herpes and vaginal delivery - tmi - no judging, please!

[ltbustle]

Hi all! I debated posting this or not since I am fairly active on this board and would not be able to stomach any judging right now, so please only respond with relevant information or positive thoughts

About 10 years ago, during what I like to affectionately refer to as my "dark ages", I had a flare-up of what I thought might be herpes, but never went to a doctor out of fear and embarrassment. Well, that was the only time I ever had any signs or symptoms so I (conveniently) put the idea and the experience out of my mind and moved on. Fast forward to 2011, when I went to the hospital with meningitis. The docs told me that the herpes virus could cause certain brain infections, so they did a blood test, which was negative for herpes. That was a huge relief, but based on what's going on now, I have to say the results were inaccurate.

I am now 37 weeks pregnant and have one small lesion on the outside of my lady parts. I feel terrible as I know I have given this to my fiance (I told him shortly after he had his first outbreak last year; until then I wanted to believe the negative blood test), but the WORST part is obviously the threat this poses to my unborn son! I spoke to my doctor about it yesterday, and she prescribed Valtrex to take until my delivery date, and did not seem very concerned as long as I don't go into labor while the lesion is still present. I, of course, am EXTREMELY concerned, and have read on various health boards that the threat to the baby can remain up to a month after an outbreak (due to skin shedding). I am now debating whether a planned c-section would not be a safer idea than just hoping I don't go into labor within the next month. Based on my doctor's reaction yesterday, I think her recommendation will be vaginal delivery unless the lesion is active, but I REALLY REALLY would prefer to err on the safe side.

If anybody has any experience with this, or knows someone who does, PLEASE comment! Of course I will be discussing this further with my doctor, but I would like to be armed with as much information as possible before I make any decisions.

Thanks in advance!

 

[Mrs5707]

Bless your heart... My best friend has herpes due to an extremely drunken black-out party night in college... We've all been there, some of us are just unluckier than others
I have read up on this some, just to be there as a support for my BFF when she faces this situation, and I'd have to say that I agree with what your dr is telling you. Everything I've read says that unless you're having an active outbreak, a vaginal delivery is perfectly safe.
Good luck

 

[sassymrsbee]

Absolutely no judgement here! If anyone wants to say that they have not experienced thier own "dark times" then good for them, but I know that I went through my own experiences!

As for your concerns, my own mother has herpes and ended up delivering myself and my brother via C-Section ONLY because she was terrified we would contract it. She had my 7 (yes, 7, I am the oldest of 9!) siblings naturally, and not one of them contracted the herpes virus. I think it was due to the Dr support and understanding, plus, 20+ years ago they didnt know enough about it to really risk babies getting it through vaginal delivery. But now they know enough, and it seems like your Dr is very supportive and proactive and I honestly think that unless you are having a major breakout, there is no reason you cannot have a natural delivery!

 

[SpotlessMind]

Wow, I'm shocked a blood test could be wrong! Makes me worried about my std testing as, as said above, we've all had our dark times.

Sorry I don't have much experience, but I'd like to encourage you to go with how you feel. I'd go ahead and give your doctor a call and discuss it, can't hurt to learn. If they seem stand-off ish just make sure you express how important this conversation is to you. Good luck!

 

[staceyj83]

As long as you are not having an outbreak baby is ok make sure to take the meds it will help stop the outbreaks my ex sister in law has it and had my nephew vaginal almost 8 years old and he is fine.

 

[iwantabub]

Hey hun... im not sure about the delivery side... just go with what your comfy with... howeve r dont feel bad.. shit happens and none of us are perfect!

I get cold sores and one of my friends came out and said she has gh... I asked her how she dealt with it and she said as long as shes helthy she rarely has any sores or any kind of outbreak and is totally normal otherwise...

My point is I think people over dramatise these things and gh is really no big deal at all... I hope u come to a decision and ur birth goes well either way.

