I lied :S

[SleepyBaby]

So i went to the doctors today and told her i was pregnant, while she was taking my bp i asked her, due to previous miscarriage would it be possiable to get an early scan as every time i pee im holding my breath, she said no, only 1 miscarriage doesn't increase the chances of another one, esp as i had a healthy baby before, then she asked me my LMP..

so i lied.. i put it a month back which would equal my 12 week scan really being at about 8/9 weeks.. should i have done this, i feel really bad as lying doesn't come easy to me, i cant keep story stright, tho i didnt fully lie, i kinda told her half truths, my lmp was early and short and light, but anyway now i feel really bad about lying, but then im thinking its ok because i really want it to put my mind at ease about bean

reading this back, OMG am i over thinking things atm lol

if you where me and felt you needed an early scan for the sake of your sanity would you have kinda spoofed? fibbed? its not really a bad one! 8 weeks should be far enough to be able to see babys heartbeat? so it will be reassuring, wont it?

omg i need help lol

 

[bitethebullet]

I can kind of understand why you did it and to be honest I think it's a shame that ladies can't have a reassurance scan when they've had a previous MC. I'm quite lucky in that I live in a town (UK) which has an early pregnancy assessment clinic. I went to doc to talk about a non pregnancy related matter and just happened to mention cramping and brown spotting right at the end of my app (I wasn't particularly worried as I thought it was normal) and my doc got me booked in for an early scan for a couple of days later. I saw the heartbeat (at 6+3) and yes was reassured (although I wasn't really all that worried until I saw my doc's reaction!!).

 

[Ethereal]

I had 3 previous miscarriages and I still wasn't offered any scans, they wouldn't even do a beta HCG for me. So I can totally understand why you lied sweetie. Stop being so hard on yourself. It's natural to worry about yourself and your baby. Best of luck to you

 

[BoBo14]

Don't feel too bad but will you not worry after this scan as 12 weeks is point when risk of miscarriage falls? I am in similar circumstance with one previous miscarriage and one healthy pregnancy. I paid for a private 7 week scan so I get a 12 week one too. I'm not going to tell mw I had private one

 

[mwah_xx]

I don;t know if I would have done the same - not saying that its wrong, but because I want the nt scan and I know that there is a finite time that this can be done, so I didn't want a scan so early, then not be able to have another arranged.

Saying that though I was really lucky, I mentioned to my MW at my booking in that because I was on the pill before my bfp my LMP was actually May 2011.....though we had a rough idea of dates she sent me up to be assessed so I definitely wouldn't miss the nt scan! Then I also got very excited and paid for a private scan as well.

I think if I was you my worry would be missing the nt testing (if you are having this) oh and the wait between that scan and the 20 week scan!

Good luck though xx

 

[EdnaLegume]

i'm a bit confused... you are really 5+4 weeks but you told them a date that would indicate you are really 8 or 9 weeks along?

while I totally get why you did it and I don't truly blame you, I think you did however, open yourself up to a big ole bowl of trouble because now they are going to think your baby is a month smaller and possibly consider you high risk since the baby isn't developing properly... they are likely going to invest more time and technology than necessary at a considerable cost to monitor your seemingly slow growing baby.

while I would never recommend doing so, one thing I've seen done is going to ER complaining of pain in the side and they will do an ultrasound there to rule out ectopic... just something I've heard of, not suggesting you do it. *wink wink*

 

[SleepyBaby]

thankies i think pregnancy hormones getting best of me today.

I live in belfast, close to 3 maternity hospitals so i cant understand why they wouldn't let me go for an early one anyway, when i did miscarry last time they told me NOT to go to the hospital at all, i rang and they told me unless the pain got really bad not to go up, the pain didnt get to bad and i miscarried in my own bathroom, after waiting all day to see what was going to happen, they wouldn't give me a scan even when i was bleeding and cramping, told me whatever was happening at that stage they couldn't help, when i went up the next day they scanned me and acted like they didnt believe i had been pregnant in 1st place, until i took a pregnancy test! they even put me in a waiting room with other mothers all waiting for there scans!

im angry at them all! they don't seem to care about feelings now a days, all about numbers and statics and as little paper work as possiable!

rant over!

now im just annoyed and have decided its right i have more of a say in how im treated this time!

 

[SleepyBaby]

hehe read the rest of the replies i got while righting the full wee rant essay lol

i did tell her i had a kinda AF at the end of Jan but it was shorted and lighter and a week before i was due to get AF so she passed it off, if at the scan they say i have slow growing baby i will tell them again that AF came end of jan but was just different than normal, which is true, i know it was real AF but if was a funny one.

im not going to waste anyones time, or ask for alot of attention, in fact as soon as i see baby heart beat im gonna be sure babys fine and carry on, its just the heartbeat i need to see to be sure, it was same with my 1st child, as soon as i seen his heartbeat there wasnt another worry in the pregnancy, i questioned nothing as i knew he'd be fine!

 

[bitethebullet]

I think it's really sad that ladies who are going through a mc are treated like this. I know it must be really common every day stuff for the health care professionals but you would think they would maintain a little bit of empathy for the woman. I think unfortunately some healthcare trusts are so overstretched that they cannot scan early or afford the time to reassure ladies- ok there might be nothing that can be done about an MC but there is certainly something that can be done to help alleviate the suffering of the woman going through the ordeal.

