Friends....rant.

[LouOscar01]

Went to see my friends tonight, haven't seen them in a while because we are all busy with jobs, but we were friends at school. Can't believe how different we are now....they are focused on diets/jobs/partying/make up etc and I'm interested in babies and getting married!!! Didn't know what to talk about. At 23 I'm younger than most who get uber broody....but they don't feel a thing! One said to me 'it's embarrassing how broody you are' and then I got all the 'you are too young, live a bit first'.... they don't understand that all I do is think about having children and that I see that as 'living'. I don't get the whole 'life finishes once you've had children'....that's when it's going to start.
I found it quite offensive as though they think I haven't thought about the fact that having a child is a big commitment. They were acting as though it was just a whim and that I was irresponsible to want it at this age.

Thank goodness my best friend is as broody as I am! I'd be lost without her!

Grrrrrrr. Rant over.

 

[GingerPanda]

Sorry to pop in, love, since I'm not WTT... but I saw your thread while I was browsing forums and had to reply.

I got married when I was 19, and we started TTC when I was 23. I always felt like I was on a completely different page with my friends from school, because... well, like you said, they were worried about partying. They would call me complaining because their parents wouldn't send them more money for food, and my response would be "Well, maybe you shouldn't have spent it all on clothes and tattoos and beer. Why don't you get a job?"

Anyway, I have found that the solution is generally to make older friends. In my BnB circle, pretty much all my ladies are 30+. I feel like I identify with them better!


In short, I totally understand how you feel. You're not weird. You're just mature.

 

[SoBroody91]

Yes, I completely get this! I'm 22 and most of my friends are all 21/22 and most of them are at or just finished uni and we're living complete different lives! It is nice to see them and have the odd night out, but they're lives seem to revolve around partying! Apparently I'm 'old' because I'm one of the few that's settled down, but I'm also 'too young' to be thinking about babies. You can't win!

 

[LouOscar01]

Ah glad I'm not the only one. It's very irritating!!!!!

 

[EstelSeren]

I kind of understand where you're coming from, though I didn't get it from my friends/ acquaintances so much as we all seemed to be settling down at the same time!

I met my husband at 18, got engaged at 19 and we married and started ttc when I was 21! I was horrendously broody from the moment I met him despite never previously being even slightly broody and wanted to do the marriage and ttc thing earlier really- we pushed the wedding back at least 3 times! I fell pregnant at 22 and had my eldest at 23. I'm now 25 with a (nearly) 22 month old and a 4.5 week old and we're wtt for number 3! I don't feel that I missed out on anything- I've never been one for travel nor a big partier and I got bored of getting really drunk for fun when I was about 20, I prefer to truly enjoy what I'm drinking! I got the whole 'too young', etc thing from family and hated it, especially towards the end when I'd been broody almost to the point of depression and certainly to the point of distraction for almost 3 years, had considered every possibility down to the tiniest detail and was only waiting because I had other things to accomplish first! Now I'm waiting as we need our 2 to be older first and a larger house but I'm already anticipating the comments we'll get in a year or so's time when we're thinking about ttc again! It'll still be a tough wait, especially as I'm broody again for pregnancy already!

Beca :wave:

 

[xcharx]

IM 24, my friends are around the same age and my close girl friends from school are nowhere near wanting to have babies.. They adore my daughter which is lovely though i guess people just want different things in life!! I never wanted to leave having kids late, were as one of my friends doesn't even want kids!!

Completely agree, my life began properly when i had my daughter

 

[RaspberryK]

I was the same but when I was pregnant met a lovely girl who ended up having her baby exactly a week after and we are now best friends, spent our whole maternity leave together and look after each others children when we work.
Xx

 

[itsnowmyturn]

I'm 24 and have been waiting since I was 16 to have babies. I'm actually in the opposite situation, all my friends have had babies, it annoys me especially when most of them got pregnant accidentally with their first. Iv been brooch since I was old enough to hold a baby, always wanted my own and that became a big deal for me at about 14 then really really broody at 16 but I held off because it was the wrong time, now at 24 everyone who didn't want them has them and the one person who does want them hasn't......doesn't seem fair

 

[odd_socks]

I have friend's that are exactly the same however most of them have kids and still feel they can continue that life and say "you don't know what it's like to have kid's". No I don't so don't rub that fact in my face!

 

[itsnowmyturn]

I have friend's that are exactly the same however most of them have kids and still feel they can continue that life and say "you don't know what it's like to have kid's". No I don't so don't rub that fact in my face!

That is by far the most annoying thing ever. I often get the 'ul understand when u have kids' and that irritates the hell out of me. I might not have kids but I'm the most maternal person anyone will ever meet and can imagine life with kids

 

[Kitteh_Kat]

We were 26 when I got pregnant, and hubby still got those comments. He always replied with something along the line of "I've gotten to do the things I wanted to do single, now I get to do them with my family." Usually shut them up!

 

[tverb84]

It seems that almost everyone that I went to high school with has a child or children.A few people I went to grade school with have kids too.