Hb dreams are over *UPDATED with birth*

[Emmea12uk]

Sob sob sob. I have woken up this morning after a seventh false labour yesterday absolutely fine. No twinges, nothing. Tomorrow morning is induction day.

Let me take you through my journey to here :

Three years ago I expected my son to be born with spina bifida & hydrocephalus and indeed after a very messy assisted induction he was forcefully removed by forecepts as his heart rate kept stopping and after three days of labour with the cord around his neck he was in a lot of distress. They didn't do a section due to theatre being too full and us not taking priority over the other emergencies. As a result my labour didn't progress after 5 cm even on pitocin and I had the firm belief my son wouldn't make it. They gave me am epi against my wishes as they believed I couldn't do it without.

I came out of all of this with a child who had spinal surgery, brain surgery and a brain hemmorage immediately after birth. Needless to say I was physically and mentally traumatized.

Now, during this pregnancy, the ghosts of what I went through kept creeping back every time I had a scan or an appointment and I started to realise I could not go through that again - not there in that ward. I was diagnosed with very mild gd so all the centers refused me - despite me controlling my sugar well. So I said hb it is then.

They didn't agree with me - the gd team kept harping on about stillbirths. I think met with every mw and consultant there to be put off but I hired a doula, did my research and put my foot down. The only stipulations in the end were if there was mec or I went over 41 weeks I would have to go to "that" ward.

To be fair - they offered me cbt just in case but rather dissapointingly it never took place.

Here is a lesson for everyone - baby will not come by natural induction methods - I have tried all of these:

Hot chillis & curry
Expressing colostrum
Lots of sex
Loads of rlt
Epo internally and externally
Clarey sage baths, massages and aromatherapy
Birth balls
Walking
Homeopathy - cimi & caul & anti anxiety remedies
Acupuncture
Accupressure
Resting
Keeping the house dark
Hypnotherapy
Sweep


And the results... 7 false labours which stopped when the sun came up!

Now I am in a stupid state of anxiety and panic and because my last child was so sick I can't bravely say no to the induction because I will just panic about her being safe.

My compromise is to discharge myself tomorrow after my induction but I am not holding much hope that will work either.

I just wanted a moan because all of this is whizzing around in my head and I can't sleep. Time to press on with anti anxiety remedies I think and just pray tomorrow ends with a healthy happy baby who feeds well. Please wish me Luck

 

[lozzy21]

They cant make you go in to be induced hun, nothing stopping you ringing them up and saying you want to wait a few more days. Its you baby and its your birth. If your feeling stressed about the possible induction your not going to go into labour, adrenalin stops all the labour hormones from being produced.

If you dont feel ready for it then dont do it. Our instincts are there for a reason and are usually right.

 

[Emmea12uk]

I know this but my anxiety is starting to be about the safety of the baby - no staying at home and delaying is getting too much too.

 

[Nikki_d72]

Aw good luck hon, I'm sure you can still make it very different and make it your own. I presume your doula will come in with you? That alone should make a big difference. Can you ask them to start slowly on the Pit and only increase bit by bit, rather than whacking it up every 15mins or so? It might only take a wee bit to get you started on your own. I wish I could come up with something wiser...

 

[CMarie]

I'm so sorry about your first birth I can only imagine how scared you are now!

Do you have the option of being monitored at all? I've declined induction until at least 42 weeks and my doctor said that instead she'd send me for ultrasounds every couple days to make sure my LO is still doing ok. I'm not sure how that would go over since you have gd, but it might be worth a shot

 

[Mervs Mum]

You are still in control. You still have a choice x

 

[lynnikins]

hun you need to be where your are most comfortable for the sake of your baby and yourself i hope your birth partner can support you and back you up at this tough time

 

[Emmea12uk]

well - i managed to convice a mw at the birth centre to do another sweep and this time she said my cervix was thick and posterior but very soft and stretchy and she could easily get two fingers in. she spent ages in there and said the fontenelle is in the wrong place - baby is and has been lying wrongly due to my weak abdomen - all the weight is not getting pushed on to my cervix at all with my contractions stopping me from progressing.

so now my moby is on slinging up my belly !!

almost immediately after i had what i think is the last of my plug - it was very bloody and veiny and now i am bleeding a little from the sweep. So fingers crossed! i might just get in there tonight! at least the hope will stop my anxiety for the night.

 

[Mervs Mum]

Relax yourself into labour now!! No more trying!!

 

[booflebump]

Hope your moby does the trick and bubs sits on your cervix a bit better. That might be all you need to get the hormones going for your contractions. Good luck

 

[fairywings]

Just wanted to say good luck. xx

 

[Leahmasie]

Good luck! I hope it happens soon for you. If you are controlling your sugar very well there should be no worries about waiting until 42 weeks for the induction. I hope you give yourself a few more days.

 

[Leahmasie]

One more thing I thought of, I saw your impressive list of things you've tried to get labor started, I went though many of them too! Didn't work, but, i had three sweeps and each of them gave me a few hours of contractions, which I do think helped get my body ready.

I didn't try raspberry leaf tea though. I've since read that if you are having contractions lots of raspberry leaf tea (like 1-4 pots, a real lot of tea) will make them more effective. You could try a pot of tea and bouncing on the birth ball today, then another pot this evening, and then either rest for tomorrow, or another pot at night if things are progressing.

 

[lousielou]

All the best hun - really hope things get going for you xx

 

[Samantha675]

Good luck! Sending

 

[Freya]

Release any mental blocks you may still have in place about labour and birth and do your best to relax! Go with it. Sending positive labour vibes Hun. Xxx

 

[irish_cob]

Good luck, hope you're in proper established labour right now!

 

[CMarie]

Good luck! I hope the sweep worked Keep us posted!!!

 

[Croc-O-Dile]

I went into natural labour only 14 hours before my induction. And only an hour after I'd seen my MW and she'd said I was still 1.5cm dilated and baby was not coming that day.
Fx'd you're in labour right now!

 

[chuck]

Hope all is well hun, don't give in because things have been booked for you, you can cancel just as easily as canceling an appt at the hairdresser.

Hope that sweep and Moby have moved things along!