Feel terrible, but I hate my husband's old dog!

[Skywalker]

My husband's dog is about 14 years old and he's owned him all this time, so obviously hey have a very deep bond and this dog is family to him. To me, I just met this dog in his later years when he's going deaf, blind, sometimes can't use his back legs, has gross fatty tumors all over him, is constantly oily and smelly, has TERRIBLE breath, steals my son's food right out of his hands when he thinks no one is looking, constantly runs in his sleep so kicks the door to our bedrooms when he sleeps so we literally have to create a barricade to keep him away from the door EVERY night. He is honestly the biggest, grossest pain in the ass, and I normally love animals, especially dogs. I feel terrible saying this but I find myself praying that he just will die already, but I know it would be so hard for my husband to let go of him after all these years. He can't have much longer left, but however long it is, it's too long for me! Literally anywhere I walk in the house, he walks like an inch in front of me verrrrrry slowly and then just randomly stops, he's constantly licking my toes with his disgusting smelly tongue, he regularly gags and it makes me gag, he sheds all over everything and his hair is practically a condiment at our house now, and the sound of him bathing himself almost makes me puke. What's worse is I don't want him anywhere near my newborn once he or she comes because he's already not trustworthy around my son! Ugh, and I know my husband would never consider putting him down because even with all the things I just mentioned, he's not in that bad of health or at least it doesn't seem to bother him. Me on the other hand, I want to freaking put this dog down yesterday, and the further along I get, the more nauseas I get, the less patience I have for this dog. UGH! Anyone else in a similar situation?

 

[DillyDaffodil]

No. I love my dog.

 

[Skywalker]

No. I love my dog.

Well, that's good. As I said, I normally love dogs, I've owned many. However, It's hard to meet a dog who is old, decrepit and who smells terrible and feel very much affinity for it at all in the same way as you might if you get to know a dog and form a bond from an earlier age. I'm going to guess that you didn't meet your dog as a very, very elderly dog and that you've had it for a while. I'm pregnant and my sense of smell is through the roof as is my nausea so having this very smelly dog around constantly is not pleasant and I do t have the benefit of knowing this dog it's whole life like my husband does, all I know is his version of him. So, thanks for letting me know you love your dog, I'm guessing that was to sort of make me feel guilty for hating my husbands dog, which I already do, but I can't help it and just needed to rant. By the way, I still regularly bathe, walk and feed his dog and I do t let my personal feelings towards him cause me to neglect him, I just find him incredibly irritating to live with. Anyway, that's my rant.

 

[kittylady]

I do think pregnancy hormones make things seem a lot worse than they are. I have a lot less patience for things when I'm pregnant and things just irritate me more. I don't think its necessarily your a horrible person and I guess you've said it here because that way you can get it out without hurting your husbands feelings. Like you said your husband wont get rid of the dog and it would be unfair to get rid of him.

My cats steal food of the kids plate if they get a chance so we feed them and shut them in the kitchen at mealtimes until we've finished. Can you make a permanent barrier or an area for him so that he isn't constantly under your feet? I think you at least need to discuss sensitively with your husband that if you trip over him then you could have a fall and that could be serious, better to make him a nice comfortable area where he can be happy but you can not constantly feel like your about to fall over.

The smell will be much worse. I've been obsessed with a funny smell in the fridge that no one else can smell. It made my morning sickness terrible.

I hope you can sort this out. x

 

[kittylady]

No. I love my dog.

Not really helpful.

 

[medic76097]

No. I love my dog.

Not really helpful.

But it's honest. Not everyone hates animals. Least of all, one that means so much to a partner. Obviously the dog was there long long before any partners......

 

[Holliems]

I don't understand why some people have to be so judgy. It's not like Skywalker is abusing the dog. Its old, gross, and a lot to deal with right now. It is what it is and she needed a rant.

Sky, my ex had a dog that lived to be 20. It had no teeth, no hair, and she was stinky and grumpy. You may still have a ways to go.

 

[6lilpigs]

He sounds like he is driving you nuts Maybe when LO gets here he can have some separate areas hat can be kept a little more hair and smell free?

 

[DillyDaffodil]

I'm sorry if I sounded judgy. That was not my ambition. I just don't empathize. My dog is a rescue dog. She looks funny, she acts weird, can be totally annoying and out of control. But she is a living thing under my charge. I signed up for this and it's my responsibility.

That being said - there is a lot you can do to curb bad behavior or bodily issues. Have you talked to your vet? Something like a melatonin supplement might help him sleep better at night. There are also plugin pheromone diffusers that help calm dogs as well.

Additionally, he might just have a ton of extra energy! Hire a dog walker if you can to get him out of the house and burning up energy so he will take a good long snooze afterward.

As medic said, the dog likely means the world to your husband. If he means the world to you, it seems like it should be worth it to try to find ways to make it work.

 

[Skywalker]

No. I love my dog.

Not really helpful.

But it's honest. Not everyone hates animals. Least of all, one that means so much to a partner. Obviously the dog was there long long before any partners......

