up of being made to feel guilty about formula feeding!

[aliss]

Some babies do also take the bottle more when teething, or sometimes outright refuse it. Now that he's got the white bit on his gums, his feeding is going to be a little messed up, don't worry, this is completely normal!

 

[Nic1107]

It gets much easier in time; it's quite easy to say 'just don't feel guilty then' but not always so easy to just brush off a feeling and throw it in the bin. Once you get to the weaning stage and formula isn't such a big part of your life, it'll slide into the background and you'll feel better. Hang in there!

 

[MrsRabbit]

Whatever - formula isn't a controlled product. Feed your child how you choose. As important as breastfeeding is this you must breastfeed mind set - will only discourage mothers.

 

[leoniebabey]

i agree

yes breast may be better as it has more beneifeits but ..
if your not happy or comfortable to do it the baby will pick up on that and then it wont become a good experience for either mammy or baby!

I FF have done from day 1. After the labour i had i was so drained i couldnt have even thought about breastfeeding.
LO is fine, heathy and happy! He's a very bright boy and is hitting all his milestones so im not concerned.
Noone should make us feel bad for FF
yes its great if you do breastfeed but i think people should try and see both sides of the eqation rather than just hammer into people the fact that it should be all breastfeeding.

 

[Foogirl]

Ergh yeah i know i shouldnt feel guilty - hes always been happy, content and a proper little pudding on formula but last few days hes not been so great on it - hes just guzzling ozs and ozs and though it might just be a growth spurt its making me feel like he would have been better off with me still bfing but he never settled when i was bfing and as soon as we put him on formula he was so much happier but now we having a little hic up im feeling a bit down

I doubt BFing would have necessarily made a difference. Abby's weight and intake were all over the place sometimes. Remember babies are just like us, sometimes they are hungry and sometimes they aren't. When Abby was having a hungry stage, I found it difficult to keep up sometimes. At least you always have more formula in the cupboard

Just make a mental list of all the reasons you chose to do it, all the benefits that have come from it, and throw the guilt away. It really can be that simple if you put your mind to it.

And just think about it, if FFing is soooo terrible, why would people be far more likely to tut and shake their heads at me when I fed Abby in public, than at you

 

[Eala]

Time is a great one for helping the pain/guilt go away

I will happily support any woman's choice to BF/FF, I will stand up for Mums being able to breast-feed in public, but I refuse to get behind the "breast is best" message. I do agree that breastmilk is the perfect food for a baby. I do not agree that breastfeeding is the best choice for every mother or family.

Take it steady, it does get better

 

[Eve]

Your baby is fed, and that is the main thing.

 

[Foogirl]

I do agree that breastmilk is the perfect food for a baby.

I've always thought this is a much better way to describe it. I think one of the follow-on milks is advertised using this tag line. Breastmilk is tailored to the individual baby and varies over the day and even with the temperature so of course it is the perfect food. But to say that breast feeding is the "best" way to feed your child, given all the other variables that need to be factored in, is very misleading.

 

[Eve]

I think the line should be Breast milk is best... be it from bottle or boob. lol If you can do it, I feel you should, but if you can't I do not see a reason to feel bad xx I understand how you would though... as I know I would have too.

 

[MrsRabbit]

Breast milk is NOT always the perfect food for EVERY baby. People tell me breast milk is perfect even for babies with allergies. Give me a break - I was down to turkey, rice, sweet potatoes and pears and my baby still pooped blood.

People think because it's natural it's so easy and it always works out and if it doesn't the mother simply didn't try or wasn't educated enough.

I do not feel guilty. Not one bit. I wish she didn't have a problem with her intestines but she is thriving on EleCare and I am so happy we found it.

Doesn't the WHO have a list that says breast milk from the breast is better than pumped milk, then donated milk and formula is like 4th best...so it basically tells pumping moms who do twice as much well your milk is second best. Geee and they wonder why women are so emotional about the issue.

 

[Eve]

Breast milk is NOT always the perfect food for EVERY baby. People tell me breast milk is perfect even for babies with allergies. Give me a break - I was down to turkey, rice, sweet potatoes and pears and my baby still pooped blood.

People think because it's natural it's so easy and it always works out and if it doesn't the mother simply didn't try or wasn't educated enough.

I do not feel guilty. Not one bit. I wish she didn't have a problem with her intestines but she is thriving on EleCare and I am so happy we found it.

Doesn't the WHO have a list that says breast milk from the breast is better than pumped milk, then donated milk and formula is like 4th best...so it basically tells pumping moms who do twice as much well your milk is second best. Geee and they wonder why women are so emotional about the issue.

When the term best is used... it doesn't mean every single baby from here to kingdom come will have not a single problem with it. It's meant as for most babies, breast milk is the best you can give them. Not the best for your baby, hence why formula exists and no, you shouldn't feel guilty. Breast milk is better for most babies in most conditions hence why they do use the term best.

 

[Eve]

I do not agree with formula being like 4th on a "list" though... yes, donated milk is a great thing, when done properly but you have to be very careful with that... so I would think milk from moms breast, milk mommy pumps and stores properly then formula as you still know where it came from. I am not against donating milk btw, I think it's a great thing, but in general I think for safety reasons, formula would be a better option... maybe not health wise.

