Emmea12uk
The Folic acid police!
- Joined
- Mar 29, 2008
- Messages
- 5,090
- Reaction score
- 2
Ok so this morning after my eigth night of labour which stopped as soon as I hot up I was ready to compromise! But I get in the hospital and instantly am transformed into a diabetic who can't this and can't that for the sake of my baby. Suddenly there is no compromise!! If I walk out then I give birth at home with no safeguards at all but to meet mr halfway is too risky.
My labour last night left me ripe - too ripe for a pessery. My only induction option is membrane rupture or home. If I go home then I have to put my disabled child through the routine again and sort care for him. If I go ahead with the membrane rupture then I have to give birth in the rooms I had my son in which terrify me. I absolutely can not have a waterbirth and I absolutely cannot go to the birth ward one level up where I am not traumatized. I absolutely can't go home and after only two hours from membrane rupture I absolutely MUST have the pitocin drip - the sane god damn drip that put my son's life at risk and caused the trauma last time leading to forcepts and brain hemmorage.
What the hell place is this?!? I can give birth at home but I can't go up one flight of sodding stairs to an altogether more peaceful place? This is wrong ... So bloody wrong!
I am waiting for the doctors to put my foot down and negotiate a compromise - they let me labor upstairs in peace or they can go fuck themselves - I can't put my son through all this again and I won't put myself into a room I am terrified off.
I know I am so close and most people would say stay at home but I can't let go of the fact my last labor ended so badly and at home I am an hour away from help. I am no longer relaxed and in the mindset to do it at home - I am exhausted after eight starts and baby still isn't resting on my cervix.
My labour last night left me ripe - too ripe for a pessery. My only induction option is membrane rupture or home. If I go home then I have to put my disabled child through the routine again and sort care for him. If I go ahead with the membrane rupture then I have to give birth in the rooms I had my son in which terrify me. I absolutely can not have a waterbirth and I absolutely cannot go to the birth ward one level up where I am not traumatized. I absolutely can't go home and after only two hours from membrane rupture I absolutely MUST have the pitocin drip - the sane god damn drip that put my son's life at risk and caused the trauma last time leading to forcepts and brain hemmorage.
What the hell place is this?!? I can give birth at home but I can't go up one flight of sodding stairs to an altogether more peaceful place? This is wrong ... So bloody wrong!
I am waiting for the doctors to put my foot down and negotiate a compromise - they let me labor upstairs in peace or they can go fuck themselves - I can't put my son through all this again and I won't put myself into a room I am terrified off.
I know I am so close and most people would say stay at home but I can't let go of the fact my last labor ended so badly and at home I am an hour away from help. I am no longer relaxed and in the mindset to do it at home - I am exhausted after eight starts and baby still isn't resting on my cervix.
xxx
