GMTV a Midwife says "promoting Breast Feeding is bad"

[tricky nicky]

i chose to formula feed and wasnt given any help at all!!
i think it should be included in antenatal support
and i think that people shouldnt be so judgemental and push the breast is best in everyones face! my mil breast fed and both her children wher constipated and had exczma???
the choice should be there from the beginning and help for everyone

 

[mama2b]

Well I think Ive read most of this thread unless Ive missed any pages out by accident and tbh I don't know where to start !!

I actually do think that once a mum has made her decision whether she is breast or bottle feeding then the mws should go through BOTH methods in hospital as soon as possible.

I am breastfeeding and although the first 3 weeks were bloody agony it was something I wanted to do so despite a battle with the pain I got through it. Because Lucas latched on pretty much no problems I had no problems apart from the toe curling pain in the first 10 secs or so (which i think everyone gets?) anyway the help I did receive was brilliant but then I do live in a very pro breastfeeding area I think.

On the other hand my friend decided to bottlefeed and got NO help whatsoever in the hospital, they didn't show her how to make up bottles.....nothing. She had to stay in 5 days and she said her main reason for wanting to go home is because she was the only one not trying bf and made to feel really uncomfortable. Now this is the worst bit, bearing in mind she was in hospital for FIVE days when the mw came round to see her at home she had been feeding her baby the WRONG milk !!!!!!!!!!!!!! She had been giving her the next stage up or something.

Can you imagine how she felt ? All because no one showed her what to do. Some people will probably just think she was stupid but apparently the formula she bought was 0-12 but not for newborns ? Im not sure as I have oonly just gone on to formula and use Aptimal whereas she has SMA so I don't know about the differences.

I can fully understand why people feel pressured to breastfeed as 90% of professionals I came into contact during my pregnancy banged on about it quite forcefully and I almost felt like saying actually no im not so sod off !!

Also (sorry if im going on now) ive raised my eyebrows to a few posts on here because it makes me wonder how many people would actually say half the things they've said to a friend stood in front of them. Out of all my friends that have young babies im the only one that breastfed longer than 6 weeks and there is no way I would say anything negative to the ones that have choose to bottlefeed, it wouldn't even cross my mind !!

Ok Im done now but just wanted to say to those that feel guilty for stopping breastfeeding, don't. I have read many times that its beneficial for baby even just to have a few first feeds so you should be proud of yourself for that

 

[asacia]

Also (sorry if im going on now) ive raised my eyebrows to a few posts on here because it makes me wonder how many people would actually say half the things they've said to a friend stood in front of them. Out of all my friends that have young babies im the only one that breastfed longer than 6 weeks and there is no way I would say anything negative to the ones that have choose to bottlefeed, it wouldn't even cross my mind !!

I definitely wouldn't say any of this stuff to other people in real life, but I felt it was a 'safe' place here to discuss it, but I forget that discussions always have feelings attached.

I find the different attitudes to feeding in different families odd. My In-laws don't discuss it, they've never asked how I feed, never mentioned how they fed, never offered any advice or any opinions. I think my SIL breastfed, but I'm not sure. I know my other SIL bottlefeeds because I've seen her do it, but never been mentioned why. In my family, everyone is interested. My Mum always asks how his is feeding, and when I was expressing my Grandparents asked for updates. Bro was very interested in what the expressing thing was all about. My Dad also took the only pictures of my breastfeeding!

I do have one friend I discuss feeding with, she has twins and exclusively BFs one, and combination feeds the other, and I like to ask about the logistics of it - very interesting having two babies doing slightly different things.

 

[asacia]

Also, does the NHS Birth-Five book (or something like that?) mention much about feeding? I never got my copy, but perhaps that would be a good delivery method for specific things like how to make up bottles, how to choose formula etc? Is it usually given before birth?