 

[SleepyBaby]

while I would never recommend doing so, one thing I've seen done is going to ER complaining of pain in the side and they will do an ultrasound there to rule out ectopic... just something I've heard of, not suggesting you do it. *wink wink*

Epic Comment is epic lmao lol lol

 

[leahtaba]

the only problem is, you will still worry after that scan, and now you might not get a 12 week one were they can tell you more/you can see more.

I paid for a seven week scan which put my mind at ease a bit, but i was still a nervous wreck after it as i was aware that an early scan doesn't mean things wont still go wrong.

 

[Pudden]

I dont think i would have lied - sorry.

I wanted an early scan for reassurance so i have paid private for one...

After having to attend A&E at the weekend for an injury, i saw a woman in there who thought she may have miscarried, and it was so hard for me to look at her knowing that hopefully my bean was safe and well.

I think early scans should go to people who are really in need of it, if they are bleeding etc.

Surely if people are asking for early scans when they dont need them, this means other people's normal scans (12wks etc) are put back due to increased workloads of the people doing the scans in NHS?

You are not going to see a heartbeat at 5 weeks so is it really going to reassure you that everything will be ok?

Sorry if this sounds wrong, but just my thoughts....

 

[Frooty]

I wouldn't lie to be honest cus they will find out when they scan u and would mess up ur other scans and may cause them to think something is wrong.

 

[Athomemum]

I totally agree with Pudden. i would never think that my peace of mind was more important than some ones elses. If I really needed to I would pay to go private.

Also I would NEVER suggest that their might be a problem with my pregnancy to get a scan. I think that's awful behaviour. Talk about tempting fate.

 

[wilbz]

I wouldn't worry your self, they will probably do your scan then give you another one in a few weeks, as for your due date it's your scan date they use not your last period. I didnt even remeber when my last period was when I visited the mw so I really wouldnt worry about it

 

[leahtaba]

just to add as well, we ALL want early scans, we are all nervous wrecks and we would all love to be able to be reassured everything is OK. unfortunately though we either have to wait it out or pay for a private scan (like I did). I do understand why you lied but I would maybe phone back and correct it you might only be stopping yourself getting a 12 weeks scan as I said before.

and to the person who suggested going in for a scan pretending you have pains, that is disgusting. not only is it tempting fate, If you have no reason to believe that something is wrong you shouldn't use up the services of women who are in actual pain, or bleeding.

 

[susan_1981]

My doctor was really nice actually. When I had my appointment with her just to get the pregnancy confirmed, I said that I was really paranoid because I'd had a miscarriage before and because it had taken 3 years to fall pregnant. She actually asked me if I would like an early reassurance scan, to which I said yes (but it was annoying because I'd already booked an early scan privately - but I thought 2 scans is better than none). My appointment never came through though and I didn't bother chasing because I'd had my private one.

So I don't blame you for lying, but I probably would have said that I wasn't sure when my last period was so they would book me in for a dating scan. Because obviously when you go for your 12 week scan (when you will be only 8 weeks), they are going to say that your baby is measuring way behind what you think which might make them think there could be a problem with baby. But obviously you will know so you can tell them that you had a funny period that last month or something like that x

 

[SleepyBaby]

Paying for an early scan is ok when you have the money to do so, I don't so that wasn't a route i could have went down.

You think early scans should go to people who are really in need of it, if they are bleeding etc

but not if they are worried about it 24/7 because of previous problems? Last time i was pregnant, i miscarried, alone, in my bathroom at 2.30am, everyone i know at that time was sleeping, knowing everything is alright will help me sleep at night and if not at least i can make sure i wouldn't be on my own.

Surely if people are asking for early scans when they dont need them, this means other people's normal scans (12wks etc) are put back due to increased workloads of the people doing the scans in NHS?

other people normal scans, i can assure you will not be delayed more than 10 mins, the paperwork that will be done, would need to have been done anyway so i don't see where the workload would be increased

You are not going to see a heartbeat at 5 weeks so is it really going to reassure you that everything will be ok?

at 5 weeks no, but im past 5 weeks already im 5+4 going by the kinda AF i had end of jan start of feb so prob bit more, at 8/9 weeks when i will get the appointment seeing babys heartbeat will reassure me alot.

thought id answer this reply as it seemed kinda judgey to me, i may be being over sensitive but .. yeah

Im being selfish? how? how am i putting myself infront of other people? because i cannot afford the money to go privet? Only people with money to burn should be reassured?

 

[SleepyBaby]

i did tell the doctor i had an AF after the one she wrote down, i told her it was alot different and earlier than my usual AF's, which it was, she ignored it and kept the earlier LMP date, i didnt push it that id had an AF after it.

When i go for the scan i will be telling them in the scan room before the scan the same thing i told my doctor, i had a weird AF end of jan. the thing i lied about was how heavy that AF was, i told the doctor it was light, truth was it only lasted 2 days but was nearly as heavy as a normal af for the two days

 

[forestfire]

If I'm honest I wouldn't have lied, I totally understand your worries as I had a private early scan at 9 weeks, but now you won't be able to have your 12 week scan now with your screenings etc because I think if you have an early scan they then make you wait until the anomoly scan at 20 weeks. (I don't know this as fact just what I've heard). I'm not judging you or saying you are wrong, but I think I'd rather see the baby at 12 weeks than 8 or 9 as there is so much more to see. xx