I DONT KNOW WAT TO DO!!

[angel666_cade]

I NEED HELP FROM ALOT OF PEOPLE BECAUSE I REALLY DUNNO WHAT TO DO!
im a 17 yr old gurl 18 when i would have the baby,with alot of ambitions and alot i want to do in my life and im also a member of my sea cadets and i have alot of responsibilitys
you know something i didnt even find out myself first, my mum found out for me and i really dislike her for this, what do you think mums could you do this to your daughter. the way she done it was bt sayin that after my sedations at the dentist i had to pee in the pot , but really it was to see if i was pregant.
well anyway i went to my local brook clinque and i got my next apoitment for abortion but all my family are very strong christians and are veyr against me, also my bf is telling me that he will stick by me but i really dont know what to do. please help me x

 

[Jayden'sMummy]

I NEED HELP FROM ALOT OF PEOPLE BECAUSE I REALLY DUNNO WHAT TO DO!
im a 17 yr old gurl 18 when i would have the baby,with alot of ambitions and alot i want to do in my life and im also a member of my sea cadets and i have alot of responsibilitys
you know something i didnt even find out myself first, my mum found out for me and i really dislike her for this, what do you think mums could you do this to your daughter. the way she done it was bt sayin that after my sedations at the dentist i had to pee in the pot , but really it was to see if i was pregant.
well anyway i went to my local brook clinque and i got my next apoitment for abortion but all my family are very strong christians and are veyr against me, also my bf is telling me that he will stick by me but i really dont know what to do. please help me x

First of all congratulations!
all i can say is think of both sides abortion or keeping. as you already know if you was going to keep it your mum, family + most of all boy friend would stand by you, so you wouldn't be on your own and you could still have a career and make something of yourself it will just take a few extra years to get there. but if you want to make something of yourself first and know when your ready and then start having kids in a few years time... the choice is yours just make sure you know in your heart + head your making the decision thats right for you.
xx

 

[angel666_cade]

thankyou rachel, i just really do not know what to do. i hope everything is good with your baby. how did your mum and dad act when they found out but congrats hun x

 

[ella170]

im 17 too, still at school, catholic n also have lots of ambitions in my life. last month i posted on here something similar to u, because i was so stuck between keeping the baby and having an abortion. i spent weeks thinking about it and at one point was very close to deciding in having an abortion. but, deep down i knew i would regret it when im older- i fort 'what if i cant have kids when im older?' i believe everything happens for a reason nd so i decided to keep the baby, cos some ppl spend years trying for a baby nd i got pregnant while still being really careful! im still shittin it and ive started thinking about adoption, but im happy i can give my baby life. gd luck in ur decision, i hope u choose whats best for u xxx

 

[Jayden'sMummy]

thankyou rachel, i just really do not know what to do. i hope everything is good with your baby. how did your mum and dad act when they found out but congrats hun x

I didnt know what to do at first it took me 6 weeks makin my mind up, in fact it took me to be sittin in the abortion clinic room adn watchin every girl cum out holdin ther stomach cryin there eyes out an thats when i realised i cudnt get rid of my baby.
Jaydens (baby) is doin really good, doesnt stop movin long enough for me to keep comfy like haha! only got 12 weeks left til am in pain (LABOUR -- AHHH!) haha.
my auntie told my mum an she went mad bu when me mum saw how scared i was she hugged me an asked if i was ok bu i knew how disappointed she was because im only 16. my dad on the other hand (not goin into detail) i dont really speak to him because of our past together but he knows and he doesnt care but i dont care about him so it evens out haha.

xx

 

[angel666_cade]

oh i see, well my mum and dad know and i knt really speak 2 my mum because she is wel out of order 4 doin what she did to me. wow so you was in the abortion clinque, that must have been scary yeah i just dont know what to do, my bf was like if you dont want it i wil take it off ur hands as soon as its born and all dis lol.

well ella im 10wks aswel lol, so much in common lol, so really you dont know what your stil going to do, i just dont want to regreat having the baby wen i dont think i want it but then again i dont think i want to live with the
WHAT IF!!!

 

[Jayden'sMummy]

oh i see, well my mum and dad know and i knt really speak 2 my mum because she is wel out of order 4 doin what she did to me. wow so you was in the abortion clinque, that must have been scary yeah i just dont know what to do, my bf was like if you dont want it i wil take it off ur hands as soon as its born and all dis lol.

Lol wish my babys dad would even offer that! nah i dont really i love my baby already, sounds mad tha i used to say id never av kids but now am like awww i love my baby n tha haha.
yeh your mum was out of order because she should av spoke to u about it first and then got you to do a test wen you was redii.
xx

 

[angel666_cade]

hun your baby has you and that is the best thing about it

 

[ella170]

do u know how far the baby is developed at 10 weeks? have a look on the internet if u dont cos after knowing tht, i wouldnt be able to have an abortion now. sorry, im not tryna put u off having an abortion, it might just be worth looking at now rather than later. im thinking about adoption because that way my life doesnt have to change (apart from no smoking n drinking while pregnant) and my baby can be looked after by a couple who are going to give my baby everything he/she could want and give it things tht i cant. i dont know if ill be able to give it away though, cos i dont know how im gonna feel in 7 months time!
u will automatically love the baby if u have it because its just a natural feeling tht mothers feel. i know wat u mean about the what if... but then if u had the baby u could also think, what if...
its such a hard situation to go through at such a young age and last month, i was changing my mind literally every hour.
10 weeks too yh? did u concieve on valentines day aswell lol?x

