LDC
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LDC,
Thank you so much for your reply to my post this morning. Hearing someone tell me I can make it through this funeral means a lot right now.
Our OB said we could have intercourse as soon as the bleeding stopped (didn't put an exact date on it). We started being intimate (without vaginal sex) within a couple of days after birth. I know, it sounds crazy, but I was feeling so, so alone and even just kissing, etc. was so comforting to me (and DH). I really don't think it's irresponsible to be (at least mildly) intimate at the moment!
Just a thought on that comment ;-). So, you are waiting on the autopsy results before organizing a funeral? That must be so hard, just to be in limbo like that. Gardening sounds like a great activity though! At least it gets you outside a bit. I have mostly been in our bedroom or cleaning the house. I should get out too...
Hugs, Cee
It definitely doesn't sound crazy, I found it comforting last night to be close with oh and just be "normal" although it did also make me strangely emotional too. I'm going to wait until the bleeding stops to have full sex, no one mentioned this to me so thank you for sharing what you were told, it really helps. The bleeding seems to have slowed down a little now, I'm hoping by the end of the week it will have stopped.
It's a week today since I went into hospital to deliver - I can't understand where the time has gone, yet the memory is like I could be delivering again right this second if I close my eyes.
I saw a family member this morning with their newborn. Gah it broke my heart.
Xx
Hey LDC,
Wondering how you're doing these days? DH and I decided to get away for a week after the funeral last Friday; it has helped not to be in the same bedroom where I was so sick the weeks before delivering...
I feel the same way about time. It is so strange to think that I lost the twins on 7/7 and it is already 7/24. It makes me so sad, actually, to see the time slipping by. A girlfriend of mine was about 1 month behind me in her pregnancy. She must be catching up to me now. Except I'm actually behind her... Is it awful to be strangely jealous of pregnant women and women with babies? I too went into the hospital to get my pathology records and there were women leaving with newborns EVERYWHERE! I didn't know what to do with myself...
How are you making it through now?
Hi Cee,
I'm glad you managed to get away for a week, it's nice to get away from everything and try and concentrate on being together and try and gain some happiness.
I'm ok, ish. Up I went to see my dr this morning as I'm due back at work on Monday and honestly can't face it. We're still waiting to hear back from the chaplain about a funeral, I think he will call next week as it's been two weeks Sunday since I delivered Reuben. I couldn't face going into work knowing I'm just waiting for that call, the Dr was really nice and signed me off for a while longer which I'm grateful for.
I am exactly the same about the jealousy of other pregnant people / newborns, I'm am 100% the same. We went shopping to get Reuben a blanket for him to be buried with and all around were baby clothes - it broke my heart to think that this should be a happy time and not the sad event that it is. Life is cruel, beyond cruel.
Xxxx