Feel so stressed

[hulahoop09]

Hiya

Sorry just need to vent. Money is tight as we planned on paying catos off by july but now come april/may we may have to put lo into childcare so catos will take longer to pay off and after all bills and shopping we will be left with approx 100pm.

Anyway we are ttc but I think we are gonna struggle as I had short lp last month and this month I havent even ovd yet. Had a staff meeting at work friday, I work in a gp surgery summarising files and some admin. I work 30 hrs over 4 days and earn approx 12k per year. Well funding for certain things is gonna be cut from april so manager is looking at cutting costs etc. She was saying about she will avoid at all costs but hopefully wont have to lay staff off. Now I am a worrier and have stressed all wkend about if I get sacked. I worry about getting pg now as dont know how they would feel me taking 9 mnths smp. I am 30 this year and am happy for once where I work now and want another lo. I am the last to be employed there (started 4 1/2 yrs ago) and so OF layed off I would be tye first to go. All the women there are old enugh to be my mum and have been there a while and some over 15 yrs so Im a goner if anything! Feel like crying

Xx

 

[hulahoop09]

Manager wasnt too happy with amount of sick days taken this year so far and saying anyone taken on infuture would only receive ssp and went mad as some staff text in to say off sick. Not me, I called everyday wk before last when was of sick to keep updated that hadnt had results from docs yet etc. She also said to me my job role will likely change by the sounds of it to support reception more etc as they arebehind with work due to staff been off and someone off long term. Xx

 

[daneuse27]

If you're very stressed out, maybe you could hold off on TTC (not saying you should, just an idea) until the bill you want gone is paid off. Going through a pregnancy stressed out isn't fun, you want to be able to soak up all the enjoyment of it without having to worry so much.

 

[hulahoop09]

I dont think I am gonna get pg anyway tbh. The bill isnt worrying me too much as wprst case will be paod by end of yr/start of nxt. I think the main thing for me is after the meeting at work on thurs and I always overstress I guess. When was pg with lo as i have tokophobia the first approx 5-6 mnths were v.stressful til I got my c section date. Lol. Xx

 

[hulahoop09]

Not sure if to have a chat with my managerthis wk. Only I do.my job and so.when i was on ml a receptionist had to do it here and there. Not sure if to explain.was hoping to get pg this year as I am getting older, I wanna have my family complete and settle into life properly, enjoy hols etc but I.cant afford to lose my job so if me getting pg may put them in awkward position then maybe I need to hold off ttc? Its really stressing me now and I jist keep wanting to cry!

 

[daneuse27]

How long before you find out about work? is it possible to hold off until you know for sure and then decide?

 

[hulahoop09]

Well spoke to assistant manager and she basically said as it stands tge manager worded it a bit wrongky. They dont know for certain figures of cutbacks but as it stands no one will lose their job and worst case scenario would be people reapplying and i would end up with a more interesting job. Lol. She said as for having baboes she said I am a woman and am entitked to have children and that they coukdnt get rid of me because of pregnancy as it is against the law and said go get pg when I want! Lol. The cutbacks as they stand will be made on facilities etc and that one of the docs will be watching over everything as she likes to keep strict on cash. Basically we wont get a payrise or cost of living rise this yr but I never expect that anyway so the yrs we have its a bonus! Lol. I will be shown yo do more admin also.

 

[daneuse27]

Thats good to hear! Im glad you will get to keep your job and have another child too if thats what you want

 

[hulahoop09]

Thanks hun! I seem to catastrophise everything which sometimes helps if the worst happens but generally things dont turn out as bad as I plan and so I worry over nothing!!