rachelleigh
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Jul 27, 2011
- Messages
- 577
- Reaction score
- 0
Hi ladies... bear with me, I'm hoping that I don't get too long winded...
I am a FTM and knew from before I got pregnant that I wanted to breastfeed. Baby would be born, skin-to-skin immediately, breastfeeding as soon as possible, easy peasy, right? It never, ever dawned on me that I would have so many troubles.
DS was born Nov 22nd, long labor, 4hrs of pushing. When we tried to BF the first time he wasn't latching, kept trying throughout the day, hand expressing, trying to get him interested... he had a lot of bubbly spit coming up the first 24hrs, they figured he'd swallowed amniotic fluid and was full so not really interested in eating. A LC came by and tried to help with the latch, brought a nipple shield, still no real success.The next morning the midwife checked his suck and noticed that he was just kind of biting, chomping down, not getting his tongue out like it should be. They told me to keep trying and at that point we were feeding him expressed colostrum with a spoon. A nurse asked if I had a pump, I didn't, so she called Target and had them put one on hold for me (I love that nurse!). DH picked it up that night.
We went to the LCs at our hospital when he was two days old, the morning after we left the hospital. He still did the biting/chomping thing. They worked on positioning with me, getting him latched on, etc. and weighed him before and after a feeding. He hardly got anything at all. He had lost 8% of his body weight and they were concerned. I was instructed to pump after every feed and then use a SNS inside a nipple shield to supplement while he ate. We had an appointment the next day and he hadn't gained any weight but hadn't lost any either. We came back again a couple days later and he had gained a bit back. He still was barely drawing out any milk during a feed. We kept up with the SNS for a week but then they highly recommended that we got bottles. So we did... Breastfeed, bottle, pump, dishes, breastfeed, bottle, pump, dishes all day and all night... Those early days were harrowing. I should mention that thankfully my supply was good because of all the pumping.
We ended up seeing those LCs 10 different times. I wonder if they've ever had a patient they've seen so many times! They couldn't really give us an answer as to why he wasn't able to draw out much milk. Could be tongue tie, could be jaw issues, trauma from the birth, etc... The LC who was a Nurse Practitioner and qualified to do frenotomys diagnosed a posterior tongue tie when he was about two weeks old. It got snipped at 2.5 weeks old though we didn't see much of an improvement, if any, after. A couple weeks later we saw the same nurse along with a doctor who specialized in tongue ties and other feeding issues. She said she believed the tongue tie was corrected but referred us to an occupational therapist/feeding specialist at the Seattle Children's Hospital. Apparently this lady is like the #1 in her field... literally wrote the book on feeding disorders in infants.
By the time we got the first appointment at the Children's hosp. he was over 6 weeks old (it was awful to have to wait that long). Over the course of those weeks he developed a strong aversion to breastfeeding... nipple confusion/bottle preference/whatever you want to call it. He would scream and flail around and turn his head away... heartbreaking. He was constantly unsettled, wasn't sleeping well at night or during the day... my DH was back at work and I have no family here. It was just so, so so unbelievably hard. We did skin-to-skin all the time, I carried him in a wrap, tried feeding a little with bottle first before trying to BF, so many things... and then all the pumping, the dish washing, sleep deprivation... I kept it all up as best as I could, though there were times when I just couldn't bear to try to coax him into BF. I'd just let my DH feed him a bottle when he was home because DS would just get so, so upset. I felt totally rejected and like a complete failure.
Anyway, so we had this appointment with the specialist. She was great... but basically said that the first step is getting him back to the breast. We got the SNS again (the kind that is the soft silicone bottle that you either hold or put in your bra with the tiny tube that you tape down next to your nipple, with or without a nipple shield). We were instructed to do that for as many feeds as possible to get him "instant gratification" and start weaning him off the bottle.
Well... it sounded simple enough. He did a great feed in her office and we left with very high hopes. That was three weeks ago and our next appointment is tomorrow morning. He still dislikes BF as much as ever... I feel like I'm going to be reprimanded for not "doing my homework" or something... I just feel like I should have tried harder... It is so hard when I'm here by myself to juggle the SNS and pumping and keeping him happy and trying to stay SANE. Housework = out the window. It pains me so much every time I try to get my baby to breastfeed and he rejects it... sometimes he will latch on and occasionally even seems like he's getting an actual feed but those times are rare. I feel like there are many missed opportunities because I can't always have the stupid SNS thing on 24-7, it takes some planning and impeccable timing when dealing with a hungry baby...
I am essentially exclusively pumping. I know other women do this for various reasons and I'm so glad that it's an option... I know the important thing is that he's getting my milk and for that I am so, so grateful. But I just don't want to give up yet... is it too late?? Can I keep trying? Is he too old now, should things have already worked out?? I know his underlying feeding issues (poor suck, tongue tie, whatever the heck is going on) can't really be diagnosed and worked on unless he actually tries to breastfeed.
This has gotten so long, thank you if you've read this far. I would love to know if anyone has any successful stories of getting baby back to the breast after nipple confusion, especially at this age (9 weeks). I never imagined I would have so much trouble. I get so jealous of women that can breastfeed normally... even reading this forum sometimes makes me sad. Went to a La Leche League meeting last week and wanted to cry being surrounded by women breastfeeding while I took out my bottle... I'd endure cracked and sore and bleeding nipples if he actually wanted to breastfeed. I'm absolutely heartbroken.