 

[krissie1234uk]

Also, does the NHS Birth-Five book (or something like that?) mention much about feeding? I never got my copy, but perhaps that would be a good delivery method for specific things like how to make up bottles, how to choose formula etc? Is it usually given before birth?

I'm not going to comment on the rest of the thread but in answer to your question, I received my Birth to Five book when I first saw my HV, about 3 and a half weeks after Dylan was born.

 

[polo_princess]

Sounds to me that some people believe the NHS should be prepared for parents who have failed to prepare themselves. All the info is out there, it's all available. I see no reason why the NHS should have to teach parents to perform a relatively simple task like make up a bottle of milk, let alone do/provide it for them.

Sorry but i had to pull this comment out ....

By spending hours and hours researching on the net and then choosing to FF i have somehow failed to prepare myself?

As they say ignorance is bliss ....

I honestly cant see why everyone wants to tear pieces off eachother over feeding a baby, really ... what is there to argue about? The more everyone argues the bigger the divide becomes and it just makes things worse tbh!!

 

[Jo]

Just to follow on from your comment PP

Yeah ok it is pretty straightforward to prepare bottles, it is not rocket science but some people can be a bit ditzy adding milk then water ect...
With a new baby everything is scary.

So with the being prepared bit, there is so many choices if you walk in to Mothercare or Boots
Which bottles do you go for? Tomme tippee? Mam? Avent? Dr Browns? Own Brands?
Ok you have picked your bottles, now what teats are you going to use? Latex? Silicone? slow flow? Medium? Variflo? are they going to be slanted? are they going to have nobbles on?. Right Ok you have that sorted after hours of looking and umming and ahhhing.

How are you going to sterilise? Cold water, Microsteam, electric steam, or get a thing for the dishwasher? which is best for you?

I feel that maybe just a bit in an antenatel class telling you about the different options available if you choose to FF would be fantastic, I don't know about anyone else but I went through a few different teats until we settled on one that was just right.

I'm sorry but this entire thread is like groundhog day, it seems like every other week there is a thread that turns into a v's, I don't know about you ladies but thesen threads now make me want to poke myself in the eye

 

[polo_princess]

I'm sorry but this entire thread is like groundhog day, it seems like every other week there is a thread that turns into a v's, I don't know about you ladies but these threads now make me want to poke myself in the eye

With a fork

 

[sparkswillfly]

Its nothing we havent read a thousand times before

 

[Brockie]

ive read most of this thread and then drifted off to sleep... haha

sorry, but some people on this forum clearly love a good slanging match!

i watched the GMTV article, the MW on there was not promoting FF and kept saying that they still push BF first and foremost, but that if women cannot BFeed then yes help should be made available in making up bottles safely and i agree, it should. Becoming a mum is one hell of a shock, and the last thing i would want any new mum to feel like would be worried and panicking about how to make their babies feed, theres enough to worry about.

you can't win either way!

 

[Emmylou27]

Ok, I know what happened with me was not the norm but...

I was not offered antenatal classes - I spoke to my MW around 12 weeks about NCT ones; she told me not to bother and to go to NHS ones. When I asked another MW (I hardly ever saw the same one!) later on in my pregnancy about them I found out there weren't any offered where I live.

I was going to BF, no questions asked - I only got some bottles and formula in because a work friend suggested it 'just in case'. I only knew which formula to buy because she recommended some. I really didn't pay much attention because I was going to BF and it was going to be fab! Perhaps this was a little naive but there you are.

Then Daisy arrived. She was whisked off to intensive care then transferred to another children's hospital. I couldn't go as I'd just had a C-section and there were no provisions there to look after me.

I still thought I'd somehow manage to BF though. The MW at the hospital managed to get me manually expressing (god, that hurt!) Meanwhile, Daisy was given formula, out of a syringe so she didn't get used to bottles.

