Feeling really down today, need a kick up the bottom please

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by Misstink, Jun 6, 2011.

  1. Misstink

    Misstink Well-Known Member

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    Basically im petrified, i keep reading about how most women miscarry their first pregnancy, well this is my first and im also 37 and today im feeling so down, i just cant stop crying!! People just dont seem to realise how scared i am already and all i keep hearing is, "you want to be careful at your age you know", "has your doctor gone through all the risks with you", the worst one was my sister, when i rang to tell her she said to me "youre not going to tell anyone else are you, like announce it on facebook or anything because if something goes wrong then youre the one who will have to tell everybody"!!
    How can i relax and enjoy being pregnant, after 3 and a half years of trying, when all i hear are negative comments?!
    Have any of you ladies been through the same thing and how did you get through it?!
    :cry:
    xxxxxxx
     
  2. Nikki1120

    Nikki1120 Mum to Hollie and Max :D

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    My step mum is pregnant and she's 42, she's just hit 14 weeks and everything is as fine as can be, even better results than me for down syndrome (of which i'm a little jealous :D) my mum had my sister at 45, she was perfect too, it's just a slight risk of something like 2%, don't listen to people hun and enjoy being pregnant! It's your first baby and don't let these people wreck your expirience, you'll be fine! x
     
  3. poppy666

    poppy666 My family Complete x

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    Ahhh sweetie try ignore negative comments, i have 4 children atm and my last LO is 14mths i concieved him at 39.. concieved this one a week before my 41st birthday and everything going great.

    We all get scared in 1st Tri young or older dont mean we are higher risk its just something that happens and nothing we can do to prevent it, so try relax :hugs:
     
  4. Cassie10

    Cassie10 WTT After Loss

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    I'm sorry you're having such a bad day hun! :( I didn't go through the exact same thing but I def had the same fears! I was terrified of having a miscarriage especially since I found out so early. Everyone I told was soooo excited and I was as well but I wouldn't let myself completely be excited because I knew all the statistics. Don't let what anyone says bring you down...I'm sure they are just being cautious. It's hard to relax but it really is best to just try to clear your mind and enjoy the little miracle that is happening! One of my problems was I was always online googling what was going on and all the statistics and bad things that could happen...so def stay away from that!! I thought I was just preparing myself for what could happen but I was just going crazy with worry. Go do something relaxing for yourself...wether it's reading a book or shopping (this always helps me!). If you need to talk def message me and I'll try my best to keep your mind off of it! :hugs:
     
  5. nicb26

    nicb26 Well-Known Member

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    Hi hun, congratulations on your pregnancy!

    Firstly, although sadly miscarriage is common, it's not true that most women miscarry their first, you have a great chance that everything will be fine. I can totally relate to your worry though, unfortunately I have had a loss, and it's hard to envisage everything going well, so I do sympathize with the worry. A lot of women on here are exactly the same too. It is hard not to worry about every little thing, but just try to take lots of rest and relax as much as you can.

    I'm sorry your family and friends haven't been more supportive. Perhaps try explaining how their comments make you feel, they likely don't even realize they are being so insensitive.

    Good luck, wishing you a happy and healthy 9 months x
     
  6. Misstink

    Misstink Well-Known Member

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    Awwww thankyou so much for taking the time to reply, it means so much to me!! I just dont know whats wrong with me today, I cant stop thinking about my mam (she died when i was 10), my 3 really good friends seem to have dropped me since i told them i was pregnant, i live abroad, i have no family out here, my oh works 5 days a week, (i work from home) so im always on my own, im struggling to eat because of ms, my bras dont fit me anymore and i have really bad toothache, Oh Gawd, im just feeling so sorry for myself, add peoples insensitive comments on top of that and i just feel like curling into a little ball and crying my eyes out!!!:cry:
    Its fantastic to hear that a lot of you or people you know have had babies later in life and carried full term, that really does make me feel a lot better!!
    Thankyou so much!!:thumbup:
    xxxxxxx
     
  7. Misstink

    Misstink Well-Known Member

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    Booooooooooo to all you read and runners!!:cry:
     
  8. Sarah24

    Sarah24 Mummy to Finley

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    How insensitive!!!! But feel safe in the fact that we've all been through that panic stage. Best advice would be to be selective on the threads you see on here, they can freak you even more. NEVER google symptoms it'll drive you nuts! Just take care of yourself and so everything they tell you to do. Besides the obvious that after all that time, you're pregnant!! Congratulations to you : D xxxxx
     
  9. Lulu1982

    Lulu1982 Well-Known Member

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    Congratulations Misstink!

    Just to reassure you ... I am 28 and feel exactly the same! Everytime I feel a twinge I think somethings wrong and every time I nip to the loo I expect the worse.

    I keep reading that everyone feels the same, especially with their first but I still don't seem to be able to believe it!

    My sister had one of my nephews at 43 ... no complications, completely healthy, easy labour etc

    My sister in law also had my youngest nephew when she was 41 ... the same, no problems at all! :D

    I'm currently freaking out as my BMI is 34 and I feel sure that I'll be told off at my first appointment :(

    I hope you're feeling better really soon! The best bit of advice I've been given is not to google, it really can drive you insane!!xx
     
  10. Lulu1982

    Lulu1982 Well-Known Member

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    Ooops! Cross posted!
     
  11. shazland

    shazland Well-Known Member

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    My sister gave birth to a gorgeous little girl at 43! Try not to worry too much. :)
     
  12. diapermomma11

    diapermomma11 Well-Known Member

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    congrats :) and I think its normal for everyone to feel like the worst thing possible could happen not everyone miscarries their first pregnancy just keep happy thoughts and everything will be okay. How many weeks are you?
     
  13. Mummy of Ange

    Mummy of Ange Well-Known Member

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    Aww hun, i know exactly how you feel.

    Im 32 and this is my second pregnancy. I lost my twins at 23 weeks due to a water infection so this time round im completely terrified.

    For all the bad stories you read about miscarriages, also look at all the people that are having babies everyday. Try to focus on the positives rather than the negatives.

    I will be totally honest, i dont think i have ever been so petrified of anything in my life. I keep thinking "what if i go into premature labour again".

    I am taking the view that it is out of my hands, and what will be will be. My boys were too precious for this world, but i know they have sent mummy and daddy a brother or sister.

    xxxx
     

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