I think we need a bad day sticky thread

[Sus09]

Dmom is right cake is the answer!! not just to Brithdays though, to life!!
Thanks for all the sweet messages ladies. I´m fine just really busy.
Sus It is never easy, but at least we are still in the running!

Welcome back Nats

 

[Sus09]

Hi ladies!

First of all I have to thank Dmom for hilighting this thread.

I had a terrible week, I got really upset. Lot of things have upset me, a big one bein my job, but TTC also played a big part in it all.

It was my fertile week this week, I had lots of EWCM this cycle. I have not had it for few cycles, also a nice positive OPK, (btw I found out now that my surge lasts 12 hours) and there is me all happy thinking this cycle we have a good chance!

Me and my OH get all ready to BD... and then he has performance issues, night after night. He could start but would lose his performance half way through not managing to succeed not even once. So we totally missed our cycle

The worse thing is I get all upset because it is not easy for me to get pergnant, because he made me wait a year before trying and now he could not perform, missing my opportunity. And he gets all upset because he is letting me down, cos he feels selfish for making me wait, guilty cos he can´t perform, creating a vicious circle where we both get upset.

He has been extremely affectionate with me, I am getting spoilt now, and last night we managed to BD and perform after the poor guy tried several times. We probably missed the egg, but also with the stress we both had no chance to catch it!!

Anyway, he now has agreed to take suplements, I read here Maca helps? where can I get good quality Maca in the UK?

I feel so shitty, useless and frustrated. I read I am not alone here, and I do feel for you ladies who have missed their cycles due to similar reasons so to you all.

Ahh Sus, now I know why the sad face and can completely understand .....I'm so sorry you're both having absolutely shitty time of it, I know so well how you feel 'another wasted cycle'. Mine doesn't get performance issues, he just doesn't perform, full stop not even when I really need him too, but hey enough of me and my DH issues, I've bored everyone to tears with it all now.....

It's really positive though that although your DH is having problems he recognises this and wants to do everything to help, at least you are both working in the right direction and I'm sure that means you will have your little soon, hey these things are sent to try us aren't they? The pressure is just huge for both of you and more so because we feel our time's running out, if only they'd listened to us in the beginning that these things take time - men!!!!

Big hugs to you lovely, I'm thinking about you today, you're not alone at all

Thanks Jax, and all of you ladies! I feel a bit better now, I really appreciate all your words and support

 

[keekeesaurus]

Welcome back Nats! I thought you had run away with your horsey .

Just wanted to say thank you to all you ladies who've posted openly and honestly about your OHs in relation to TTC . It really helps to realise you're not the only ones with 'problems' in that area. My OH doesn't have performance problems, but like Jax's he just can't be arsed sometimes. Very frustrating. But he does get all frisky when it's AF...probably because he knows I won't put out then . Naughty boy. He also smokes (cigs and pot), won't take pills or go to the doctor and is addicted to bloody Football Manager. Some days he forgets to eat until I get in. But I love him to pieces and wouldn't be with anyone else...I have just learned to bite my tongue sometimes . Anyway, we've had 'the talk' and we're on an even keel now and it's a massive relief TBH...he might even do an SA if he has to *faints*.

Oh, and happy birthday Butterfly! I hope you had a lovely day

 

[OvenBunWanted]

But he does get all frisky when it's AF...probably because he knows I won't put out then

Mine does the exact same thing!!! What is up with that?? Three weeks out of the month he couldn't be bothered...but the second AF comes, he gets like a dog in heat

 

[NorthStar]

Mine works away half the time (2 weeks in 4) so I think that helps keep things fresh from a bonking point of view I also travel a bit with work too so we can't always spend that 2 weeks together.

Causes massive amounts of stress on the TTC front though really it just sucks I might not stress as much if I was younger but this next cycle he is only home 1 week out of 4 so we're officially on a TTC break.

Keekee I'm glad you've managed to give your partner The Talk

 

[polaris]

I have problems with OH every month too. I find that we can only really have sex every three days otherwise he is not able to finish. It really stresses me out because I never know whether it's better to try for every second day or to just accept that it is not going to happen. I always worry that he have missed our chance.

 

[Natsby]

Someone on another thread, (sorry I can´t remember who) was saying they wanted sperm in the freezer to use when you needed it. God wouldn´t that be nice. I do want my OH´s baby and no one elses, but I wish I could get it with out the stress and keep sex for fun.

 

[polaris]

Someone on another thread, (sorry I can´t remember who) was saying they wanted sperm in the freezer to use when you needed it. God wouldn´t that be nice. I do want my OH´s baby and no one elses, but I wish I could get it with out the stress and keep sex for fun.