Wow. I did not say I hate animals. I love animals, I worked as a vet tech and in shelters and regularly take care of my across the street neighbors dogs when hey go out of town as well as babysit my friend's two puppies and three cats at my own house when she needs it, like when she had to get her house tented for termites recently. I feel like you girls are being massively unfair to me and not even reading what I wrote. I said I love dogs, and hat I understand that this dog means the world to my husband and that I feel TERRIBLE feeling this way about this dog, but it doesn't change the fact that I do, and that I wanted a place to vent. But obviously I'm just a mean animal hater who doesn't care about my husbands feelings, so criticize away. Thank you for the other replies which haven't been so judgemental and were actually helpful and making suggestions instead of just treating me like I'm a horrible person!

 

[Skywalker]

I'm sorry if I sounded judgy. That was not my ambition. I just don't empathize. My dog is a rescue dog. She looks funny, she acts weird, can be totally annoying and out of control. But she is a living thing under my charge. I signed up for this and it's my responsibility.

That being said - there is a lot you can do to curb bad behavior or bodily issues. Have you talked to your vet? Something like a melatonin supplement might help him sleep better at night. There are also plugin pheromone diffusers that help calm dogs as well.

Additionally, he might just have a ton of extra energy! Hire a dog walker if you can to get him out of the house and burning up energy so he will take a good long snooze afterward.

As medic said, the dog likely means the world to your husband. If he means the world to you, it seems like it should be worth it to try to find ways to make it work.

I understand, but YOU chose your dog. You signed up for it, like you said. Me on the other hand, I got this dog whether I like it or not. I'm the one that got him vitamin powder for his food, give him glucosamine for his hips, brush and bathe him. At this age, all the vet says is she's happy he's alive. We do everything we can to make him comfortable. I have owned multiple rescue dogs who weren't traditionally thought of as "cute" and had their own issues which I DID sign up for. I didn't sign up for this dog and I treat him as best as I'm able which is probably better than some people who DO love their dogs do, so please don't confuse me saying this dog irritates me while I'm pregnant as me being an unfeeling animal hater who doesn't empathize with this dog. If I didn't, I would t massage his hips in warm baths to try to help him. I just did not sign up for this and I don't like having this dog around no matter how much I've tried to like him. But I still understand he is a reliant animal who needs our help, so I give it to him.

 

[corgankidd]

Haha, Im sorry but I thought your post was hilarious, just because I can imagine everything you are saying and have been there before! I rescued a 12 year old dog from the pound thinking he'd live out the last months or year of his life in a nice home....that dog went on to live 4 more years! He was a super smelly, drooly, could barely walk Labrador with toenails that grew out of control and sounded like somebody hammering on the floor with every step. He also leaked urine and sometimes feces :/
My solution was I took him to petsmart (I don't know where you are but hopefully you have a petsmart or something like it around) and gave him a bath weekly, I bought toenail clippers and cut his nails weekly until the quick started receding back and his nails became a normal length, I got him a diaper to wear around the house, and I regularly brushed his teeth.
Your husband may love his dog but he also needs to make sure he is doing whatever he can to make his wife comfortable as well. Talk to your husband and tell him he has to start washing his dog regularly and brushing his teeth! As far as running in his sleep, can you just get him a big dog bed, one that has bolsters on the sides, so when he runs he kicks the bed and not your door?
As far as taking food from your kid, that's just a dog thing. My dogs are ALWAYS trying to get a free meal when the opportunity presents itself.

 

[Just1more2]

Even before I was pregnant, I disliked old dogs for all of the reasons you stated. I would pat, but never solicit attention from friend's or families old dogs. I agree that they are smelly, oily and lumpy.

This being said, I love love love dogs. I have a 2 year old aussie myself and I will love her when she is old and smelly, but she is mine and I have had her since she was 10weeks old.

I am very empathetic to your feelings and understand the need to rant. In my opinion it would be a lot like SUDDENLY having an incredibly old man (I do not hate old people) that cannot care for himself well living with you against your wishes.

Express your feelings gently to hubby. Tell him that you understand his feelings toward the dog, but that he makes you uncomfortable. As PPs said, perhaps you could set up a dog-free zone for you and baby to use when you need a break?

 

[hanni]

I can see why you'd be so irritated by the dog! I would be too. Sounds like hard work.

Even thinking about the smell makes me nauseous.

 

[Skywalker]

Haha, Im sorry but I thought your post was hilarious, just because I can imagine everything you are saying and have been there before! I rescued a 12 year old dog from the pound thinking he'd live out the last months or year of his life in a nice home....that dog went on to live 4 more years! He was a super smelly, drooly, could barely walk Labrador with toenails that grew out of control and sounded like somebody hammering on the floor with every step. He also leaked urine and sometimes feces :/
My solution was I took him to petsmart (I don't know where you are but hopefully you have a petsmart or something like it around) and gave him a bath weekly, I bought toenail clippers and cut his nails weekly until the quick started receding back and his nails became a normal length, I got him a diaper to wear around the house, and I regularly brushed his teeth.
Your husband may love his dog but he also needs to make sure he is doing whatever he can to make his wife comfortable as well. Talk to your husband and tell him he has to start washing his dog regularly and brushing his teeth! As far as running in his sleep, can you just get him a big dog bed, one that has bolsters on the sides, so when he runs he kicks the bed and not your door?
As far as taking food from your kid, that's just a dog thing. My dogs are ALWAYS trying to get a free meal when the opportunity presents itself.

