Horrible day!!

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Third Trimester' started by Alyandherbump, Oct 16, 2008.

  1. Alyandherbump

    Alyandherbump Aly, Adam and baby Lila x

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    I've had a really rubbish day so i feel like ranting for a bit!!

    So it started last night, my mum phoned and asked me and OH to go round there today for a chat. I was really pleased because i thought that maybe she'd finally come round to the idea of me having a baby and maybe even wanted to apologise....no such luck.

    She said she thought i was stupid for having this baby because im too young and that she knows ill be a terrible mother and im not fit to have a child. Grr. Said she doesnt approve of my situation (???) to which i said that this baby would ahve a much better up-bringing than i did because i will show the baby al the love in the world unlike her!!!

    Then she announced that she had rights as the babys nan and that she wanted to have him/her stay with her every other weekend!! Whats all that about!!

    So i went on to have a huge hissy fit about how she doesnt care about me or the baby and is just being spiteful and that she wont ever get to see my baby until she accepts me and my OH being together and bringing up this baby and proves to me that shes not a stupid bloody bitch!!! :hissy:

    Then we got home and had a huge row with OH because he tried to stick up for her saying that at least she was showing an interest!! I tried to explain that she was only trying to hurt us and why the hell should she have out baby for 3 days at a time?? I know i wouldnt want to be apart from my child like that, especially right after birth! He basically told me i was being irrational and stormed off to the pub with his mates!!

    Am i over reacting???

    Plus i have a really rotten cold that i actually think might be a chest infection!! I don't know if its worth going to dr or mw about it as i dont know if it effects the baby??
     
  2. lauriech

    lauriech Well-Known Member

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    Oh hun :hugs: I'm sorry to hear your mum is acting this way. I obviously don't know the full story but she has no right to act this way as far as your story tells.

    I would tell her where to stick it if it was me (and I think your OH should be more understanding). No one should stress you out whilst pregnant, it's not good for you or baby.

    I think you should see your doc or mw about your cold/chest infection too. If you're working, maybe take some time off work to rest.

    Back to the family situation. You are startin your own family and you do not have to give your baby to anyone...they have no right.

    Good luck hun...sorry I'm a bit rubbish with advice but you're more than welcome to PM me if you want to rant!

    :hug:
     
  3. ellasmummy

    ellasmummy Well-Known Member

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    Didnt want to read and run! Hope things improve and you manage to sort it out! :hugs:
     
  4. Alyandherbump

    Alyandherbump Aly, Adam and baby Lila x

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    Thanks guys. I've put quilt and pillow on the sofa so OH will get the picture and sleep down there tonight. Need some me time!! Im not working so time off isnt a problem, i'll ring drs in morning and see if i can get an appointment. I think me and OH will need a chat tomorrow to sort things out. He's usually really good about this stuff anf really careful about upsetting me, lol. I just hope tomorrow is a better day!! Only 4 weeks left and i need to store up some energy lol!!!
     
  5. o0oCharlieo0o

    o0oCharlieo0o Well-Known Member

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    aww hun sounds like an awful day, dont stress over your mum though hun she has no rights to your baby whatsoever, she has never had a relationship with it yet so isnt entitled to a thing, it would be different if you had your baby for years and she had a bond with it then you stopped her seeing it, that is the only way they have any rights and even then its unlikely she would stand a chance! she is just trying to scare you into getting her way, im sure she will calm down and see sense soon enough, hugs to you hun xxx
     
  6. cuddles314

    cuddles314 Proud Mummy to Bobby

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    Aww hun, sorry to hear you've had all this stress. Your Mum can't just demand that bubs stays with her, especially not for such long periods. Your OH is prob just feeling stressed by it all, and will come home all apologetic (hopefully). But stick to your guns. and for what is best for you and YOUR bubs. Hope it gets sorted soon hun.
    xx
    :hug:
     
  7. Sarah88

    Sarah88 Full time working mummy

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    WTF? Ur mum doesn't have rights to ur child! If anything, they're only privleges if the parents so chose. Tell her to go shove it. And as for your OH, he needs a right kicking, he should be sticking up for u, it's not even like it's his mum!
     
  8. ryder

    ryder Mum to Jasmine & Peyton

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    ditto to what sarah88 just posted!

    :hug:
     
  9. Alyandherbump

    Alyandherbump Aly, Adam and baby Lila x

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    Cheers everyone!! Went to doctors today and they dont think i have a chest infection just a bad cold so thats good i guess. I have to rest completely and just try to get over it. Obviously dont want to be stressing out and go into labour lol. Although at this point i dont suppose it would be too bad?! Had a long chat with the OH earlier. He said he was sorry and everything, explained that he just feels a bit overwhelmed with my mum and he really hates people not being pleased with him etc and he always seems to think its just easier to do whatever people want to keep things simple. But i said that im not giving in to her about this and he agreed that we cant let her push us around. So at least thats sorted. Still feel rather ill though :( Hope things will be better in a few days, heavily pregnant and ill is really uncomfortable, im just wanting to lay there all day!! S'pose i should enjoy it while i can!!!
     
  10. redberry3

    redberry3 Love My Little Peek <3

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    sorry you are having such a rough day.

    i think your mum is completely out of line. :grr:

    as for your OH, he should be at home taking care of you, instead of being at the pub and taking your moms side.

    Hope it gets better. maybe call your mw and relax for a little while and maybe take some time off work to get better.

    :hugs:
     
  11. thesockqueen

    thesockqueen 3rd Trimester

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    I'm so sorry to hear your mum is giving you such a hard time! She has absolutely no rights as a grandmother whatsoever (fact...I checked my rights with a solicitor since my ex/father of my child is an arsehole so I felt I needed to :)) and if you don't want your baby to stay with her, then that's final. Since I no longer have an OH to have to run decisions past (and my ex will not be registered on the birth certificate either), I can't offer you much advice on that one, just that like anyone, he should be more supportive and it sounds like he was the one being irrational, not you!
     

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