By the time I was let out a couple of days later the nurses at the children's hospital had started to give Daisy bottles, even though I still didn't want them to - I was still convinced I would somehow BF. The problem was, I couldn't be at the children's hospital 24/7, I was still trying to recover and was making myself ill trying to dash back and forth - hell, I could hardly get into a car. So, although I expressed I couldn't get enough to the hospital to sustain and so they started mixing the feeds with formula. I remember the first time they asked if I wanted to feed her - next thing you knew a bottle appeared with some hot water and the teat separately. I didn't have a clue and felt so ashamed having to ask.

When I got Daisy home I didn't know how to make up formula, how hot the water needed to be, how much etc. etc. It had all been done for me and maybe I should have asked for more info but I guess I was more focused on other things that were going on. I tried to BF but she wasn't interested, I was feeling pretty traumatised and so I chose to stop- much to my grandmothers horror - she made me feel awful about it.

Anyway, the upshot is that I had no info, nothing about FF and so when that's what I started to do I actually found it quite scary. MW's and other health professionals need to offer more information on FF as things don't always go to plan. I don't know what info would have been given if I'd chosen to FF from the start so I can't comment. It's only now I'm realising if you want something you have to ask for it. As a mum to be/new mum I thought all info needed would be provided.

If it hadn't been for this place I wouldn't have had a clue. So aside from all the arguing, thank you ladies Now, please, can we not get back to supporting each other which is what I thought this place was about? x

 

[jms895]

In my antenatal classes a few girls asked about sterilising and bottles etc and the MWs said I am sorry we cant advise on that! we can only advise on BF.........

 

[mama2b]

If it hadn't been for this place I wouldn't have had a clue. So aside from all the arguing, thank you ladies Now, please, can we not get back to supporting each other which is what I thought this place was about? x

Agreed

 

[sparkswillfly]

In my antenatal classes a few girls asked about sterilising and bottles etc and the MWs said I am sorry we cant advise on that! we can only advise on BF.........

yeah apparently they cant advise about FF in group sessions only on a one to one basis if the mother asks.

 

[Sovereign]

I think we should all just leave it now! I don't know about anyone else but i've got a headache now lol x

 

[lesleyann]

its the threads that end up like this that make the whole split sections for BF and FF a bit pointless because everyone still gets hurt/upset again

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

Do people really get that hurt by someone else's opinion? I quite enjoy a good lively discussion, personally. I guess if people are bored with a discussion or topic they do not have to look at that thread.

 

[Sovereign]

It's not someone elses opinion that bothers me, I enjoy a 'debate' too but sometimes it just gets a bit too personal IMO. Anyway, like you say, i'm not going to look at this again, cos it's making me feel crappy lol!!!! x

 

[lesleyann]

Do people really get that hurt by someone else's opinion? I quite enjoy a good lively discussion, personally. I guess if people are bored with a discussion or topic they do not have to look at that thread.

You will find it will hurt some people, people that really wanted to BF and cant ect and saying dont look at the thread well they could read it and at the start it could just be a disscussion on GMTV and how they do things so they continue to read then all the comments about no help for FF and all that stuff and that FF should be like last resort rather than an option or being able to pick will hurt some people, there are all kinds of people on a forum and some will take offence and get upset by some of the comments on threads that turn into ones like this

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

Do people really get that hurt by someone else's opinion? I quite enjoy a good lively discussion, personally. I guess if people are bored with a discussion or topic they do not have to look at that thread.

You will find it will hurt some people, people that really wanted to BF and cant ect and saying dont look at the thread well they could read it and at the start it could just be a disscussion on GMTV and how they do things so they continue to read then all the comments about no help for FF and all that stuff and that FF should be like last resort rather than an option or being able to pick will hurt some people, there are all kinds of people on a forum and some will take offence and get upset by some of the comments on threads that turn into ones like this

OK fair enough. Just to let you know though, I am one of the people who wanted to BF and couldn't. Therefore, I don't get upset by people saying FF should be second choice because to me, it was. I guess people who have chosen FF as a their first choice may not like some of the posts in this thread. I'm not adding any more to this now