ser523
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Ok, so DH and I have been waiting to tell our family we're pregnant until after our first prenatal appointment (due to two mc's last year). And our appointment is Monday, so family telling time is approaching. I have cute ideas for almost everyone - his parents, my sister, my two close friends. I've actually been bursting to tell lately!
My dilemma, though, is my mom. She's made numerous comments in the past about how we should wait to have kids, it's too early, I should have a job for like three years before we have kids.
I mean logically, it's fine that we're pregnant now. It's a little ahead of our original life schedule, as we had originally planned to start trying in May and into the summer. And yes, it would be great if I had a full time job and that income security, but DH has a decent paying job and who knows when I'll finally be able to get a full time teaching gig again (I had a teaching job, but had to leave when we got married and I moved three states away to be with DH). And I had a health scare earlier this year with an abnormal pap and precancerous cells on my cervix. I ended up having a procedure to sort it out, but it made me very aware of wanting get started on our family. (She doesn't know this last bit though, as I didn't tell her)
Anyway, I don't know how to go about telling my mom. I mean I know she loves me and wants the best, but things never really come out that way. (Honestly, she's pretty verbally abusive) I could go on and on about her life circumstances that have made her this way, but I won't here. So she's 4 hours away, which sort of eliminates the idea of an in person announcement. And I don't know how well a surprise gift (like I have for my sister - I'm going to mail her a cup that says "only the best sisters get promoted to aunt") would go over. But, I also don't know how to just drop that on the phone. One, because what do you say, "oh, by the way, we're pregnant"? And two, she tends to immediately start talking about herself and her problems whenever I call her.
Do any of you have/expect less than supportive reactions from family/people in your life? How did you/do you plan to tell them the news? How did they react?
My dilemma, though, is my mom. She's made numerous comments in the past about how we should wait to have kids, it's too early, I should have a job for like three years before we have kids.
I mean logically, it's fine that we're pregnant now. It's a little ahead of our original life schedule, as we had originally planned to start trying in May and into the summer. And yes, it would be great if I had a full time job and that income security, but DH has a decent paying job and who knows when I'll finally be able to get a full time teaching gig again (I had a teaching job, but had to leave when we got married and I moved three states away to be with DH). And I had a health scare earlier this year with an abnormal pap and precancerous cells on my cervix. I ended up having a procedure to sort it out, but it made me very aware of wanting get started on our family. (She doesn't know this last bit though, as I didn't tell her)
Anyway, I don't know how to go about telling my mom. I mean I know she loves me and wants the best, but things never really come out that way. (Honestly, she's pretty verbally abusive) I could go on and on about her life circumstances that have made her this way, but I won't here. So she's 4 hours away, which sort of eliminates the idea of an in person announcement. And I don't know how well a surprise gift (like I have for my sister - I'm going to mail her a cup that says "only the best sisters get promoted to aunt") would go over. But, I also don't know how to just drop that on the phone. One, because what do you say, "oh, by the way, we're pregnant"? And two, she tends to immediately start talking about herself and her problems whenever I call her.
Do any of you have/expect less than supportive reactions from family/people in your life? How did you/do you plan to tell them the news? How did they react?