Oh ER - PLEASE, please try not to let the buggers get you down!
I feel so sad for you right now! I can empathise, It is horrible, and you do feel bullied down.
I admit, that I even had this discussion with my OH when I was feeling that I didn't want to fight any longer. I remember saying to him in tears "do you think I should just go in and have a c-section, least then it is my choice - I just can't fight it anymore.. and I want my pregnancy and birth to be beautiful, not stressful - why are they doing this to us!" It is awful, esp when it feels like you are getting it from all angles.. even some of my family where against it. (but he's a moron) My OH, He was really supportive, and we fought on, and got what we wanted.
Please don't give up, if a Home birth is what you desire, and you feel you are not at risk - you won't regret it if you get the birth you wanted. It really was the best decision for me. But, you might regret it if you let them make you feel so scared you feel you have little choice but to go in. You'll be one of the ladies back on here pregnant with your next child, telling everyone that will listen, that you wont be bullied again.
Based on what you are telling us, I can't see a single clinical reason for you being in hospital.. above what is a risk for all births.
PPH is a risk for all births. It is far less likely to happen if you labour naturally, you body will turn off the vessels that supplied the placenta, if let alone... and as others have mentioned you could always plan to have the injection after birth to reduce your risks - you can be doing this at home or hospital.
So what would I do??
*I would go to the meeting and get the MW's on your side.
*I would take with me another person, other than my OH, to help you feel secure, and to
*record anything said and/or agreed at the meeting.
*I would follow up the meeting with a letter to all parties, and also copy in the head of your health authority, and your local MP.
*I would at the meeting ask for a letter addressed to you regarding their medical opinions of your birth and the options open to you. This is from your Obst and the MW’s. This is because as soon as you have given birth, your notes which you have been carrying around for months, go with them. Keep a copy of these letters in your notes, and one for your own record.
(I bet you are all thinking this is a bit much. Take from it what you want, it is what I would do, and infact IS what I did - then that's the lawyer in me)
Any support you need, we are all here for you. You have 10 weeks left, I didn't start my little fight till 36weeks - there is along way to go. If you refuse, which you are perfectly entitled to do, then you wouldn't be able to say you were compliant to listen to advice and informed by them. It might make you feel bad, it might make you feel brilliant - you just don't know.
I felt compelled to go to all meetings and appointments set up for me, for all the women that want to labour and birth at home, to make my points, and to educate my Obst - that his view of childbirth is swayed towards complications; as that is his job. I felt that if I couldn't fight the "system" (and I'm not one to be trifled with as far as my rights are concerned) then what hope is there for others?!
Please remember regardless of there thoughts at this meeting.. you can still walk away saying I AM having a homebirth.. They cant stop you. If you are at home and in labour, refusing to go to hospital - the MW's have a duty of care to you, to try to come, if available.
They (that is all the medical professionals - MW's, Obst, even your GP) do however have to cover there own backs.. Just try to see it in this light, and not as something personal.
I was happy to note anywhere that I went against their medical policy. I asked for 2 Obst in different hospitals, to write me letters regarding my HB stating it was policy for me to be induced and birth in the hospital, but also stating, I felt that I would likely labour and birth fine at home, and wishing me every success for my HB.
It's not something that is mentioned much, (..and I don't like to mention it myself) but the reason is because of medial malpractice - and as far as medical malpractice goes a wrongfully performed childbirth is top of the list. There are lots of women who end up feeling so strongly wronged by there clinicians, who owe you a duty of care, they are prepared to sue. If you get what you want on your terms, you won't feel like this.
Also, you can always go in if you plan for a HB, It rarely happens the other way around. (Although, there is nothing legally to stop you from discharging yourself and going home - but whilst in labour.. I feel it is unlikely)
I better stop.. before I make you feel bullied into having a HB!! HAHA! Sorry!
We are all here for you. If you want help drafting a letter to your health authority and/or you MP - I will gladly help. Also, If you feel you would like another representative at this meeting, then I would be happy to attend with you and your OH. However, you might feel better with a trusted friend - Choose someone who isn’t going to be too emotional though. It is good to have another person there to remind you of what you wanted to say, and also to take your own notes of everything that is said - It will make you feel like you have control.. it's not nice thing to have to feel as though you have to do it, but it also makes them wary of what they say to you. They can't been seen to be discouraging you of choice.. Only to make you aware of risks.
Keep strong, you are going to have wobbles.
xxxx
Its a perfectly safe option. Unfortunately It seems that hospitals sometimes have alterior motives for wanting women to have their babies in a very 'medical' way.
So God knows what he is planning on talking about at this meeting? I only live a 10 minute drive away from the hospital, but he insisted on speaking to the senior midwives tomorrow about whether this is viable and how they can accommodate me in the best possible way? Dear God! He also said I am more likely to be transferred into hospital anyway. He wrote in capital letters on my notes that I AM VERY UNHAPPY..
I wish I never went in today..
x x x 
Warn him - say "Nikki will come n kick ur arse if you don't co-operate" lol!! 
On the other hand, if there is evidence out there that a slightly higher than 'standard' BMI poses the increased risks they say, well then they need to let you see that evidence and let you weigh up the risks for yourself and make an informed choice. You're not a child, you're an intelligent adult woman. Your body, your baby, your birth, your choice!