 

[angel666_cade]

yeah well it was a nice day lol, so wen urs due then because i got told it will be nov. yeah adopting is a good thing to do aswel bcause your helping another family out but what about when the baby was older what would you say and yeah as you say who knows what you feel in 7mnths time its quite long lol.
i just read your little diagram and i just dont know what to do
arghhhhh

 

[ella170]

mines due november 6th lol. if i gave it up for adoption, i would write a letter for the baby to read when its around 16 and tell my baby why i had to give it up for adoption and tht if things had of been different then i would have kept him/her, etc..
i no! its got to be one of the biggest dilemmas anyone could ever face. what do ur parents think about the whole thing?x

 

[angel666_cade]

i dont really know wat my parents tink, day wont tell me anythin really. my mum is getting far 2 involved nd i actually hate it but hey wel im off to work so speak later .
i hate it that i have 2 go work when i feel so crap x

 

[polo_princess]

You have 2 do what is best ofr you and the baby and no one else.

No one else is going to be raising it apart from you. I think you need to have a serious think sweetie and dont make any rushed decisions.

I knwo it seems like your mum is sticking her nose in but you are still her "baby" and im sure she only wants whats best for you. Talk 2 her and tell her what you think

Good luck

 

[nikky0907]

If you feel stong about having an abortion don't let people who have nothing to do with this stop you.

I'm 18,I thought about it too.I mean I have ambitions,I started college in the fall and I was scared that I won't be able to finish it but I worked it out with my guidance counselor.
But I'm definitely keeping it now,I love it so much and I'm very happy.Even though I'm no longer in touch with my parents...

Do whats best for you...

 

[Becki77]

Hi you really need to do what you feel is right. This is no body elses decision.
I gave the same advice to ella afew weeks ago, 9 years ago i was in the same situation as you, 16 at school doing my exams and i fell pregnant. I told my mum and she was fantastic, said she would look after the baby for me so i could still go to uni etc but the decision was mine and i decided not to keep the baby. I never thought of it as a baby and never told the father- until it was too late!
Years later i got married and due to complications from the termination i was told my chances of ever conceiving again were low, so i am lucky to have fallen pregnant- although it was a huge shock!!
Ultimately it is your decision, you are the one who will be bringing up the baby unless you decide on adoption- which of course is fantastic for people who really cant have children.
I do need to tell you though that the nhs will only do terminations upto 12 weeks so you really dont have much time.
You may find people will judge you if you have a termination but they are not in your situation- ignore them.
Good luck, i hope all goes well for you whatever you decide xx

P.s- i wouldnt change the chance of becoming a mum now for the world, its a great feeling!!!

 

[leeanne]

The choice is ultimately yours honey. Although I never fell pregnant in my teens, I can understand how scary it must be and of all the decisions on what is best for you and baby.

There truly should be more support groups for teenage pregnancies and places where one can go and discuss options, etc.

I wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide!

 

[Ria_Rose]

No matter what your family or boyfriend think it is your desision.

Some things to consider: How will you feel if you decide not to have the baby? How will having the baby effect your life? Can you still forfill your ambitions with a baby? If you did decide to have the baby adpoted can you see yourself not getting attached to it while it grows inside you? Will you wonder about where it is or what it is doing as it grows up? Is your relationship ready for the pressures of a baby? Do you feel attached to the baby already?

Also bear in mind that at 10 weeks, the fetus is 1 and half inchs big. Also the longer you leave it the harder the procedure may be on your body.

 

[Serene123]

I havn't read any posts apart from the first one because I've just got in from dinner and I'm feeling pretty lazy lol. Anyway, no one can tell you whether or not to have an abortion. It's your body. Your life won't be over, it'll just be more difficult (which will make it so much more worth it). Please don't get rid of it if that's not what you want to do. You'll regret it forever if it's not what you want. However, if it is what you want, don't let anyone put you off either. It's your body, your decision, and as against abortion as I am, it's completely your choice.

To decide whether you want the baby, forget about money, forget about responsibilities, forget about everyones opinions, and ask yourself "do I want this baby?" If you do, you know what to do. If you don't, again, you know what to do.

 

[Ratty]

My sister-in-law couldn't have kids and now has two beautiful adopted children. The oldest is five and runs around boasting that she is adopted.

It sounds like you have a really good support system around you between parents and your boyfriend which makes things a lot easier. But in the end, the decision is yours !! Whatever you decide you are the one who will live with the decision.

Good luck with whatever your choose!

 

[Blob]

Hey i just wanted to say good luck with your choice. I went through the thought of giving up my baby though it didnt last long i also thought about what i wanted to do in my life. I'm in a law degree and i've still got 5 more years at uni, i'm fairly ok at my sport and was meant to be training with the british U21s this year, though because its horses i cant get on one at all until November and i'm totally gutted. But now i cant imagine that i'd be so petty (though i do really miss it) i know its not the same as what you're going through and i cant imagine the decision you're having to make. But i dont have any qualms about abortion because i think that people make the decision that is right for them. So good luck and i hope you make the right one for you.