Thank you for reading.
I am a FTM and knew from before I got pregnant that I wanted to breastfeed. Baby would be born, skin-to-skin immediately, breastfeeding as soon as possible, easy peasy, right? It never, ever dawned on me that I would have so many troubles.
DS was born Nov 22nd, long labor, 4hrs of pushing. When we tried to BF the first time he wasn't latching, kept trying throughout the day, hand expressing, trying to get him interested... he had a lot of bubbly spit coming up the first 24hrs, they figured he'd swallowed amniotic fluid and was full so not really interested in eating. A LC came by and tried to help with the latch, brought a nipple shield, still no real success.The next morning the midwife checked his suck and noticed that he was just kind of biting, chomping down, not getting his tongue out like it should be. They told me to keep trying and at that point we were feeding him expressed colostrum with a spoon. A nurse asked if I had a pump, I didn't, so she called Target and had them put one on hold for me (I love that nurse!). DH picked it up that night.
We went to the LCs at our hospital when he was two days old, the morning after we left the hospital. He still did the biting/chomping thing. They worked on positioning with me, getting him latched on, etc. and weighed him before and after a feeding. He hardly got anything at all. He had lost 8% of his body weight and they were concerned. I was instructed to pump after every feed and then use a SNS inside a nipple shield to supplement while he ate. We had an appointment the next day and he hadn't gained any weight but hadn't lost any either. We came back again a couple days later and he had gained a bit back. He still was barely drawing out any milk during a feed. We kept up with the SNS for a week but then they highly recommended that we got bottles. So we did... Breastfeed, bottle, pump, dishes, breastfeed, bottle, pump, dishes all day and all night... Those early days were harrowing. I should mention that thankfully my supply was good because of all the pumping.
We ended up seeing those LCs 10 different times. I wonder if they've ever had a patient they've seen so many times! They couldn't really give us an answer as to why he wasn't able to draw out much milk. Could be tongue tie, could be jaw issues, trauma from the birth, etc... The LC who was a Nurse Practitioner and qualified to do frenotomys diagnosed a posterior tongue tie when he was about two weeks old. It got snipped at 2.5 weeks old though we didn't see much of an improvement, if any, after. A couple weeks later we saw the same nurse along with a doctor who specialized in tongue ties and other feeding issues. She said she believed the tongue tie was corrected but referred us to an occupational therapist/feeding specialist at the Seattle Children's Hospital. Apparently this lady is like the #1 in her field... literally wrote the book on feeding disorders in infants.
By the time we got the first appointment at the Children's hosp. he was over 6 weeks old (it was awful to have to wait that long). Over the course of those weeks he developed a strong aversion to breastfeeding... nipple confusion/bottle preference/whatever you want to call it. He would scream and flail around and turn his head away... heartbreaking. He was constantly unsettled, wasn't sleeping well at night or during the day... my DH was back at work and I have no family here. It was just so, so so unbelievably hard. We did skin-to-skin all the time, I carried him in a wrap, tried feeding a little with bottle first before trying to BF, so many things... and then all the pumping, the dish washing, sleep deprivation... I kept it all up as best as I could, though there were times when I just couldn't bear to try to coax him into BF. I'd just let my DH feed him a bottle when he was home because DS would just get so, so upset. I felt totally rejected and like a complete failure.
Anyway, so we had this appointment with the specialist. She was great... but basically said that the first step is getting him back to the breast. We got the SNS again (the kind that is the soft silicone bottle that you either hold or put in your bra with the tiny tube that you tape down next to your nipple, with or without a nipple shield). We were instructed to do that for as many feeds as possible to get him "instant gratification" and start weaning him off the bottle.
Well... it sounded simple enough. He did a great feed in her office and we left with very high hopes. That was three weeks ago and our next appointment is tomorrow morning. He still dislikes BF as much as ever... I feel like I'm going to be reprimanded for not "doing my homework" or something... I just feel like I should have tried harder... It is so hard when I'm here by myself to juggle the SNS and pumping and keeping him happy and trying to stay SANE. Housework = out the window. It pains me so much every time I try to get my baby to breastfeed and he rejects it... sometimes he will latch on and occasionally even seems like he's getting an actual feed but those times are rare. I feel like there are many missed opportunities because I can't always have the stupid SNS thing on 24-7, it takes some planning and impeccable timing when dealing with a hungry baby...
I am essentially exclusively pumping. I know other women do this for various reasons and I'm so glad that it's an option... I know the important thing is that he's getting my milk and for that I am so, so grateful. But I just don't want to give up yet... is it too late?? Can I keep trying? Is he too old now, should things have already worked out?? I know his underlying feeding issues (poor suck, tongue tie, whatever the heck is going on) can't really be diagnosed and worked on unless he actually tries to breastfeed.
This has gotten so long, thank you if you've read this far. I would love to know if anyone has any successful stories of getting baby back to the breast after nipple confusion, especially at this age (9 weeks). I never imagined I would have so much trouble. I get so jealous of women that can breastfeed normally... even reading this forum sometimes makes me sad. Went to a La Leche League meeting last week and wanted to cry being surrounded by women breastfeeding while I took out my bottle... I'd endure cracked and sore and bleeding nipples if he actually wanted to breastfeed. I'm absolutely heartbroken.
Thank you for reading.
