How I will cope this month

[CapitalChick]

I don't mean to suggest that by 'coping' I'll be coping 'well'....but I'm going to try and make this next cycle more bearable than the last two (this last one was certainly better than the one before).

I'm currently studying in a school in Israel. Think of it as a religious/personal development program. It has really allowed me to spend a lot of time thinking about my journey with TTC, why I'm being made to wait for my BFP, and what it all means. I've become determined to use my waiting time wisely and try...really really try (although not necessarily consider it a failure if I'm not successful) at making myself less crazy in the coming month(s) while I wait for my BFP.

First off, I really want to internalize my belief that God will give me my BFP when the time is right. There's a reason I'm meant to wait. It might very well be that I need more time to make myself the person I need to be in order to be a good mother.
My major flaws, as I know them, are:
-I'm extremely impatient. Very. Very. Impatient. This might explain why I'm finding TTC excruciating. I want to work on this. I'm going to keep a journal, get massages and try yoga. Hopefully this will help me chill out.

I've also made a list of things I've been meaning to do/accomplish, but have put on the backburner while we've been TTC. I don't know how/why I've allowed my entire life to STOP, just because we're TTC and it has taken more than one month.
This month I hope to:
-Try about 5 new recipes I've been meaning to make,
-Get my vacation photography organized, processed, and mounted on our apartment walls.
-Swim twice a week and join a yoga class
-Cook and freeze three meals for my friends, who are due to have their baby next week!!
-Stuff my fridge full of fresh, washed and cut up fruits and veggies for me to snack on so that I'll lose weight!

I'm hoping these things will keep me busy and keep me sane while I wait for my BFP.

 

[pixielou]

Hi Capital Chick!

I agree and alot of the things that you have said ring true with me. I have been so tied up in this that now I'm trying to take a step back and start doing other things to take my mind off it. It can be so consuming that even though you don't feel particularly stressed you are?!?

I had my hsg last week and the doctor that I saw said that positive thinking really helps and that prayer was a good idea! It was weird a doctor saying this to me cos normally they are very into the scientific approach(obviously) but her way of explaining it to me was that praying effects the part of the brain that controls hormones etc (the hypothalmus). Anyway which ever way you look at it, taking a step back and enjoying life and relaxing and prayer- if they help then that obviously a good thing.

 

[Arcanegirl]

Theres so many things i put on hold with the "what ifs" but i put a stop to it and carried on with my life. I still have the what if thoughts but now they are accompanied with "ill deal wiht it when that happens"
TTC is a hard journey no matter how long or short it is and it is very easy to get caught up in it all.

 

[CapitalChick]

Ahhh...thanks for reminding me...that's a huge thing on my list of things to do this month....pray!
I know that, for many, it sounds silly, but I prayed a couple of days last month, and it REALLY helped me feel better. In the Jewish prayers, these a great deal of repetition about how God opens His hand to his children and gives them what they truly need...all at the right time. I found this to be incredibly comforting (of course, it's written much better than I just did!). Anyway, I'm definitely going to meditate/pray more this month....if for no other reason than it makes me feel better.

 

[Arcanegirl]

If nothing else it will be good for relaxation

 

[Mervs Mum]

Prayers are wonderful. Ask, believe, receive....

 

[TrixieLox]

This post has really inspired me. I too need to get a grip and STOP spending 99% of my waking hours focusing on TTCing. So my list is:

- Go to church more
- Concentrate on my writing outside of work - write at least 3,000 words of my novel per week, write my grandad's story for his birthday and 2-3 articles for my friend's new e-zine
- Continue with my healthy eating and lose half a stone; that includes laying off the weekly visits to restaurants and chocolate splurges
- Save money
- Exercise at least 3 times a week: swim, long walks, team sports, exercise DVDs, start biking into work
- Focus more at work on keeping myself busy
- Only allow myself to check this website once every 2 days for an hour after work (sorry gals, I find this website makes me even more neurotic sometimes! But I love hearing all your news so will still need my dose every other day)
- Lock away my pregnancy books
- Don't say the word 'symptom' cos now I've had them ALL so now I know the only one that's true is a missed period.

(sorry for hijacking this post Capital Chick)

 

[avistar]

Good things to think about CapitalChick! I hope you are enjoying things on your trip and I do believe that you will be blessed with a child when the time is right, for whatever purpose or reason. I believe this for everyone. Even people that fall preg who do not want children...it is a lesson for them and the child...such is life!

I have been trying to get on with things too while ttc and have been a lot better this month, compared to other times.

Best to all and remember that no matter what happens with ttc, take it as a learning and growing experience I know I have!

 

[CapitalChick]

TrixieLox,
I'm so glad that you were inspired. No worries...you certainly did not 'highjack' this post.
I think we should all share ideas about how to keep busy and sane while TTC. I have to admit that, while I didn't write it in my post, I too am going to lay off this site. There is simply no denying that spending 3 hours a day on B&B, is NOT helpful in keeping your mind off TTC.
I also wanted to agree with you that it's so much better when you REFUSE to allow yourself to keep track of 'symptoms'. I forced myself to just get up and go each day and not pay attention so much to my body. It helped that I felt few 'symptoms' this month. In the end, I really was aware of how much my boobs hurt me...but instead of focussing on that for a full 16 days, I was really just thinking about it for about 4 days before AF. I think it helped me stay sane this month.

While, of course, I hope and pray that this month will be my month, I am mentally gearing up for a few more months TTC. I know many people are thinking "a few??? It could take up to a year more...or longer!". But the thought of TTC for a year is totally daunting, so I'm just preparing mentally for 2-3 more months...and we'll take it from there.

Anyway, best of luck, ladies. See you all on B&B soon!!