Feel really guilty!! :-(

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by JennaSmith, Apr 11, 2009.

  1. JennaSmith

    JennaSmith just us the dog and fish

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    Had my 22 week scan last friday and didnt know what i was hvaing so talked OH into not asking n having another surprise bubba!
    Since having scan many ppl have said that they think its a boy and now i am secretly hoping that it is a boy, but i feel really guilty. how can i ever explain to my baby that i always wanted a boy if bubba is a girl.... i feel so stupid as its getting me really down. I know i will love my baby no matterwhat sex...
    feel im being soooo stupid n didnt wanna tell partner!!!
    :-(
     
  2. Sam_Star

    Sam_Star Mummy to a Battle Maiden

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    Aww hun your not being silly we all have secret expectations and as you said you will love bubba no matter what the sex so dont worry hun x x x x
     
  3. JennaSmith

    JennaSmith just us the dog and fish

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    Thanks sam-star. at beginnin i wasnt bothered what baby is but since every1 as said ah it looks like a boy ive got hopes of having boy so ive got one of each :-(
     
  4. babytots

    babytots Well-Known Member

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    aww hunni i feel like that i've been told this is a girl (or they *think* its a girl) and i was really hoping for a boy. since finding out i have felt so guilty as deep down it didnt matter all i really wanted was a healthy baby and she is and i feel like i have let her down somehow by not wanting her as much as i wanted a boy if that makes sense.

    try not to get too focused on what people think you are having and keep an opened mind that way you dont come attached to just one gender. with my eldest i really wanted a little girl but didnt put my heart into it. when she was born i was just in awe of her and after 5 mins the midwife interrupted me and said well are you going to see what sex she is i was so happy she was here i didnt think to look and am sure it will be the same for you. even if she was boy i would of still of felt the same.

    you'll be so in love with him/her when you first set eyes on your baby the sex wont even matter. x
     
  5. Sam_Star

    Sam_Star Mummy to a Battle Maiden

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    i kind of know what you mean i was convinced from day 1 that i was having a girl and the more i thought about it the more i wanted it!! The sex didnt really matter because of all the troubles i was having i just wanted my baby but im having a girl so i kinda got my wish lol!
     
  6. Armywife

    Armywife Mummy to 2 beauties

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    Oh i wouldn't worry sweetie! I think deep down everyone has a preference, especially when you already have one child. You won't have to explain anything to her if its a girl because you'll love her so much you'll forget you ever had these feelings.

    A little different but my hubby had his heart set on a boy and sulked a bit when we found out its a girl. I think he was secretly gutted he wasn't getting a son but now he's more than happy with his little princess.

    Big hugs to you x x x
     
  7. JennaSmith

    JennaSmith just us the dog and fish

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    Yeah i was in awe of jessi it didnt sink in she was a girl untill visitors was bringing everything pink!
    x
     
  8. PrincessSoph

    PrincessSoph Well-Known Member

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    think everyone would prefer one to the other. but once the babys born it wont even matter to you.
     
  9. babystar

    babystar Guest

    I feel the same as you although I have not had my gender scan yet..OH wants it to b a suprise too which I dont mind. However having 2 girls already I would really like a boy... as this is likely our last baby. I feel bad for really wanting a boy. And I worry that when I give birth if I secretly had my heart set on a boy and gave birth to a girl I would for a slpit second feel sad its not a boy! Arrrgh!

    :hugs:

    so now I dont know whether to find out the sex in June or not :(
     
  10. Tsia

    Tsia My MyloMan - he turned 1!

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    well if its any consolation I secretly want a girl for myself.. but want a boy for OH.. so I feel guilty a little that I would rather please OH than myself and want a girl rather than a boy.. but I will be happy with whatever.. obviously. x
     
  11. ktsl123

    ktsl123 Well-Known Member

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    I totally understand how you feel. I am afraid I may never have a girl and I have always wanted at least one. So if this one is a girl I can sit back relax and whatever comes next I am happy with.

    Then I start to think how lucky I am that I am actually lucky enough to have my own baby. It kinda humbles me and makes me think whatever I am blessed with I am meant to have and that is that. I am going to be in love with my boy or girl no matter what.
     
  12. lindypops

    lindypops Lin, Si and Eve

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    I wanted a girl for me but a boy because I know OH would have loved it - even managed to convince myself it was a boy for ages...but she's a girl! So either way I would have been happy - perhaps that's why I hedged my bets. And OH is over the moon, not bothered at all that he hasn't got his son yet.

    I bet that when your LO is born, you'll be so happy about meeting him or her that you won't think of it, or perhaps in passing, but once LO is there that's it.
     

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