Hows your relatioship after loss?

[xxxjessxxx]

I hope it will - so do you think your partner will be a lot better afterwards? Or do you think after your heart to heart he'll stay a good'en?
Haha Ohhh my, we have alotta lot in common So where abouts is the west midlands lol. Im absolutely awful with geography
Oh my god!!! Does he not have one day off atleast??!?!?!
I couldn't do that, I thought my OH's hours were bad enough!! Poor u hunny!!! That must be awwwful!!
Yep I'm always bored. I try to think of stuff to do but can't, should find a hobbie really :/ What about you? x x x

 

[AEM1803]

Its a very hard situation to be in- When he used to be my rock and be the optomist- then after the ectopic its like he started to resent me because of it- he started getting angry and being rude to me and he was never like that before..

I hope that once i get pregnant again he will go back to being my rock because im going to be scared

 

[katie21188]

im going to be really scared in my next pregnancy to hopefully we are all pregnant together at the same time. that would be good to get through it together

 

[xxxjessxxx]

It definitely is hard AEM1803 and katie21188, but we'll get through it I guess, just taks time
And yes, that would be good if we all got pregnant the same time x x

 

[stephanie1990]

hi, sorry for the late reply, my dam internet stopped working yesterday

not had a good day so far just went to see the nurse because since the mc i spot now and again throughout my cycle i had swabs done a few months ago and they were all clear, but im still spotting, on ,my last cycle i was spotting from day 15 onwards while i was seeing the nurse. she noticed that i had a little bit of blood around the cervix

i dont want anything to be wrong but i cant help but worry

i have to admit so far, after the heart to heart we have been very close, but its still early to tell whether or not things have changed, but so far this month, we are really relaxed and defo not stressed so fingers crossed for resluts

im from dudley in the west midland, its kinda cute, got a little castle in the town lol

no he hasnt got a day off hes even working xmas eve hes off on xmas day and boxing day and thats it, looks like ill be watching my xmas movies to myself

i want a hobby too, but i can never think of one xxx

 

[xxxjessxxx]

Oh dear I'm sorry to hear that hunny
I'm sure everything will be fine In a positive note, if they did find something wrong (fx'd they dont of course) atleast it may give you help with TTC or you may find a way to prevent a possible future miscarriage. Could just be an infection that's easily solved with antibiotics
I'm glad things are changing so far for you Is he being supportive at the moment?
Oh, I have no idea where dudley is lol, but we have a castle in our town too
Ahh, we could virtually watch one together lol
Yeah me too, what kind of things do you like doing?
Got any further in the outlook of finding a new job? x x x

 

[stephanie1990]

ye thats true, the first time i had swabs done, they found a very slight infenction and the doctor told me that if i wasnt ttc then he wouldnt of given me anything for it, and then when i had a follow up, they told me that the infection had gone, iv changed doctors in the last month and my new doctor wanted new tests done just for her peace of mind, i am thinking happy thought but i still worry now and again

well he is being supportive atm, he gets very very very stressed at work, hes one of these people that everything can get to him, but all in all hes been ok when hes home, i think this week will be the test

aw i love castles lol, whhats your town called??

aw we could wacth one virtually lol, i love a good xmas film

urgh, theres nothing on the job front, i spend most of my time looking for work, but theres nothing, i dont drive so i have to look for jobs on a bus route etc, and its so hard how about you??

i like doing most things tbh, sometimes i can be really outgoing, other times, im probably the most boring person ever lol , you??

xxx

 

[xxxjessxxx]

Aww atleast your new doctor actually sounds like a good doctor and doing what they're supposed to do! My doctor's useless
It's ok to worry about it though hunny, it's natural, but atleast it's not being left and somethings being done
Im so glad it's still going fab for you!! Woohoo!! I sent my OH a flirtacious text today seems to have worked wonders though, so Im not complaining
It's called Colchester Castle People visit it from everywhere because it's very historical or something lol (I feel bad because I don't really know!) It's the typical year 6 school trip lol
Haha yeah, snuggled with a hot chocolate and mini marshmallows and cream...mmm - what's your all time favourite christmas film?
Same, I don't drive either :/ Most jobs need you to drive too so it's a bit of a bummer Applied for a job today, one at a nursery in town, and another related to a science technician?!?! lol... i've been applying for anything recently!
Yeah, I have my spurts too. SOmetimes I want to be social, other times I want to stay in my cocoon :/
I definitely want to find a hobbie though - do you like doing artistic things? x x x

