helen1234
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- Jun 7, 2008
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my admissions to be blonde
1. yes i did crash my moped looking in the co-op window at myself singing salon selective song, crashed into back of a car. cutting my leg, i was going for a perm although i have curly hair.
2. while in hospital after the crash i was looking out the window and saw a herd of cows out the window, i shouted the nurses and the cows disapeared they thought i was hallucinating and put me in a side room, they later found out they'd escaped from the farm next door.
3. i died my hair black and it went green when i was 16, ruined my mums best towels
4. i got suspended from school for playing truant.
5. i wore a knitted mohair jumper for the end of school disco (prom) cos a few certain people told me it was trendy.
6. i sold something of my cheating ex and ran off with the money shared it with some friends and went off on a drinking bender. to get him back haha.
7. i met someone got engaged and divorced in 1 yr when i was 21, there is more to that but cant write it on here.
8. i stole a tree from selston golf course and used it as a xmas tree.
9. i set fire to a mans chest with a lighter in a night club on his stag do, (it stank).
10. i tipped ice down someones top from a wine cooler in blackpool but the ice was melted lol (sorry nic) x
11. i flashed my boobs out of a blackpool hotel window (nic did too),
12. i've been burgled 3 times but only once had something pinched.
13. i had a dog food fight when drunk with one certain person, and it was in someone elses house.
14. i climbed up a stage at a nightclub performance act to get a light from the fire breather and nearly got thrown out the club.
15. i got so drunk on vodka by accident i stood on my front doorstep to get fresh air fell face forward into the grass and had to be helped into the house and put into bed by my next door neighbour,(hence i dont drink vodka anymore only to get trolleyed.)
16. i went to a job interview last yr but got petrol all over me 10 mins before the interview and didnt have time to go and change and to top it off i forgot my purse and had to give my address etc to the kiosk woman and if things werent bad enough when i pulled out the junction and had petrol on my shoes and my foot slipped off the clutch and flew into the middle of the road stalled the car nearly causing a crash. i apologised to the interviewer about stinking of petrol and found it funny and gave me the job.
17. in june 2007 to april 2008 i had about 10 job as i didnt like them for one reason or another.
18 . i thought roe caviar was fish sperm
19. i thought euro tunnel went to ireland
20. went for the wknd in dublin on the flight just before we took off i glued my false nail back on and stunk the whole plane out with super glue.
21. i thought cardiff was in scotland and carlisle in wales
22. when i went on hol a few yrs ago i got a trip mixed up and instead of going on the catalan senation choclate tsting trip i ticked the wrong box catermaran sensation trip and ended up on a bloody sailing boat with a net a foot above the sea (i've never been so scared in my whole life i tell ya) it sailed into the middle of nowhere in the ocean with a load of german weirdo's, trying to keep myself to myself with rosie intow they had a bbq on this boat, rosie had a plate of rice and alot of ketchup and as we sat at the front of the boat a gust of wind blew the plate out of her hand covering a load of germans at the back of the boat with the contents of her plate.
23. i went for a walk on the same holiday only to get caught in a rainstorm as we walked up this long road it started flooding, rosie said "why can i smell poo" yes it was the drains over flowing we only had flip flops on. nice....
24. same holiday rosie went to the shop bought a lilo everyone was pointing at her laughing so told her to come out the pool and gave a lecture to her to behave as swimming pools can be dangerous etc etc. anyway caught glance at her lilo and it haddevils all over it in very rude positions hence she spent the next week playing on the water on a giant mobile phone.
25. think my worst stupid thing was breaking my ankle and toes on my 1st lesson of tae kwondo oops. don't ask me how i have no idea lol
oh and rosie had a halloween party but the kids went a bit mental with my e numbered green coloured fairy cakes and ended up in the back garden playing football i sent them home all covered in mud as they stared rolling around int he grass, they just ignored me when i said stoppit lol. we dont do at home parties anymore.
i swear disaster follows me lol
1. yes i did crash my moped looking in the co-op window at myself singing salon selective song, crashed into back of a car. cutting my leg, i was going for a perm although i have curly hair.
