Inlaws want me to be induced so they can be here for the birth

[luz]

So last week my FIL said he was planning a cruise with MIL and they were looking at going the week I am due. .... He asked if I would ask my dr to be induced a week early so that they would be here when lo is born.

I'm not too fond of the idea of induction, and would much rather go into labor on my own. Not to mention the timing is horrible! One week early puts me getting induced on my sons birthday, which is the Monday before thanksgiving! My family always has a huge party and I really don't want to miss it, or take a newborn.

I know it is my decision and I can tell them no, but my husband is also giving me pressure because he thinks I should just do it for their sake.

Am I wrong for feeling like telling them off? I would have no problem if she happened to come early on her own, but come on! Scheduling my child's birth so YOU can go on vacation? Seems ridiculous to me. Not to mention they've already been on 6 cruises in the last year.

 

[Radiance]

Don't get induced because your inlaws want to be there get induced because you need to. You clearly don't feel great about it so I think you should just tell them you don't want. I must agree with you, that seems ridiculous and slightly selfish to me. Plus, a week before thanksgiving and on your sons birthday, definitely seems very stressful!!

 

[Larkspur]

That is seriously one of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard. I would just say no chance in hell, and not another word to be said about it.

Induction is not a damn walk in the park, it increases your chances of intervention/drugs/complications significantly. It's not something you do because a relative wants to take a cruise! I don't know what doctors are like where you are, but if you asked a doctor here for an induction because your due date might interfere with a relative's potential holiday plans, they would laugh you out of the room.

 

[babydevil1989]

I dont even think you would have a choice! No dr would induce you for that reason! X

 

[SurpriseMom2B]

Wow, that just seems insane! I'd tell them (probably not in the nicest words either) that if they want to be here for the birth they better keep their schedule open because you aren't inducing. And also, would your doctor even agree to this?? I'm in Canada and I know induction would only be offered for a medical reason or if you are already over due....

 

[Pretty Please]

Your baby - your birth equals you do what YOU want to do no one else. Only a doc should able to change your mind for the health of the baby ! Unless u are going private ? I'm surprised you could be able to decide your induction date can't on standard nhs.

Be strong - sounds like unless u put your foot down now she might be a nightmare in yrs to come .....

Gl x

 

[LisaDanielle]

Ditto what Larkspur said regarding interventions.

That is just ridiculous. No, you are NOT wrong. You are 100% right! It is much SAFER for you and your baby to go into labour naturally unless there is a medical reason for induction.
Your in-laws sound incredibly selfish. I would have a hard time not going off on them, and on your husband, to be honest. Have him read some articles about induction, perhaps?

 

[melfy77]

My advice: don't get induced!! i had to be induced with DD because my water broke but labor wouldn't start, and it was PAINFUL!!! No idea how painful natural labor is, but I hope I won't have to be induced with this one. And you never know, your baby might very be born a little early. DD was born 10 days early and timing was great!

 

[GrowingMum]

I would absolutely not! That is an absurd request of them. They must not realize the reality of being induced or I don't think they'd ask. Besides labor being more difficult and painful and increasing your chances of intervention, including csection, it is not good for the baby either. Eventhough 39 weeks is considered full term, if you don't go in to labor early naturally then baby is not ready. He/she still has developing to do inside. Baby will come when baby is ready,with the timing that is healthiest for baby, unless your doctor finds a medical reason otherwise.

I would not even consider a request like that for a second. I'd look at them like like they were crazy for even asking. It might be helpful to provide them with some material to read as to why early induction with no medical reason is such a bad idea.

 

[Louppey]

WTF

I mean, seriously WTF?! A baby will come when it's ready, not when your IL's deem it's arrival. Tell them your Doctor has advised against it, tbh I think they all would any.

I'm sorry but I can't actually get over their attitude on this. Why did they book the cruise then? Or why not change their plans!!!!

 

[chulie]

I almost feel like I don't need I reply because everyone has sorta said what I'm thinking but I just had to add.....seriously. I would tell them all to go fly a kite...could you even imagine if for some reason..even by a week or two your babies lungs weren't fully developed and needed NICU help just because the inlaws want to vacation????? Or if the induction went poorly and you needed a c section??? I mean...crazy doesn't even begin to describe it!!!!

I'm also in Canada and ya, unless there was a medical reason I cannot even imagine a dr "ok"ing that????

 

[luz]

My inlaws are extremely rich and very selfish. They think the world revolves around them and everything should go their way. Since its my second baby, I could be induced at 39 weeks if I wanted to- regardless of the reason. My FIL is an anesthesiologist so it's not like he's a stranger to l&d. I will not do it, but I'm just really being bothered by the pressure from everyone to do it. My husband, bless his heart, loves his mother even though she is bat crazy. He can't seem to see it and I worry its because he's the exact same! Talking to them really isn't an option because well.... I don't. If I talked to them I'm sure if start screaming 5 years of pent up frustrations.

Thanks for helping me to know I'm not crazy and that letting nature take its course really is the best option. My son was born early so I think this one might be as well, I just HATE the thought of induction!

 

[tommyg]

WTF??? I'll echo what everybody else has already said.

Seriously one of the most stupid things I have heard of. If they really want to be there then they can alter their holiday why the heck should your risk your health and your baby's for them.

They are clearly not the least bit interested in you, your health or well being. To them you are only a cargo carrier for their grandchild. A bit like me to my IL's.

If I were you I'd be on my knees praying baby arrives as soon as they step on the blinking boat.

And if FIL says any more about it you are going to report him for breaching professional ethics.
I haven't a clue if it is no isn't but I can't imagine pressuring somebody into a medical proceedure for your own benefit is ethically acceptable to the medical profession.

 

[tommyg]

OMG I'm trying to think how you put this to OH who can't see the diffrence.

Option A - You go for a poo as and when you are ready, it comes out, some times a little squeezing and pushing is necessary.

Option B - Your not ready for a poo but somebody is going to make you have a poo. Fill you with drugs, poke around in your butt hole, give you more drugs and prod around until a poo comes out. And if it really comes to it we'll cut you open to get that poo out.

Which would he (and FIL) prefer?

 

[TicToc]

Everyone already said it... they are NUTS!

But the poo analogy is great!

 

[JessPape]

Tell ur inlaws no, induction can be bad for the baby, bad for you, and can lead to C-sections. Its an irresponsible choice to make just for them to 'be' there.

 

[Loobylola]

As a joke?! How utterly ridiculous, no youre not wrong!!

How selfish. Tell them to piss off.

 

[Mrs Doddy]

Omg are they for real ? Hell no !!!

I have no words !

 

[chulie]

Omg that poo analogy is the best thing I've ever heard!!!!!

 

[Andypanda6570]

I can't even believe someone would have the nerve to even think that let alone to ask that