 

[stephanie1990]

ye thats the best thing about it to be honest, me and my oh moved into together in june and theres a big doctors down the road so i decided to swap cause my old doctor was so rubbish

awww bless, good for you!! i do the same somethings, thats men for you, they love lots of love and affection, there big softys deep down

ye i heard of that castle lol, im the same, dudley castle is on a hill and its surrounded by a zoo, so iv always got distracted by the cute little animals lol

i love hot chocolate and marshmellows, i have one everynight lol,

erm i love all xmas films, i like the cute ones, like the santa clause etc, they always get me in the mood and excited for xmas, im like a big kid

what about you??

ye i like artistic things, im not good at art though, tbh i have spurts of things that interest me, one time i like something, i next time i hate it

xxx

 

[xxxjessxxx]

Yeh mine was naff! especially when I went through my first miscarriage!
So what's it like living with your OH?
Aha yes, it's definitely worked Better than the usual 'hows work' texts
Awwww I love zoo's!! Me and OH said we're going to try going to more zoo's. Colchester Zoo is nice, it's a good attraction but we want to go to more! Banham zoo is the best one I've been to so far Might have to check out your zoo sometime
I love animals My favourite animals are monkeys The babies are too cute!! What's your favourite?
Everynight?!?!?!? Oh my!! Your sooooo lucky! I wish I could :/ But it's kind of a christmas thing lol.
Haha the santa claus is class I have to say, I love the Grinch ALways makes me giggle, or the classic Jingle bells. I love being a big kid
What's some of your favourite films then?
Ahh, I was going to say, if you like being artistic it opens up a lot of doors I love doing art, but I have to be in the mood.
I started making a anniversary book for OH as a present on our anniversary. It's got lots of things in like tickets, n looads of things i've collected from things over our year together Only thing is I haven't done it for a while and our anniversary is in 4 days
What about making a scrapbook or artistic diary of your day to day life? x x x

 

[stephanie1990]

when we first moved in, it was hell, arguments night after night, we had so much to do with the place,painting etc, its was horrid, i really dont know how we lasted

but over the last month it has become better, when we first started dated i really thought he was a clean freak but omg i have learnt that he is messy lol

iv never heard of that zoo before, might have to check it out

i have a really bad fear of .......... monkeys

i use to dream about them when i was little, that they would eat me etc lol
whenever i go to the zoo and see a monkey, i swear i have a nightmare about them, my stupid head lol I love meerkats, i think they are soooo cute

i love the crinch too, i love all xmas films, esp when its frezzing outside and chucking it down with snow

i watch all types of flims, my oh is a film addict, theres one on everynight, how about you??

that present for your anniversary is the nicest idea iv ever heard!!!!
its so sweet!!! me and my oh have got our anniversary on bonfire night, god knows what im gunna get him

a scrap book is an awsome idea!! thank you!!! is that what you do?

xxx

 

[wantingagirl]

The problem with me and my hubby is he talked about it and was upset when it happened but now he doesnt want to speak about it anymore. He would rather not talk about it wheras I do but we came to a compromise. We had so many arguments where I thought he thought was my fault and that he wasnt even bothered but he had a melt down and admitted that he was just trying to be a man, that was the turning point for us and nearly 8 months since our loss so we are getting there now. I hope things get sorted soon as its not fair trying to upset you, ur going through enough

 

[stephanie1990]

The problem with me and my hubby is he talked about it and was upset when it happened but now he doesnt want to speak about it anymore. He would rather not talk about it wheras I do but we came to a compromise. We had so many arguments where I thought he thought was my fault and that he wasnt even bothered but he had a melt down and admitted that he was just trying to be a man, that was the turning point for us and nearly 8 months since our loss so we are getting there now. I hope things get sorted soon as its not fair trying to upset you, ur going through enough

i know what you mean, my oh is like it too, sometimes he will talk about it, but only for like 5 mins then he will tell me, he doesnt want to speak about it anymore and that its to the back of his mind,

im sorry for your loss, lots of baby dust and support to you

 

