Home Birthers & Hopefuls!

[kiwimama]

Hi Ladies,
Sorry I've been awol the last few weeks being on holiday so no updates. If anyone needs an update could you let me know again... the pages seem to go way back with you chatterboxes! I only got Gretachick and rayasunshine on there.
Update from me - saw the midwife last week and iron is low so I'm on tabs to get that back up. Went to have a 3d scan as well but no luck - baby is breech with legs flexed at the hips so his feet are right up over his head! Will have to go back later and make sure he's moved. Our hypnobirthing classes start tomorrow evening - really hoping they will get my confidence up. The closer I get to the birth, the more nervous I seem to be getting, quite the opposite of where I need to be.

 

[Mervs Mum]

Hi KM! If baby stays breech talk to your hypnobirthing teacher about the breech script. Sid was and we did the breech turning script after one lesson and bingo! he was trying to turn right there and then (hubby was watching) and had jumped right over by the presentation scan 3 days after!

 

[kiwimama]

Thanks mm - how far along were you when he turned?

 

[Mervs Mum]

37 weeks so you actually have ages yet really - sorry I should have looked properly

 

[Anababe]

I was feeling so positive about a home birth with this one and now i dont know what to do.

My dad has been my birth partner for both previous babies, and hes been great. But this time he seems so dismissive and negative to everything i want.

Ive talked to him tonight about a doula which hes reacted to quite badly saying its ridiculous and i should be experienced enough to do it on my own after having two So i tried to explain about it being my first home birth and that im really interested in a water birth, his reply was almost sarcastic as if its a joke.. i actually felt silly like 'how stupid of me to want something different'

I tried to explain that i thought he'd be a bit more positive about my birth decisions and he tells me hes busy and not got time to talk about it. Hes just taking this pregnancy for granted i think, like ive done it twice so ill be fine i dont need the same support, when i do, probably more so this time! I know hes busy so i said isnt that even more of a reason to have a doula, someone who can be there to support me when he cant, and he just said 'oh do whatever you think is best' and put phone down Im really shocked and disappointed as he was so involved with my last two.

Im actually thinking it might be better for me not to have him at the labour/birth this time. I really want to be relaxed and positive not stressed and scared like my others

 

[Anababe]

Oh and my first was breech until 38 weeks! Little monster made me wait til last minute but he did turn eventually.. so plenty time yet kiwimama

 

[chuck]

https://www.liquidmatrix.org/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/facepalm.jpg

Thought I'd just have a listen to my natal hypnotherapy CD while In was having a bath just a kinda of listen in to know what to expect when i can set aside time to listen to them properly.

Hubby walks in to have a pee (I knew I should have locked the door) he LOL's at me..."what ARE you listening to? It sounds like that episode of friends...you know 'you are a strong confident woman who does not need to smoke'..."

MEN!!

 

[Mervs Mum]

Anababe - I wonder if your dad is thinking that by saying you'd like a doula you are implying that the support he's given you with your other two, isn't enough? We know that's not the case at all but perhaps that's his initial reaction. What you describes sounds like he's a bit hurt or put out. I know it can be a common reaction for some partners. I think his reaction is more about his own feelings than him not wanting to support you in what ever you want. I imagine more than anything he wants you to have the birth you want and probably cant understand why when together you've managed it twice before, why cant you just do that again.....

Give him a little time and space. Ultimately it's about no one except you. Not about him, not about the doula, the MW, the kids.....it's about you. Perhaps he needs a little time to digest that you'd really like this additional support. That doesnt mean you havent loved and appreciated his support in previous labours and also doesnt necessarily mean that you wont want and need his support again this time it just means that you've learned from previous experiences and want to really get the very best from this one too.

 

[Bournefree]

https://www.liquidmatrix.org/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/facepalm.jpg

Thought I'd just have a listen to my natal hypnotherapy CD while In was having a bath just a kinda of listen in to know what to expect when i can set aside time to listen to them properly.

Hubby walks in to have a pee (I knew I should have locked the door) he LOL's at me..."what ARE you listening to? It sounds like that episode of friends...you know 'you are a strong confident woman who does not need to smoke'..."

MEN!!

hahahaha!!!! That episode with Chandler is really funny!
xXx

 

[Bournefree]

Hi Ladies,
Sorry I've been awol the last few weeks being on holiday so no updates. If anyone needs an update could you let me know again... the pages seem to go way back with you chatterboxes! I only got Gretachick and rayasunshine on there.
Update from me - saw the midwife last week and iron is low so I'm on tabs to get that back up. Went to have a 3d scan as well but no luck - baby is breech with legs flexed at the hips so his feet are right up over his head! Will have to go back later and make sure he's moved. Our hypnobirthing classes start tomorrow evening - really hoping they will get my confidence up. The closer I get to the birth, the more nervous I seem to be getting, quite the opposite of where I need to be.

Hope you had a great holiday?¬! Fingers crossed LO gets turning!