 

[MrsRabbit]

I understand why they say it but they need to come up with something else. You get more flies with honey as they say.

 

[MrsRabbit]

I do not agree with formula being like 4th on a "list" though... yes, donated milk is a great thing, when done properly but you have to be very careful with that... so I would think milk from moms breast, milk mommy pumps and stores properly then formula as you still know where it came from. I am not against donating milk btw, I think it's a great thing, but in general I think for safety reasons, formula would be a better option... maybe not health wise.

I agree. I have a friend who does mom to mom milk share. I cannot imagine taking milk from someone I don't know from Adam and taking her milk and feeding it to my child. Even more so with allergies.

Then again until milk banks get cheaper most moms will have to go this way. I guess things were easier as far as sharing milk when most of your sisters, cousins etc were nursing if you needed milk.

 

[Foogirl]

I do not agree with formula being like 4th on a "list" though... yes, donated milk is a great thing, when done properly but you have to be very careful with that... so I would think milk from moms breast, milk mommy pumps and stores properly then formula as you still know where it came from. I am not against donating milk btw, I think it's a great thing, but in general I think for safety reasons, formula would be a better option... maybe not health wise.

I have no idea whether it is better than formula or not, but from what I have learned about breastmilk, it doesn't necessarily follow that milk produced for your own baby is as good for another baby. However, as far as I am aware, using the properly run milk banks don't carry any risk as it is screened before it is passed on.

 

[xemmax]

Doesn't the WHO have a list that says breast milk from the breast is better than pumped milk, then donated milk and formula is like 4th best...so it basically tells pumping moms who do twice as much well your milk is second best. Geee and they wonder why women are so emotional about the issue.

no, it isn't "telling" those mums anything of the sort, it is simply relaying facts. expressed milk is not as beneficial to a baby as milk straight from the breast. i think people have to stop interpreting such quotes as attacks when they really aren't.

 

[Foogirl]

I understand why they say it but they need to come up with something else. You get more flies with honey as they say.

I think, realistically, there is no "good" way of campaigning. Whatever they do will piss off anyone who is carrying some guilt, or who has been unable to breastfeed when they really wanted to.

Our levels are low compared to many other countries but it would seem to be more of a cultural / society thing, rather than because of any successful campain.

But, feel free to prove me wrong and come up with something which you think would encourage more people to do it, without alienating around 70% of mothers!

 

[Eve]

I am so fed up too, as I get looks of disgust, like I am a perv for breastfeeding and have friends (very few mind you) who were scared to bf their baby in pubic because of what someone might say to them It goes both ways, and I think we all need to understand that. Some places women are praised for breastfeeding and in others they are treated like poor ass pervs. Here it's a mix of both.

I think with formula companies and medical professionals so many women are under the impression that they can't breastfeed and that is a shame too. If your baby isn't a chubbalub, not gaining fast enough, if you are tired, sore or down at all you are advised to use formula when a little support and education on the matter may be all that is needed. I've been advised to start using formula instead of cows milk for K as she is 1yr (today ) and only 16lbs, but she is also only 27.5 inches tall... so she isn't thin for her size. I bought some and have been giving it to her when I want to give her a bottle and I don't mind as I know it is better than cows milk for her but she is healthy and thriving on my milk so really advising it wasn't needed... kwim? Her daddy is 125 lol... and I am only 5'1" and I was only 17inches long at birth (full term) and 5lbs 14oz. We are small people, so she is bound to be too. Anyways I've went off track some, sorry all.

Milk banks where the milk is screened is a great thing, and if you can know and trust the person you are getting the bm from that is awesome, but some women sell it privately for like 3-4$ an ounce and I personally wouldn't trust them. If I pumped (too lazy lol) I would donate my milk, and provide proper tests and screening to show I have no illness, disease or harmful substances in my milk or body, and someone willing to do that, I would trust

 

[Eve]

I agree, either facts will be misleading, or someone will be offended... can't win for loosing that is why I feel it's best to be honest and that does mean breast is best when it comes to food for a baby... again not in all but how else could it be worded without a big paragraph.?

Breast milk is the better food for a baby, unless there are underlying conditions in which formula would be the better option, or if you decide you just don't care to do it, or feel it's not for you, or your baby isn't gaining enough weight, or you are too tired, or you want to go out on the town, or you need to have surgery, or your baby has other physical problems which causes them the inability to breastfeed... the list goes on and well.... wouldn't work well on a poster lol. I do agree though, it could be worded better, but how?

 

[Lu28]

Doesn't the WHO have a list that says breast milk from the breast is better than pumped milk, then donated milk and formula is like 4th best...so it basically tells pumping moms who do twice as much well your milk is second best. Geee and they wonder why women are so emotional about the issue.

I think the list is done that way simply because there are some nutrients and enzimes which degrade over time, especially with freezing. It also takes into account the massive workload involved in pumping which most ladies, myself included, had no appreciation for before trying it myself.

I do question donated milk being third and formula fourth though as the donated milk would need to come from an extremely reliable source before I'd be comfortable with it.