 

[nyllioness]

My cousin also has genital herpes and she had all 5 of her kids vaginally. I do remember her having an outbreak with at least one of her pregnancies about 4-6 weeks before she delivered. They also gave her Valtrex and she delivered vaginally with no problems. I do understand your concern though just because you are 37 weeks and could go into labor at any time really. My cousin told me (not specifically about delivery but just in general) that it can still be passed up to 14 days before or after the outbreak has come/gone - so that is the scary part. I think that probably contributes to it getting passed to partners also because alot of people think it can only be passed while there are visible lesions - definitely not true. I assume the reason your dr isn't concerned about a vag. birth is because of the meds - maybe that reduces the risk of passing it on? You did the right thing by telling your dr. (I can only imagine how hard that probably was) and now that you have, at your next appt I would go ahead and express your concerns and ask questions about the possibility of passing the virus to baby after the outbreak is cleared up (during that "shedding" time). Oh also by the way I have heard of that happening quite a bit with false negative blood tests so you're not alone with that either. Good luck and I'm sure everything will be fine for you and baby!

 

[ltbustle]

thank you, ladies, for the input and experiences. most of what i've read indicates that vaginal delivery is optimal, but like nyllioness pointed out, there is definitely a window where you might not have an outbreak per se, but are still contagious! and herpes can be deadly to a baby. i would def prefer vaginal delivery complete with labor..... it's funny because up til yesterday, i was doing things to try and BRING ON labor, and now i'm gonna do everything i can to keep it weeks in the future.

UGH so disappointing and scary!

 

[RomaTomato]

I've said it once and I'll say it again: people who judge you can eat a bag of dicks. It's a VIRUS, it can happen to anyone.

I have GH too, thanks to an ex bf. I too, did not go to the doctor due to fear and embarrassment but I pretty much accepted the fact that I had it. I told my DH that I "probably had it" long before we were ever intimate and he didn't care, he said I was special and it didn't matter to him He is the best! We have been together for 3 years and he has never had an OB. I did not get a solid diagnosis of HSV-2 until a couple of months ago, so I now I know for sure!

My doctor is not concerned and to be honest I am not really worried about it either. I am starting Valtrex next week, I have not taken any antiviral to date and my body has become pretty good at keeping it at bay. Of course there is always a risk of passing it to the baby but the chances of that are actually quite slim. The fact that you have had it for 10+ years is actually good, as you will pass antibodies to your LO that will protect him from the virus, and taking Valtrex will further protect him.

The real danger with herpes and babies is when a woman has her primary OB or contracts the virus during pregnancy, the later in the pregnancy the worse it is, as the mother's body does not have any immunity built up against the virus.

A lot of people have herpes but the vast majority of them have no idea, they say it is as high as 1 in 4 people! That's a lot of babies born to women with GH who have no idea!! Complications DO happen but really they are few and far between. Oh and I have read many many times that the blood test for herpes can be VERY inaccurate!!

Try not to stress about it (we know what stress does!) and talk to your doctor about it more, if you really feel strongly that you should have a c section then maybe it is the best course of action.

Good luck and big hugs! It sucks to have one more thing to worry about, I feel you sister!

 

[Larawr]

If you have the virus before pregnancy you will pass on antibodies to the baby which helps them fight the virus. Even if you have open sores at the time of delivery the chance of them contracting the virus is as little as 3 in 100. Like RomaTomato said, the danger comes when you get the virus for the first time in late pregnancy, as your body hasn't got time to make antibodies and pass them on. Try not to worry about it hope everything goes smoothly for you!

 

[jojo_b]

Sorry but eating a bag of dicks is THE best phrase ever!

 

[solitaire89]

I just wanted to throw this out into the ring, that if you're coming up with negative bloods, what may very well present just like genital herpes may not be genital herpes. Interestingly, Actifed (the cough medicine) can cause an outbreak of "sores" that are exactly the same as gh - so much so, they've even fooled gps. And before any smart alec remarks, I'm talking if you take it as recommended
I'm afraid I don't have any advice at all with regards to a vaginal delivery and herpes, but just thought it was worth commenting.

