First Time

annalee2003

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Hi everyone. :)

First off, let me just express how happy I am that I found this awesome forum. I really thought I'd have to go through this all alone again, but it looks like I really don't.

My husband and I had our first miscarriage just last week. It was and still is a bit of a shock, but we're both taking everything day by day.

We have always talked about starting a family, but the talks got pretty serious once he left for deployment about a year ago. We tried when he came home on R&R back in April, but two weeks wasnt long enough for anyting to stick. We tried again once he officialy returned in July, and in September on vacation in CA visiting family and friends, something finally stuck! The first week of October when we finally got back home, I took a test and it came out positive. :) We were ecstatic!

Last week though, everything came to a sudden halt. It started with light bleeding on Wednesday morning, which I thought was just from having sex that previous night. The bleeding got a bit heavier as the day went on, but still, I thought (really hoped) it was nothing. By Thursday evening nothing had slowed down or stopped, so we went to ER that night.

We went in, I explained my situation, and they did the normal check-up routine, took a urine sample, told me to go home and said they'd call me at some point the next day (.. really? :growlmad:)

By Friday afternoon, no one had called me, so I called the OB/GYN Advice nurse and someone finally made an appointment for me to be seen that day. Of course, by that time, I already knew what had happened. I had bled a whole lot, had bad cramping and had passed a good bit of clots ... This definitely wasnt normal.
A tiny part still had a glimmer of hope though. Maybe the baby was alright? Maybe, by some slim chance, everything was fine.
My appointment confirmed my worst fears, though. I had had a miscarriage, and there was nothing that they or we could do.

My husband and I were both devastated. How could something like this just happen out of nowhere? This couldn't be possible. We had both done everything right and everything by the book. But it sadly was ..

We're still both processing all of this, but amazingly enough, each day does get a tiny bit better. Each day is just one step closer to us being able to try this all over again.

So, that's my story. Thank you for sticking through it, and I apologize for it being so long. I've talked to friends and family about all of this, but no one I know has ever gone through anything like this .. And I feel like they don't really understand.

Thanks for reading. :)
 
I'm so sorry for your loss and all that you are going through. This site has brought me much comfort and support during my MC, just over a month ago at 7 weeks pg. I am glad that for you day by day you seem to be feeling better, I hope that continues. And hope you and your dh are blessed with a sticky bean soon. Best wishes to you both!
 
Thank you TaraLynn :hugs:

I guess I should also mention that I was at the 11 week mark when it happened. My husband and I were going to her the baby's heartbeat at the next appointment just a day before Thanksgiving ... It felt like a stab in the heart when my doctor said, "I'll just go ahead and cancel that appointment".
I am a mix of emotions right now, but like I mentioned before, every day does get a tiny bit better.
 
I am so sorry for the loss of your tiny one. It does get a little easier every day but I am also sure that you will never forget - just give yourself time to grieve and to be sad. It's a horrible, horrible thing to have to go through.

xx
 
So sorry for your loss :hugs: It is truly devastating. I lost our first at 10 weeks, 2nd one at 12 weeks. It really felt like we were so near, but so far if you see what I mean. You do sound like you are holding it together fairly well but it is such a hard thing to go through and really hard when no one close to you understands. I've never felt so lonely in all my life and spent a lot of time being really angry about the whole thing. It does get better day by day but sometimes it comes back to bite you when you least expect it...but there's always someone around here who'll understand xx
 
I'm so sorry for your loss. I miscarried a little over a week ago, and I know what a painful thing it is to go through. I hope that you and your husband will heal quickly.
 

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