[xxxjessxxx]

when we first moved in, it was hell, arguments night after night, we had so much to do with the place,painting etc, its was horrid, i really dont know how we lasted

but over the last month it has become better, when we first started dated i really thought he was a clean freak but omg i have learnt that he is messy lol

iv never heard of that zoo before, might have to check it out

i have a really bad fear of .......... monkeys

i use to dream about them when i was little, that they would eat me etc lol
whenever i go to the zoo and see a monkey, i swear i have a nightmare about them, my stupid head lol I love meerkats, i think they are soooo cute

i love the crinch too, i love all xmas films, esp when its frezzing outside and chucking it down with snow

i watch all types of flims, my oh is a film addict, theres one on everynight, how about you??

that present for your anniversary is the nicest idea iv ever heard!!!!
its so sweet!!! me and my oh have got our anniversary on bonfire night, god knows what im gunna get him

a scrap book is an awsome idea!! thank you!!! is that what you do?

xxx

Ahh they say there's always a lot of arguements when you first move in OH lives with me, but it's still with my mum so I don't know whether he finds it more stressful than if we had our own? As obviously it isn't all as free willed, and it's hard to have privacy
Lol you fell for that cleaning trick too? They sly aren't they? lol On our first date OH's place was spotless lol! But like you say, you soon see their true messy side
What banham zoo?? It's lovely, the animals are so much happier and more freedom, at Colchester zoo they all look depressed... poor things
Haha we've found something we don't have in common!!! haha, I love'em
Ohhh meerkats are gorgeous too at Colchester zoo they have a lovely enclosure and if you go at the right time there's always looads of babies!! they're adorable
I see your picture of a dog - I'm guessing it's yours? What gender is it and what's it name? Is it a border terrier?? Cos funnily enough I have a border terrier crossed patterdale Yours is a beaut!! have you any other animals?
Yeahh! They definitely get you in the mood for xmas!! woohoo!! lol
Yeh I like films, any tbh. Dont ever think to watch one though, my brothers trying to persuade me to watch I Love You Philip Morris at the moment lol.
Ahh thanks hun, except I need to get my butt into gear and get it done lol
No problem, it can help express your feelings, it's something to do, it's not something you have to be glued to (well not literally anyway )
And it's something you could always show the kids one day too if you wanted too x x x

 

[stephanie1990]

I actually miss my mom and dads

i miss the my moms cooking and cleaning lol, its not fun now i have to do it all

i love the little meerkats, they have a cute enclousre at dudley zoo and lots of little babies there, so cute

he is my dog, he is named scooby, hes so cute, but he can be a little grumpy, that picture was taken last xmas day, cause in my house, my mom always make sure you have xmas hats on etc lol .

he is cross with a shih tzu and a westie

i have two other pets, to fish, there names are scampi and eggburt, i know really strange names

i do love the idea of a scrapbook, im defo gunna start one, i think my oh will love the idea too. i write in a fertility diary, but atm theres highs and lows in there, sometime it is nice to look back on good days, but you can come onto to depresssing days too xxx

 

[xxxjessxxx]

Haha your mum cooked and cleaned??!
I pay rent, and I have to buy everything I use from food to fabric conditioner and clean :/ Atleast It'l b no different when I have my own place i guess :/ lol
Naww I so have to go to dudley zoo one time I'ma google it when I get the cance to see how far away it is As can't atm as Im in a bit of rush Cos OH will be home in bout an hour so gotta make sure everythings ready.
Aww he's just adorable!! I love shih tzu's When I move out I want to get a Bichon Frese They're adorable!
Haha they're awsome names for fish!! We name our animals strange names too We had fish once (we've had looads actually) but we called one lot.. Fish 1 and Fish 2, cos my mum used to say if 1 died we still got 2 Except 2 died 1st lol
We've had looads of animals at one point, but we're down to a dog called Riza, a cat called Mr Moaw, and a cat called Midget (they have a reason for they're names lol) and a fish that we had in our pond, except god no if he's still alive Have one rat (did have 2) called Morphy
I'm glad it's a great idea
And sometimes life is part of the bad days too :/ I used to have a diary and everytime I re-read something bad I wrote I used to rip it out. I realised afterwards, there's a positive thing about them as it shows you got over those bad days which makes you stronger And if someone did have a diary that never contained something bad I'd think they'd not be all telling the truth tbh lol.
I think I'm going to start one too
It'll give our OH's a chance to maybe understand us more too, without having to actually explain it so much x x x

 

[stephanie1990]

wow, it really wont be different when you get your place, good for you

i love Bichon Frese , they are sooooo cute, good choice!!!

