Giving up after IVF?

[Pegs11]

Hi, just wondered if anyone here decided to give up on IVF while they still had frozen embryos left over? I'm currently 8 weeks pregnant but expecting a miscarriage. This was our third FET and I just feel like I don't want to go through it again, the physical and emotional toll has been so great.

The problem is we still have 5 healthy frozen embryos, and I worry that I might feel weird/bad/guilty having them destroyed. But I am just not sure I can cope with another round... Just wondered if anyone here has been in the same situation, and how you coped? Thanks

 

[Hoping4numbr3]

I am so sorry you are going through this. I do not know anything about IVF but didn't want to read and run. Can they maybe just hold on to them for awhile or do they have to destroy them? Sorry if that is a silly question!

 

[MissWaiting]

I don't know anything about IVF but could you not take a little break and would they keep them there for you while you had a break then you will know better how you feel about stopping treatment

 

[S_secret]

Hi. I agree. I think you might want to wait for a while and regroup after your expected miscarriage is done and you are able to discuss with the clinic what you want to do with the remaining embryos. I am so sorry you are going through an expected miscarriage that’s tough for sure.

You do have options with the remaining embryos as well. Keep them frozen until you are ready to make any decisions, use them, donate them to science or other families who are pursuing embryo donation or destroy them. Those are the four options we had with our clinic and I am fairly sure that’s constant across clinics.

 

[Pegs11]

Hi, thank you all so much for your kind comments. I will certainly wait a while before making any decisions (and we have paid for embryo storage up to Feb next year so I don't need to make any decisions right now)... however, my own unique way of coping with things is to start thinking through all the possible options, should this not work out. It's just how I roll... so I would really appreciate anyone sharing their experience of deciding not to use leftover embryos, as it will just help me start compartmentalising things a bit better. Many thanks and big love to all x

 

[S_secret]

The people I know who have gone through ivf either ran out of embryos because they used them all or were successful and had a family so that’s why they didn’t use the remaining embryos. I hope you find answers!

 

[LilFooshFoosh]

I'm sorry about your impending loss. If there is any chance the baby is viable, I hope everything works work and you carry to term.

After our third round o fivf (1 fresh, 2 frozen) I couldn't do it anymore either. We had transferred 2 embies each go, so we didn't have any left. Even if I had some left I would have needed a break after the 3rd transfer... it was months of injections and I was just miserable.

We were given the option to store, donate to another family, donate for research purposes and destroy. We actually had to make a decision and sign all of the paperwork in advance. It was a difficult decision.

I'd be cautious regarding making a decision about destroying them now as doing ivf takes a physical and mental toll, plus the additional hormones and a potential miscarriage, you are going through a really rough situation and maybe need some time to breathe. If you change your mind at a later date and want to try a couple more times you'd have to start with retrieval again.

good luck with whatever you decide.