I realised it's not lack of confidence..

[nightkd]

I've recently realised that it's not confidence I lack. It's knowing what to say. Like if I'm in a situation where I KNOW what I need the outcome to be and KNOW exactly what I need to convey I'm absolutely fine. I can talk to strangers etc. It's just I'm sh*t scared of getting into conversations because I always end up really embarassed because I've got like....a mental block of what to reply with.

It makes me soooo frustrated and it makes me avoid situations where I DO need to talk to people, or MIGHT end up in a conversation.

Yeah, I do lack self esteem from certains occurences in my younger years and teens. That's improving. I still don't feel comfortable exercising in front of people incase I look unfit/stupid/ugly - that sort of thing. But my main barrier is this inability to think of things to say.

I love performing, singing etc on stage (though do get in a panic) it gives me a massive boost of confidence! Conversations though, another story altogether.

I don't know what to do. I mean...what CAN I do?

It's making my life really dull and causing me to miss out on things I really want to do, so I regret things. I LOVE talking to people, but I just....can't.

 

[Dream.A.Dream]

I'm kind of the same, i have a phobia of making phone calls and have to rehearse what i wanted to say. All i can say is try to tackle it head on. That's what i did and i'm getting better xx

 

[Alexas Mommy]

 

[Tegans Mama]

I know how you feel hun, I am exactly the same and there is absolutely nothing I can think of to do about it!! If you think of something let me know!

 

[jillypoop]

I'm kind of the same, i have a phobia of making phone calls and have to rehearse what i wanted to say. All i can say is try to tackle it head on. That's what i did and i'm getting better xx

I thought it was just me that suffered with that!!! I hate making phone calls, I am a sissy, I would rather email or anything, i just hate using the phone, but as soon as I am on the phone talking, it doesnt bother me!! I think it might just be cos i'm weird!!

xxx

 

[tone]

Im exactly the same hun. But i also have a speech block where i physically cant say a word. Its so embarassing! I can talk fluently if im talking to my baby or a dog or whatever but when it comes to conversations with people its awful! xxxx

 

[Mrs Doddy]

Hi Girls

I know exactly how you feel. I have a job where I need to know the law and I get really worried about speaking to people as you have to speak to them, I get panicky about being shouted at - I have got confidence issues which started when I was little due to my Dad.

I get stressed really easily and everything just goes round in circles. I have tried rescue remendies, herb stuff and none of it works.

I have just had Hypnosis (Monday night) and I can see a change in myself already - its worth thinking about.

 

[nightkd]

Wow, I'm so glad it's not just me! I just feel so helpless.. I really want to be able to converse with people, but I find myself shying away from conversations, or stopping myself from saying something incase it sounds stupid.

I've thought about hypnotherapy, was going to get a CD off of a website I found, but didn't quite know which one to get, none seemed specific enough for my issue..

I think mine might stem from my mum bullying me all through my teenage years, probably before, but I don't remember so well... I've always had pretty lousy confidence, but it seems specifically to be this one thing! If I'm in a situation I'm comfortable in, with people who know me for who I am, I'm absolutely fine. Loud, bossy and just generally more outgoing.... I just can't think of things when it's people I don't know, incase I look like an idiot.

xxx

 

[nightkd]

I'm kind of the same, i have a phobia of making phone calls and have to rehearse what i wanted to say. All i can say is try to tackle it head on. That's what i did and i'm getting better xx

I rehearse over and over again and even ask my mum if it sounds alright etc. =/ Once I've made a call (as long as it goes right) I'm absolutely fine...still nervous, but feel much better about making more calls.

xx

 

[Mrs Doddy]

Wow, I'm so glad it's not just me! I just feel so helpless.. I really want to be able to converse with people, but I find myself shying away from conversations, or stopping myself from saying something incase it sounds stupid.

I've thought about hypnotherapy, was going to get a CD off of a website I found, but didn't quite know which one to get, none seemed specific enough for my issue..

I think mine might stem from my mum bullying me all through my teenage years, probably before, but I don't remember so well... I've always had pretty lousy confidence, but it seems specifically to be this one thing! If I'm in a situation I'm comfortable in, with people who know me for who I am, I'm absolutely fine. Loud, bossy and just generally more outgoing.... I just can't think of things when it's people I don't know, incase I look like an idiot.

xxx

I know exactly how you feel - down to the parent thing

 

[saraian24]

Im exactly the same girls and im fine talking to hubby, kids family but when it comes to getting to know someone new im terrible! Iwish there was a book or somthing i could read to help me out, i swear its why i am a billy no mates!

 

[Mrs_Nesbit]

I can relate. I'm also aware that my inability to idilly chit chat with strangers makes me look stand offish & just knowing that only serves to make my head go blank all the more.
Cant understand it, I'm not shy in the least!