aw i love fish lol, plus they are really easy to look after, i miss my dog cause he stayed with my mom when i moved out, i live in an apartment and dogs wasnt allowed , i miss him on days like this, where its really sunny, i love taking him for long walks, he has only got little legs so he gets tired really easy bless him lol.

im just like you!! i always use to ripp out bad days i diarys, but now i do look back and think, was it such a bad day?? and i try to think about any happy parts to that particular day. i try and stay positive

i think our oh's would totally understand our feelings in they read a diary

my oh read my fertility diary the oh when i was out, it got stuff like what day im on etc, he was amazed at how i take the time out to chart lol

xxx

 

[CARNAT22]

I have to say M/C has only made things better. Cliched as that sounds..

It was an unplanned pregnancy [we were using condoms] and occured when OH returned from a 2 week trip away. I had only been off the pill for a month so it was pretty unexpected but we were both delighted. We both told our (large) families and a few friends but sadly I started spotting just 5 days after BFP.

We had to wait 3 weeks for M/C to occur, but OH was amazing - he came to EPU with me every time and came in for my scans etc..

Emotionally he was a lot more stable than I was and a lot more philisophical about it all.. Which drove me crazy at the time (he would say things like "at least it happened now and not later on", "at least it occured naturally" etc..) he always tried to make me see the 'positive' side.

We both decided that once my cycle went back to normal we would be NTNP and things went pretty much back to normal ...

We've since had a chemical pregnancy, again OH was very philisophical about it and again drove me nuts BUT I appreciate that he was trying to be the strong, brave person and I also appreciate that he doesn't want me to wallow and always 'want' what we no longer 'have'

We are now TTC and I look forward to this chapter in our relationship

 

[xxxjessxxx]

wow, it really wont be different when you get your place, good for you

i love Bichon Frese , they are sooooo cute, good choice!!!

aw i love fish lol, plus they are really easy to look after, i miss my dog cause he stayed with my mom when i moved out, i live in an apartment and dogs wasnt allowed , i miss him on days like this, where its really sunny, i love taking him for long walks, he has only got little legs so he gets tired really easy bless him lol.

im just like you!! i always use to ripp out bad days i diarys, but now i do look back and think, was it such a bad day?? and i try to think about any happy parts to that particular day. i try and stay positive

i think our oh's would totally understand our feelings in they read a diary

my oh read my fertility diary the oh when i was out, it got stuff like what day im on etc, he was amazed at how i take the time out to chart lol

xxx

Yeah hopefully lol!! It's a kind of make or break thing I guess. But we have a lot of arguements because he stresses about money, and obviously that's a big stress when moving into your own place
Haha thank you OH wants a staffy or alsation though :/
Aww bless him, so is he far away from you? Otherwise you could have days where you walk with him

I'm glad you see the positive side! Was a bit too late for me lol, but I'll learn from my mistakes

Aww that's sweet of him It shows how interested he is if he took the time to read it My OH isn't being supportive at the moment

When you planning on starting this scrapbook then? x x x

ps. If it isn't too cheeky do you have facebook?

 

[xxxjessxxx]

I have to say M/C has only made things better. Cliched as that sounds..

It was an unplanned pregnancy [we were using condoms] and occured when OH returned from a 2 week trip away. I had only been off the pill for a month so it was pretty unexpected but we were both delighted. We both told our (large) families and a few friends but sadly I started spotting just 5 days after BFP.

We had to wait 3 weeks for M/C to occur, but OH was amazing - he came to EPU with me every time and came in for my scans etc..

Emotionally he was a lot more stable than I was and a lot more philisophical about it all.. Which drove me crazy at the time (he would say things like "at least it happened now and not later on", "at least it occured naturally" etc..) he always tried to make me see the 'positive' side.

We both decided that once my cycle went back to normal we would be NTNP and things went pretty much back to normal ...

We've since had a chemical pregnancy, again OH was very philisophical about it and again drove me nuts BUT I appreciate that he was trying to be the strong, brave person and I also appreciate that he doesn't want me to wallow and always 'want' what we no longer 'have'

We are now TTC and I look forward to this chapter in our relationship

I'm sorry to hear of your two losses
It's nice to hear your OH was supportive though, even at times when he did frustrate you lol, they never seem to understand!
I have my fx'd for you that you will be more than successful in your TTC
Thanks for the advise hun x x