2. while in hospital after the crash i was looking out the window and saw a herd of cows out the window, i shouted the nurses and the cows disapeared they thought i was hallucinating and put me in a side room, they later found out they'd escaped from the farm next door.
3. i died my hair black and it went green when i was 16, ruined my mums best towels
4. i got suspended from school for playing truant.
5. i wore a knitted mohair jumper for the end of school disco (prom) cos a few certain people told me it was trendy.
6. i sold something of my cheating ex and ran off with the money shared it with some friends and went off on a drinking bender. to get him back haha.
7. i met someone got engaged and divorced in 1 yr when i was 21, there is more to that but cant write it on here.
8. i stole a tree from selston golf course and used it as a xmas tree.
9. i set fire to a mans chest with a lighter in a night club on his stag do, (it stank).
10. i tipped ice down someones top from a wine cooler in blackpool but the ice was melted lol (sorry nic) x
11. i flashed my boobs out of a blackpool hotel window (nic did too),
12. i've been burgled 3 times but only once had something pinched.
13. i had a dog food fight when drunk with one certain person, and it was in someone elses house.
14. i climbed up a stage at a nightclub performance act to get a light from the fire breather and nearly got thrown out the club.
15. i got so drunk on vodka by accident i stood on my front doorstep to get fresh air fell face forward into the grass and had to be helped into the house and put into bed by my next door neighbour,(hence i dont drink vodka anymore only to get trolleyed.)
16. i went to a job interview last yr but got petrol all over me 10 mins before the interview and didnt have time to go and change and to top it off i forgot my purse and had to give my address etc to the kiosk woman and if things werent bad enough when i pulled out the junction and had petrol on my shoes and my foot slipped off the clutch and flew into the middle of the road stalled the car nearly causing a crash. i apologised to the interviewer about stinking of petrol and found it funny and gave me the job.
17. in june 2007 to april 2008 i had about 10 job as i didnt like them for one reason or another.
18 . i thought roe caviar was fish sperm
19. i thought euro tunnel went to ireland
20. went for the wknd in dublin on the flight just before we took off i glued my false nail back on and stunk the whole plane out with super glue.
21. i thought cardiff was in scotland and carlisle in wales
22. when i went on hol a few yrs ago i got a trip mixed up and instead of going on the catalan senation choclate tsting trip i ticked the wrong box catermaran sensation trip and ended up on a bloody sailing boat with a net a foot above the sea (i've never been so scared in my whole life i tell ya) it sailed into the middle of nowhere in the ocean with a load of german weirdo's, trying to keep myself to myself with rosie intow they had a bbq on this boat, rosie had a plate of rice and alot of ketchup and as we sat at the front of the boat a gust of wind blew the plate out of her hand covering a load of germans at the back of the boat with the contents of her plate.
23. i went for a walk on the same holiday only to get caught in a rainstorm as we walked up this long road it started flooding, rosie said "why can i smell poo" yes it was the drains over flowing we only had flip flops on. nice....
24. same holiday rosie went to the shop bought a lilo everyone was pointing at her laughing so told her to come out the pool and gave a lecture to her to behave as swimming pools can be dangerous etc etc. anyway caught glance at her lilo and it haddevils all over it in very rude positions hence she spent the next week playing on the water on a giant mobile phone.
25. think my worst stupid thing was breaking my ankle and toes on my 1st lesson of tae kwondo oops. don't ask me how i have no idea lol
oh and rosie had a halloween party but the kids went a bit mental with my e numbered green coloured fairy cakes and ended up in the back garden playing football i sent them home all covered in mud as they stared rolling around int he grass, they just ignored me when i said stoppit lol. we dont do at home parties anymore.
i swear disaster follows me lol
