I'm atruggling

[Solitaire]

I'm struggling,

My son hasn't shown much interest this week in the food I've given him, and when he has he just constantly gagging.

Today at dinner, we gave him some good to try again and he held it and took it to his mouth and then he started gagging/ choking. It was awful to see and then he was vomiting.
My husband just keeps panicking and now wants everything puréed, but I don't know what to do.
It's scary to see, I'm scared of him choking.

 

[laodicean]

I've just replied to your other thread... first off it's scary when they do this but it's also completely normal.

It's normal to panic, but baby has to learn how to deal with food in his mouth somehow; I started my LO off with purrees in the very beginning, which he got used to so quickly but he's gag on anything with even a hint of texture or that was thicker than he was used to. Purrees is such a slow way of getting there; BLW allows them to do it at their own pace and play with the food, and discover what happens when they chew. Part of learning is making mistakes, and your LO tonight learned not to take massive bites of food and try to swallow it without chewing. Don't take away the chance from him to learn from this mistake!

Like I said in the other thread, it really is worth getting the book to read and going to the forum to talk to other parents who are trying it - if only for the reassurance that you're doing fine. Which you are!

 

[Solitaire]

Thanks for replying.
I've got the book and had a good read through it, I'm just scared.
My husband just keeps panicking and then I worry that maybe I'm not doing the right thing.

I'm going to keep at it, going to try some sweet potatoe fingers later on.

I think I just expected him to eat straight away ha

 

[laodicean]

Unless your husband has read all the baby weaning books, his opinion doesn't count. If he has, and he wants to do purrees, then it's on him and he can plan it all out, buy and cook all the food, and then portion it up for you to give to LO.

Sorry, I've got the hump at the moment against OHs being unsupportive or unhelpful when it comes to parenting - OH last night just walked away from J and left him sobbing in his cot saying "well you're just going to have to get used to it". It was only his first night in the damn thing! I told him that until he's read up on all the various methods of putting baby to sleep, then he can jog on with his immediate leap to CIO.

My OH was a nightmare when we were doing purrees - refused to feed them to LO because "he clearly didn't want it." Really? Have you tried to give it to him with a smile on your face. Men! He of course loves BLW because a) he gets to show off to all his friends about his son gnawing away on a lump of ham b ) he's a lazy git

 

[Solitaire]

Haha no he hasn't! Your totally right!

Just tried him on sweet potatoe fingers, he squashed them up.
I put one to his mouth. He tock some of it, messed with it in His mouth and then gagged and then vomited.

 

[laodicean]

Haha! That sounds very familiar. We were out with friends this weekend, and spurred on by watching my LO gnaw his way through a load of chips, they gave their little girl one. She loved it! Then she coughed. Then she coughed again. And then there was a tsunami of green vomit courtesy of the cheddar and broccoli purree they'd overfed her!

It smelled, in a word, grim.

My LO was okay on chips to begin with, but they would set him off coughing/gagging really easily. He never vommed, but probably more by luck than judgement. Try harder foods like breadsticks and pita bread - you can smear dips on them, they hold their shape well, and they tend to disintegrate more gradually than chips so it gives them a chance to either spit it out or chew it for a while.

I've got to say, I've been doing BLW since J was about 5 and a bit months, and it's only in the past fortnight that he's got the hang of swallowing food. Up until that point, he'd chew then spit it out. The fact your LO is trying to swallow is really good - he's worked out what food is for! He just needs to get the hang of how to go about it.

 

[Solitaire]

Will pitta bread and bread sticks not be too hard? Or more of a choke hazard?

Do you think he is trying to swallow?

 

[laodicean]

Not at all - in fact, I started J on breadsticks as his first food that he was in control of eating - they start off hard but get really mushy as the saliva soaks in. He loved pitta and hummus, and I gave him those in the first week too - wholemeal. But for both of them, he's only actually started eating them relatively recently. They taught him how to chew and what happens to food when you chew it.

Meat is another brilliant one to give - Jake loves all kinds of meat. His first week we gave him steak, and he gummed at it all through dinner. None of it went down, but it got chewed really well.

The secret to BLW really is to give them what you've got on your plate. We've modified our diet a bit to take account of this, but a typical meal will have carbs, protein and veggies. He either gets some off my plate or I pre-cut his veg/meat so that it's big enough for him to hold. Roasted veggies with sausages works really well - and I slice the sausages in half length ways (I use chipolatas so they're not too big for his mouth) so that he can get a taste of the meat instead of chewing on skin.

I don't know that your LO is definitely trying to swallow. Baby's gag reflexes are further forward on the tongue than adults are, and so it might be that he's just got too much in his mouth at a time and is triggering the gag reflex.

I know it's hard but try not to feed him - let him feed himself. I will sometimes hand J a piece of food, but for the most part I just put it out on the tray in front of him and let him choose what he wants to eat. Invariably, he'll pick up the meat first now!

 

[Solitaire]

Thank you do much for your advice, you've been a great help

 

[maggie111]

How is he sitting? Had our LO on our lap and he gagged a lot - he's fine in the high chair