How do people look at you.................

[shanti01]

Alliecat, I am so sorry that you are judged that way. My parents didn't have much either when they had me, but in the end they made it even though my mom couldn't BF me due to medical difficulties and formula milk were very expensive at the time.

If you and you fiance know that you will cope who has the right then to judge? That counts for the other ladies and including me as well. We should just keep our heads held high.

 

[NewAtThis13]

I most definitely get stared at especially when I go to the mall and I happen to go into a store I used to like to shop at for non maternity style clothes.. all the girls look at me like "why is she in here" plus the constant stares form other people. I also am married, but young 22..so who knows what people think. All that matters is what me, oh, and family think!

 

[spottie2101]

Im 30 but look like a baby and i often get funny looks, my hubby hates it now i am showing as he tells me it makes him look like a wrong one lol

But on the plus side when we are old we will all still look youthful xxxx

 

[JessicaAnne]

I can't wait till I'm showing with this one, I'm 19 (will be 20 when baby's born) but I look about 16 . I know I'm a great mum and do the best I possibly can by Evie and will with this one. I won't stand for people judging me for being young, they don't know me, my life, anything so they can go take their judgemental selves else where !

 

[mavsprtynpink]

No one has EVER made a comment. But I have been given looks. Its better when my husband is with me, and he always says I am just imagining it. But I know when someone is giving me a dirty, evil eye look.
I started to show at like 12 weeks. I am 24 and look young for my age, especially when I dont take the time to put on makeup and just go out in jeans and a tshirt.
Be confident. And to be honest I would ask if there is something you could help them with? I think it would be funny to hear what they had to say.

 

[silverrein]

I can't say that I've received any unnerving looks from people out in town, but I'm 25. Though I get carded everywhere, I haven't noticed anything, but then again, I don't tend to really give other people much thought if they do look at me cross eyed lol!

 

[crimsonsky]

..........................on the street?

I am 23 years old, but look a bit young for my age. Everytime I go to shopping centres or somewhere in the public people will look at my face and then my bump and then nodd. Why??? Really, no need to be so rude and that is even when OH is with me.

Do they do that with you as well and make comments to you as well? It is quite anoying........................

I feel the stares too. However i am 24 and when i go out i am with my fiance 90% of the time. I think the stares come from the fact that we are obviously poor. At the grocery store i was in the checkout line of a pregnant girl and we had to use our WIC and EBT card.. she kept giving us this look of disapporval. She wasnt the first person either! The only reason it really bugs me is because i know they all think my baby was a mistake, or that me and my fiance are nothing serious (i dont blame them i see that a lot, especially in my dr office) However we are just poor and working as hard as we can. And this baby is totally on purpose, wanted by both of us and loved by the whole family. My fiance works two jobs because he dosnt want me working until the baby is here and old enough for me to get a part time job. My MIL has told me if everyone waited until they could afford kids we would die out. I hate the glares though, sometimes i just want to say "do you have a problem with the lower class?".

Im sorry you feel that people think that. Being a good parent is no reflection of your bank balance and no one should make you feel inferior. Values don't come with a price tag and your baby will know so much love some rich kids will never know. Stand proud and look down on those who you feel look down on you they should be pitied.

 

[ashley_gee89]

You know this might sound really sad but I can't wait to get married next month so that when it comes to going into hospital to have Maci, I can say oh, my husband is just on his way with our son. I know this sounds sad but the treatment I got in hosp when I was having my son was unreal!

Unfortunately, people are always going to judge, if your a mum & you look young, and esp. when your partner isn't with you, they stereotype you to someone who has probably never worked, never will etc etc. I think it's sad..

I think what some of these people need to remember is that they don't know our situation just by looking at us AND for those of us who are on benefits, with/without a partner etc, this doesn't make us bad people nor bad parents, again people don't know our situation! We sometimes may only have 20p in our purse but you know what ? - Money doesn't even matter.. It makes life easier, yes, but it's not everything, I'd much rather be in a poor family where I was loved, than a rich one where I was bought!

When I was pregnant with my son.. Me & my fiancee were walking out of the local shopping center, as this woman walked in.. I didn't even notice her tbh. It wasn't until we passed her my OH said "that woman just looked you up and down as if you were dirt" - I said "oh did she now" and turned around to go and say something. Luckily OH stopped me but I was dying to say to her listen Mrs. who the f*** do you think you are! In the end, I was glad I hadn't said anything, I laugh about it now.. how stupid minded some people are amazes me.

I, personally don't think anyone has the right to judge.

 

[cupcakemomma]

Ugh, this happens to me a lot. I'm also 23, but I've always looked younger than my age. The other day at the laundromat, I had a lady kind of look me up and down, roll her eyes and huff, and ask me if this was my first. She then proceeded to ask me if I was married, if I went to school, if I had a job, and how old I was! I just kind of looked at her, and said with kind of a smirk on my face, "Don't you know it's never polite to ask a lady her age?" I was in shock someone would be that bold to ask those kind of questions! It was none of her business. And for the record, I've been married for almost 2 years, graduated from college, work from home, and DH has a good job. The nerve of some people!

I think what makes it sting so much when people think our baby was unplanned (since they think I'm *so* young), is that we went through so much just to have her. I shouldn't have to defend myself to anyone.

 

[LakensMommy11]

Yep...everyone thinks I am like 16. When they act surprised i'm pregnant I really get them when I tell them I already have a 16 month old lol

 

[Sew_Sweet]

I am more worried about the - is she pregnant or just fat so I won't say anything - looks

 

[shanti01]

You know this might sound really sad but I can't wait to get married next month so that when it comes to going into hospital to have Maci, I can say oh, my husband is just on his way with our son. I know this sounds sad but the treatment I got in hosp when I was having my son was unreal!