 

[waiting_game]

No judgement here. I got hsv from getting raped at 15. I just delivered my son yesterday. They had me take valtex, and as extra precaution gave me Iv antibiotics. Have not experienced an out break in over a year, and drs are saying he should be just fine! I delivered vaginally also

 

[ltbustle]

No judgement here. I got hsv from getting raped at 15. I just delivered my son yesterday. They had me take valtex, and as extra precaution gave me Iv antibiotics. Have not experienced an out break in over a year, and drs are saying he should be just fine! I delivered vaginally also

Congrats on your new baby boy

And thanks for sharing your experience!

 

[RomaTomato]

I just wanted to throw this out into the ring, that if you're coming up with negative bloods, what may very well present just like genital herpes may not be genital herpes. Interestingly, Actifed (the cough medicine) can cause an outbreak of "sores" that are exactly the same as gh - so much so, they've even fooled gps. And before any smart alec remarks, I'm talking if you take it as recommended
I'm afraid I don't have any advice at all with regards to a vaginal delivery and herpes, but just thought it was worth commenting.

This is very true! You may think you have it but don't, as there are a lot of other conditions that can present like GH but really isn't.

 

[_jellybean_]

I agree with previous posters. Hon, I'd have your doctor do a swab test if you're able, and then s/he can test for the herpes virus. There are other things you can get down there that aren't herpes.

Massive hugs

 

[sugaree13]

actually read through because my bff tested positive a little over a year ago and it's causing her to wonder if she wants to start to ttc.

i'd sincerely hope no one here is going to judge you for this! I doubt any of us have always been perfect angels our whole lives!
And the incorrectly negative test is scary - i try to get tested at my yearly gyno visit for peace of mind and its scary that the results could be wrong!

I'm sure the docs are going to do whats best for you and it sounds like youre LO will be safe. Good luck but you and LO will be fine!

 

[ltbustle]

I agree with previous posters. Hon, I'd have your doctor do a swab test if you're able, and then s/he can test for the herpes virus. There are other things you can get down there that aren't herpes.

Massive hugs

My doctor actually ran the STD clinic here in town for 15 years, and I did ask her to do a culture. She said she'd be willing to place money on the fact that it is a recurrent herpes flare-up

I'm okay with it, I mean I kind of figured I had it after that first outbreak but wishful thinking kept me from admitting to myself... I only wish I had been honest with my man, but the blood test had me thinking I was clear... but oh well hindsight is 20/20.

The meds have already got me cleared up, so as long as I continue with them, and as long as my little Logan doesn't make an appearance within the next week or so, I think we'll be okay.

Thank you, ladies

 

[smoore]

I have to be honest. I used to be all judgemental about herpes.

Until.. two years ago. My husband performed oral sex on me while he had a cold sore. This led to me contracting herpes. My doctor does not have any concerns and will be having me on meds from around 34 weeks as others have mentioned.

I have never really told anyone, besides my husband obviously, about my diagnosis, because I feel like people are so judgey about it and think of it as a dirty disease that only happens to promiscious people.

I'm not too concerned as I haven't had an actual outbreak since a month after my first one. However, it was a worry when I first got pregnant until the doctor was pretty calm about it.

I'm sure it will all be fine honey!

 

[Jendra]

I think personally, I'd wait and see. Go into labour naturally, and if you're flaring up, then perhaps have a C-section. I mean, I don't know the infection rate in terms of passing it on (Though your doctor certainly would), but birthing vaginally with a flare-up could really add some undue suffering or issues (Maybe?)

This is a good time to consult your doctor. And don't beat yourself up. These things happen, a lot. No one gets herpes on purpose, and more people have it than are actually aware of it. It's very common.