Yeah that would be an ideal solution wouldn't it? It would take so much of the pressure off. It makes me feel so hopeless when I look at some people's BD schedules, every day and twice a day, and they still don't always get pregnant, really makes me feel what chance have we got. I know it only takes once and getting the timing right is the most important thing really but I have to keep telling myself.

 

[Natsby]

Several people on here have got their BFP the month they had less sex not more. I think quality and timing beats quantity. Here´s hoping, I really don´t want to do it everyday, the romance is already suffering, I don´t want to make it a complete chore!

 

[readyformore]

Someone on another thread, (sorry I can´t remember who) was saying they wanted sperm in the freezer to use when you needed it. God wouldn´t that be nice. I do want my OH´s baby and no one elses, but I wish I could get it with out the stress and keep sex for fun.

That was me!

At the time, I was thinking the sperm would solve all of my issues.
If I could collect sperm from DH for the entire duration of the month, store it in my fridge, and use it when I'm ovulating..........
There would be like a billion sperm in there. It would have to work......right?

 

[Sus09]

Sex for fun! I have forgotten what that is since TTC

Yeah, what's up with blokes? Mine also gets frisky as soon as AF arrives.
I think it has been positive to share our experiences as last week i was sad and worried that my OH didnt have enough interest in me, and now I realise that the performance issues or lack of interest in sex is normal in some men.

Polaris, mine cant perform more often than every 3 days, otherwhise he cant finish either. Oh well i am sure we will get there.

Frozen sperm! If we could only freeze our OH sperm and use it when convenient for us! How fab would that be!

 

[Desperado167]

Sus ,

 

[Sus09]

Thanks Despie

 

[readyformore]

I have to admit, that I didn't realize that so many men had these issues.


My closest friend's husband has a very difficult time. When she first told me about it, I was shocked. I guess I'm pretty sheltered, b/c I didn't even know that it could happen.
Anyway, I told her that perhaps he wasn't ready for a baby.
I realize now, going through it myself a few months ago, that it really doesn't have much to do with babies at all!

It took her an entire year to convince him to have sex with her while she was ovulating, (I'm not sure why in the world she didn't just lie to him about the timing....seriously) but when it finally worked out, she got pregnant the first try, with twins! Oh, and repeat the scenario for pregnancy #2. Twins again, lol.

She always said that she and I both had issues getting pregnant; they are just very, very, different issues, lol.

 

[Natsby]

Sad to resurrect this thread, but I think I need it today. I am feeling like the black dog is with me today, (depressed.) We just found out my cousin has breast cancer, she is lucky they caught it early because she went to get a cyst seen and they thought they would check the other side as well and found three small malignancies. Now she has had a biopsy on her lymp glands to see if it has spread and then the will do a masectomy. Poor woman I feel so bad for her.
Plus oH and I aren´t speaking since a fight yesterday and the man who owns the horse is threatening to have him sent to the circus for lion food. Feel a bit hopeless today. Sorry to bring my worries on here, but at least with the title of the thread you are forewarned! Off to teach 4 1/2 back to back...that maybe kill or cure me!

 

[NorthStar]

Nats that is indeed a shitty day.

Two of my friends have had breast cancer in their thirities, both have went on to make a full recovery, run 10km fundraisers and all that kind of thing, so there is a lot of hope yet for your cousin, though it must be a horrible shock.

 

[Jax41]

Oh no Nats, that's horrible I'm sorry you've had such sad news today....but I agree with Northstar, I have a really close girlfriend who, bless her, has had it twice now and has come out the other side and in really good health.

Horrible shock for you cuz, your family and you but good that they have caught it early and can help xXx

 

[MommyToBeIsMe]

Nats That really is a horrible day.

 

[Viking15]

Natsby.
All of these things are out of your control and that feels awful! I feel so horrible about the horse. And the breast cancer is just awful. I hope she is going to be okay since they caught it early. What a truly horrid day!

 

[Wendyk07]

Sad to resurrect this thread, but I think I need it today. I am feeling like the black dog is with me today, (depressed.) We just found out my cousin has breast cancer, she is lucky they caught it early because she went to get a cyst seen and they thought they would check the other side as well and found three small malignancies. Now she has had a biopsy on her lymp glands to see if it has spread and then the will do a masectomy. Poor woman I feel so bad for her.
Plus oH and I aren´t speaking since a fight yesterday and the man who owns the horse is threatening to have him sent to the circus for lion food. Feel a bit hopeless today. Sorry to bring my worries on here, but at least with the title of the thread you are forewarned! Off to teach 4 1/2 back to back...that maybe kill or cure me!