Unfortunately, people are always going to judge, if your a mum & you look young, and esp. when your partner isn't with you, they stereotype you to someone who has probably never worked, never will etc etc. I think it's sad..

I think what some of these people need to remember is that they don't know our situation just by looking at us AND for those of us who are on benefits, with/without a partner etc, this doesn't make us bad people nor bad parents, again people don't know our situation! We sometimes may only have 20p in our purse but you know what ? - Money doesn't even matter.. It makes life easier, yes, but it's not everything, I'd much rather be in a poor family where I was loved, than a rich one where I was bought!

When I was pregnant with my son.. Me & my fiancee were walking out of the local shopping center, as this woman walked in.. I didn't even notice her tbh. It wasn't until we passed her my OH said "that woman just looked you up and down as if you were dirt" - I said "oh did she now" and turned around to go and say something. Luckily OH stopped me but I was dying to say to her listen Mrs. who the f*** do you think you are! In the end, I was glad I hadn't said anything, I laugh about it now.. how stupid minded some people are amazes me.

I, personally don't think anyone has the right to judge.

OH also saw the people looking at me and now I tend to put my hand with the ring on my tummy when they look Believe me, they look away quite quickly! We will be getting married next month so that I can change my Identity Document and passport for the same reason as that the hospital won't be to nice to me and they will want to put my maiden name on baby instead of OH's surname. That will complicate the registration then.

 

[tiggerz]

I was 23 when I had my first (yrs ago!!) and people did the same to me!! I was also house hunting and unmarried but in a stable relationship with the dad and still am for that matter (and I've married him now) When I was in estate agents for instance they asked my name in this way - Mrs?? I used to reply I am Miss D actually - and they used to look down there noses at me - stuff them!! It's nothing to do with them!! Just because you're young it doesn't mean you're irresponsible or incapable of looking after your baby - please just try and ignore them!!

 

[ilovebabybean]

I remember asking for a train fare on the train from a station with no machine not cos im a ticket cheat lol 7 years ago and he issued me a child ticket, i didnt notice til i got to the barriers at the station and i was a heavily pregnant 22 year old!!! Used to get more comments than looks behind my back from people that i just met cos i look younger than i am asking others if i was old enough to have a child etc!!! Sometimes people still seem shocked i have kids and im 29 knocking on 30!! If people stare il just stare back...some people are just odd, who cares who i am or how old i am, its non of their business why let it get to them that much lol!!! xx

 

[MoniG]

might be an american thing?
Here in Canada when women see me pregnant (i'm 24) they run up to me and say congrats or they will smile and try to make small talk about the baby.

I don't think any of you should let those looks get to you cause it sounds like those people should be shamed passing judgment on an expecting mom, they're just haters and simply that.

I mean I would give someone a dirty look if they were smoking with a bottle of vodka while pregnant.

 

[Lisa83]

I was 18 when I had my first baby boy, and although he came a few years earlier than I had planned, I had been with my partner for 3 1/2 years so had nothing to be ashamed of .. I looked after my baby myself and had gave up all the things a normal 18 year old should be doing and didnt mind in the slightest ...

Unfortunately I ended up in hospital for a couple of weeks during my pregnancy and there was one particular lady in the antinatal ward who made me feel really uncomfortable, she gave me horrible looks and dissapointing tuts, this lady was in her late 30's .. after a few days of feeling like this I broke down and confided in a few of the other women on the ward about how she was making me feel .. And was very shocked at their responce ...

Turns out this lady who was looking down her nose at me was pregnant with her 6th child, the other 5 had been taken off her and put into care and she was in hospital until birth to wean her off Heroin so her baby wasnt born addicted too, this baby was also being taken into care at birth ..

Basically from that day on I never allowed ANYONE make me feel bad about being a young mum .. I would never have chosen to have a baby at that age but it happened, me and my partner stayed together until he was tragically killed in an accident at work, but we worked hard and raised our children without asking for help from anyone .. And im proud to say I now have raised 2 beautiful children who know what love is, are well mannered and who im very very proud of ..

Can all mums say the same ?? No if every baby in the world had even a fraction of the love that has been given to my children then the world would be a much better place !!

Enjoy ur pregnancy and forget all the busy bodys who have nothing better to judge xxx

 

[mummy2be362]

..........................on the street?

I am 23 years old, but look a bit young for my age. Everytime I go to shopping centres or somewhere in the public people will look at my face and then my bump and then nodd. Why??? Really, no need to be so rude and that is even when OH is with me.

Do they do that with you as well and make comments to you as well? It is quite anoying........................

I turned 22 this year, and also find that I'm getting "the look". I'd say I look about my age, but I'm living in my joggers and baggy "chav" comfy clothing, which I don't think helps.

On the bus I sit near the front, and if the bus begins filling up I get dodgy looks from elderly folk. Theres a lot of mumbles but I ignore it

I don't feel ashamed. My and my OH planned our baby, and we're more than capble! Just being put under the label "young mum" doesn't mean unable to look after a baby!

 

[SouthernC]

I get strange looks from some, mostly middle aged women actually, usually the elderly women just look and smile. I had one elderly man come in where I work with his wife, and theres no hiding my bump and they just smile and ask me about my pregnancy, as there leaving he looks at me and says "Whens the blessed event" it was so sweet .