I was thinking of trying to get into a hypnobirthing class. I know that loads of ladies on here have raved about it.. but I hadn't heard about it with my first. I've been reading a book from the libary about it and it seems the type of things that I utimately did use in my first birth, so I'm going to look into some classes.
What do you guys think - would it be a help, or for me, a waste of money?

Also - could my due date be changed to the 13th of july? Thank you.

They moved me at my scan (although, I'm wondering if I can keep this on the QT, so if I go over, there won't be as much pressure! (Que evil laugh - Whaahahaha!)

 

[Anababe]

Anababe - I wonder if your dad is thinking that by saying you'd like a doula you are implying that the support he's given you with your other two, isn't enough? We know that's not the case at all but perhaps that's his initial reaction. What you describes sounds like he's a bit hurt or put out. I know it can be a common reaction for some partners. I think his reaction is more about his own feelings than him not wanting to support you in what ever you want. I imagine more than anything he wants you to have the birth you want and probably cant understand why when together you've managed it twice before, why cant you just do that again.....

Give him a little time and space. Ultimately it's about no one except you. Not about him, not about the doula, the MW, the kids.....it's about you. Perhaps he needs a little time to digest that you'd really like this additional support. That doesnt mean you havent loved and appreciated his support in previous labours and also doesnt necessarily mean that you wont want and need his support again this time it just means that you've learned from previous experiences and want to really get the very best from this one too.

Thanks hun

I had a talk to my dad last night and he admitted hes probably taking for granted this pregnancy being my third and with me coping ok so far with the pregnancy and two children he maybe hasnt made as much effort as he should have to support me. He said he realises he's just assumed ive nothing to be worried about with it being my third but now understands i must still have worries and fears the same as the others.

Were going to have a good chat about the birth over next couple of weeks and discuss what i want.

Feeling bit more positive now

 

[Mervs Mum]

Glad to hear it. I'm sure if you are honest with him, then he will be with you. We all forget sometimes that some things are not about us so we have to put our own issues and feelings aside for the sake of the person who it IS about.

x

 

[3011busyyear]

another newbie here, just decided in last few week to go for a home water birth if possible.
I'm due 30th Jan with a girl.
getting very nervous now, just watching as many of the nice calm water births as possible to keep me chilled.
bit unsure about the birth affirmations/rainbow relaxation, i'm not sure if they will relax me or frustrate me in labour...guess we'll see!

 

[Mervs Mum]

Welcome!

 

[Jenniflower]

Thought I'd just have a listen to my natal hypnotherapy CD while In was having a bath just a kinda of listen in to know what to expect when i can set aside time to listen to them properly.

Hubby walks in to have a pee (I knew I should have locked the door) he LOL's at me..."what ARE you listening to? It sounds like that episode of friends...you know 'you are a strong confident woman who does not need to smoke'..."

MEN!!

I think that myself when I get into a particular part of my relaxation track. She actually starts saying "You are a strong an confident women" And I giggle. I suppose that's not helping.

On a completely OT side note: During my wedding our Minister starting saying "Marriage is about the giving and receiving..." and my sister and I (huge friends fans) actually started giggling. Everyone was like

Anababe: I'm so glad to hear you and your dad are going to work things out.

Not sure if we're done talking about this or not but see that whole 96 hours thing with the NICE guidelines, can some send me a quote or a link? I tried skimming through the actual guidelines and could only see the 24 hour thing. It's worded like you all say, as women should be merely offered it. But I couldn't find where it said ultimately how long you have. Thanks!

 

[Anababe]

I think that myself when I get into a particular part of my relaxation track. She actually starts saying "You are a strong an confident women" And I giggle. I suppose that's not helping.

On a completely OT side note: During my wedding our Minister starting saying "Marriage is about the giving and receiving..." and my sister and I (huge friends fans) actually started giggling. Everyone was like

Anababe: I'm so glad to hear you and your dad are going to work things out.

Not sure if we're done talking about this or not but see that whole 96 hours thing with the NICE guidelines, can some send me a quote or a link? I tried skimming through the actual guidelines and could only see the 24 hour thing. It's worded like you all say, as women should be merely offered it. But I couldn't find where it said ultimately how long you have. Thanks!

 

[chuck]

On a completely OT side note: During my wedding our Minister starting saying "Marriage is about the giving and receiving..." and my sister and I (huge friends fans) actually started giggling. Everyone was like

LOL...my hubby and I joked that we should both say during our vows in the to death do us part bit...say 'or until something better comes along'...the cheeky git actually whispered it to me though during the ceremony, although the civil ceremony woman heard him and DID NOT look impressed!

 

[Amy_K]

Just wanted to share... we just got back from our appointment with the consultant and he has 'okayed' us for the home birth! Very happy about this indeed. Off to order the birth pool now

 

[Bournefree]

^^^ brilliant news!
Happy birth pool shopping!
xxx

 

[PeanutBean]

Yay!