Thanks for your post! I realize I may be a lot more sensitive than usual as is probably every other woman on these boards so I didn't mean to be snappy in response to anyone being snappy and didn't even intend to start a post that would make anyone snappy lol, I guess it's a sensitive subject to take up with a bunch of sensitive pregnant women. I just needed to rant, and got hung up on a few of the more judgemental posts, but the majority of posts have been supportive and understanding and helpful, like yours! Yes, I'm going to talk to him - I did about the door kicking and so we set up the nightly barricade, and I think he had a dog bed that he never used but hey may like one now that he's older. The dog didn't bother me half as much before I was pregnant, I just more or less tolerated him. Now my patience for his gulping sounds as he bathes himself many times a day and then chokes and gags on his hair is like nothing. I don't even like to kiss my own husband who I love more than the universe itself with tongue right now because it makes me nauseas. So I'm just touchy I guess, but it's a good idea to talk to him to see what measures we can additionally take to mitigate some of these irritating things. Thanks for your post

 

[suspectpink]

I completely understand why you needed a rant at the moment any smell is driving me up the wall .... even my lavender plug in 😷 my absolute star of a Dad smokes (outside obviously ) but oh my god I can't bare the smell of him .... I love him dearly but he's pretty much the equivalent to your husbands dog ... in the nicest way possible ... my cat is 14 I've had him since he was 8 weeks but he's gone a little crazy in his old age and wakes us up more than a newborn will in the night ! .... this forum should be a safe place for us to be able to rant without the fear of being judged ! Xx we might feel better after the crazy hormones of first Tri settle down a bit ... fingers crossed xxxx

 

[3babesforme]

i can understand why you'd need to vent about it. but i can't say i can relate. good luck!

 

[Buffyx]

I thought your post was hilarious too, because it reminded me of a family friends old dog. I can just picture it so well.

I must say, I am a huge animal lover. I have 2 dogs and a cat - and I can see your need to rant about this. My cat has really bad skin issues. He scratches and bites himself until huge chunks are taken out of his skin and fur. He's only 3. We have had different medicine, he's worn a cone for months, and a jacket. And we have had steroid injections given to him, but nothing works. But it didn't bother me too much, until I was pregnant with my DD. Then I just found myself getting so irritated at him for doing it. The sound of him doing it. And his fur would be everywhere. And after he had sat somewhere, there would be blood.

Hopefully you can have a chat with your husband & come to some sort of agreement on how to deal with the dog.

 

[Linzalora]

Bless you! Sounds like quite a predicament. I agree, hubby'd better get on board to help with Ol' Yeller! For your safety and the dog's, it would be good if he was cordoned off from like the kitchen or laundry room especially. My house has a no pets allowed policy for meal times, and that might help with the food snatching, prevent less hair from being part of meals, and keep the pervasive smell away for a little while. If the puppy gets fed elsewhere while the humans are fed, he won't feel neglected when he smells dinner in the air.

Good luck with the dog, and H&H pregnancy to you!

 

[KayKe]

My situation is a bit different. But I can so relate!

I do not have pets, but my mum has two dogs (labrador and a vizla) and sometimes I have to look after them.

Like this weekend she asked me to look after them as she needs a break from all the dog walking and wants a decent night sleep. I can understand that, that with dogs there is no such things as lie in.

But, I HATE having them in the house. I have two boys aged 8 and 6 (anyone who has kids can relate: endless washing, endless mess, endless cooking, homework, cleaning, mummy this, mummy that).
Plus I work full time, very wicked hours. I also am a tidy person, who likes cleanliness, so I like to wash floors regularly, tidy up in general...

My house is not made for big dogs. Its white - now more like grey, with them in. There is dirt all over my newly washed floors. Both dogs are super active and need constant attention. Vizla is still 10 months old, so super hyper active and not trained (she eats everything she finds: food, slippers, wooden decors). They can't really be left alone for long periods. And I do not have a dog room, where they can stay or be washed after walks to dry up (so ALL the dirt ends up all over the house).
I hate it!!!

Plus i have a beautiful velvet sofa, which was one of those things I really wanted to get for myself - now its covered in dog hair and is all dirty (my mum allows dogs to stay on her sofas), so, obviously, when no one sees- they get on ours too...

So, all in all, I think its the last time I get the dogs.

Funny things is, I replay like animals. Just not in my house! Because it is just another thing I must do and worry about. And, I have really enough on my plate right now.

So hugs and keep strong.