Give back a pacifier, try to night wean, or just wait it out??

[jessmke]

We took Isla's pacifiers away at 6 months with no real issues whatsoever. She has always woken a lot at night, and all the "sleep experts" say that sleep props such as pacifiers cause babies to wake more at night. Since Isla really wasn't that attached to it, and could fall asleep without it, we decided to take it away. Her sleep did not improve, and has actually gotten significantly worse the last two months. I know we are probably in the 8/9/10 month sleep regression, but I am thinking about giving her back the pacifier to see if that will help her get back to sleep at night without me needing to go in and nurse her. She will drink at night when I nurse her, but it is lazy nursing and she doesn't take a full feed, so I think it is the sucking she is after rather than the milk. She is back asleep after 5 min on the boob, only to wake again an hour and a half later wanting to suck again. Should I try giving back the pacifier, or is that just be mean to give it back only to take it away again at some point? Would it be a short term solution that may result in longer term headaches for us? Part of me thinks I need to just wait this out without trying to introduce sleep aids, but then the part of me that is up in the middle of the night for the 10th time is willing to do anything for a bit more sleep!

The other option I am considering is sending Dad in with a cup of milk when she wakes at night. The only night waking when she actually takes a full feed is around 10/11 pm, so I could still do that one but then send Dad in for the rest to hopefully night wean her and get her to sleep more at night.

I know that frequent night wakings are normal for a lot of babies, but I go back to work at the beginning of December and am really worried about how I will cope with work while being so sleep deprived. I work 10 hr shifts in a high stress job where I need to do a lot of quick math in my head, I would not trust my brain to function properly on the amount of sleep I am currently getting.

ETA: Unfortunately co-sleeping isn't an option, she sleeps even worse and wakes up every 30min or so when she is in bed with me.

 

[Starlight32]

I feel for you your nights sound so rough! My daughter has to suck her thumb to go to sleep (I hear her doing it in the middle of the night too when she wakes). She never took a pacifier but I worry about breaking the thumb sucking habit. On the other hand, I think I wouldn't get any sleep if she didn't use her thumb to help her get back to sleep!

When she used a pacifier, did you have to go in and replace it a lot?

 

[jessmke]

She could replace it by herself by the time she was 5 months old, so long as she could find one. I used to put 8 of them in her crib at night but she rolls around so much she would end up sleeping on top of all of them.

I think I am going to try sending my OH in with a cup of milk when he's on his next days off (he gets 5 off in a row). He works nights, so when he goes back to work I have to go in at night so we will only have 5 nights to try this out! If things haven't improved after 5 nights then we will abort that mission and try giving her a pacifier.

 

[Starlight32]

I'm not qualified to give pacifier advise as my baby diesnt use one, but my only thought is that most people (I think?) try to take away pacifiers by age one and she will be one when you go back to work. But it would be nice if it brought more sleep!!

 

[Twag]

My son had a dummy he slept through from 6 months old and I removed the dummy from him when he was 2 without any problems at all

My daughter has a dummy she still wakes twice a night for feeds and she is now 11 months old - I have no intention of taking it from her as she takes great comfort from it and I think her sleep would be worse if she didn't have it she has 3 in her cot and she puts them in her mouth herself if she needs too - her waking is for feeds as she drinks down a lot but then she doesn't drink much milk during the day

I work full time as an accountant and have done since she was 6 months old - being knackered is my new norm - coffee is my friend

I hope you find a solution that works for you - have you tried a white noise machine maybe?

 

[loeylo]

Gracie gas been dummy-free for a few months and no matter what I am not reintroducing it ever. I don't see the need when we have already weaned, it is very much just sticking a band aid on the problem rather than dealing with the issue properly.

Gracie started STTN at 4-6 weeks old, she still STTN (9pm-6:30am weekdays with a nap, 9pm-10:30am weekends with no naps) most nights but we go through periods of maybe a week at a time where she is up several times through the night.

Try giving a sippy cup of water in her bed with her. Or like you said, her dad giving her a cup of milk - although tbh by that age they shouldn't really "need" milk through the night -especially if you feel she isn't properly feeding at that time. Id try water.

I totally get the exhaustion thing. I'm back to working full-time and when we have a bad week with Gracie is is hard to function. I have the sort of job I cant just go in half arsed so I'm usually tired!

 

[jessmke]

Gracie gas been dummy-free for a few months and no matter what I am not reintroducing it ever. I don't see the need when we have already weaned, it is very much just sticking a band aid on the problem rather than dealing with the issue properly.

This is what I was thinking, it might get me more sleep in the short term but then I'll be kicking myself down the road when I have to take it away from her again. I took it away in the first place because she started turning her head away when I would try to give it to her, so it seemed like she really didn't care much for it. She has also never been one to comfort nurse, she will only nurse when she's actually hungry, so I didn't think she needed the sucking for comfort. It's only the last few weeks where she has been wanting to suck at night but not eat. We put a white noise machine in her room about 3 months ago but it hasn't made any difference.

I think the night waking is mostly a habit at this point, for a long time she was legitimately hungry at night and would take a full feed every time she woke, now she still wakes as often but doesn't seem to actually need the feed. I think we will try a cup of milk the first night or two to ease the transition, then switch to a cup of water. I wouldn't mind nursing her once or twice in the night if she is actually hungry, but waking 10 times or more at night when she isn't hungry is starting to get to me.

I'm sure I would find a way to survive at work on such little sleep, but I would rather not spend my days just surviving!

 

[Starlight32]

Do you think getting a zip Sleepsack could help? I remember you said she gets out of hers now. My daughter can't sleep without the sleep sack. I read somewhere not to use it after they can roll (I'm still using it, I don't think that's correct info) so I didn't use it for a night and she did not sleep well.

We use a Halo Sleepsack.

 

[minties]

Sophie was waking about every 1-2 hours at night at that age. She still used a pacifier, and had white noise, AND we co slept and it still happened. Nothing I tried fixed it. I would avoid the dummy if I were you. I'm so lucky with Emma so far as she has no pacifier, doesn't need swaddling and she often sleeps through the night (which I realise will probably not last so I'm enjoying it). My other kids wee swaddled till 7 and 8 months respectively and woke to feed a lot at this age (and till much older).

I think the 8-9-10 month sleep regression is the WORST one and I honestly was at the point of either suicide or abandoning my family at one point.