Interesting Psychology Article on CIO

[Ozzieshunni]

Thought this was interesting and wanted to share.

To clarify, I never said it was a study. I said it was an article. I don't see what the issue is

 

[Gen79]

Seriously? We can't have a discussion about something unless the OP specifically calls for one? In the News and Debates forum? Oi.

 

[Ozzieshunni]

No, you're not allowed to because I didn't say so! You didn't know that?

 

[nosocks]

 

[feedindy]

Recently I have read a completely unbiased article on CIO and it was interesting as well, so after reading this one, I feel like the author has a biased point of view on CIO after reading the last part where she wrote about her upbringing.

I would like to share my own point of view about CIO, since we are in the News & Debates forum after all.

The following is my personal opinion...
Well I do think CIO is a parenting style that is fine to use in certain situations. I have used it a few times (maybe 6 or 7 times), and I would use it again. I would personally never use it as a method for me to get more sleep, or to teach a baby to STTN. I could care less how little sleep I get or how many times I have to wake up for her at night. I think that is a bit selfish to use CIO. My opinion is that the only time I use it is if my LO is completely overstimulated and overtired, and I know that me holding her will only keep her awake and miserable. I know from personal experience that when I try to rock her to sleep when she is in that state, will keep her awake for hours. When I was in that situation and I know I needed to put her down in her crib to settle and leave the room, I came back and checked her every 10 min to see if she has a wet diaper and see that she is ok. I peek at her from the door and it is hard to hear her cry. I have a feeling CIO wouldn't work for everyone's child, as maybe some babies would not respond to this method.

I think a big misconception is that the CIO moms who are using it for the right reasons just don't care when their baby cries. Trust me, I cry too when I hear my LO cry and I love her and do what's best for her. I truly believe CIO moms get a bad name because we hear horrid stories about people who use it for the wrong reasons. I am happy with my parenting choices and confident that I am a good mother to my LO.

So I guess I would call myself a Pro-CIO person, when done correctly and for the right reasons.

Thanks for sharing the article. I will always enjoy seeing things from another's point of view.

 

[Lightworker]

are you actually in Nairobi?

 

[smelly07]

I think also though it depends on the situation and reason behind doing it,

for example

my eldest daughter would only fall asleep being rocked to begin with which then moved to me sitting near her cot to laying with her on her bed until she fell asleep.......to some parents they would rather use the cc or cio method but to me my daughter needed me there and it made her happy and it made me happy so therefore its something i did until she was happy to go to bed by herself

my youngest daughter didnt want to be held or rocked or sat with she just wanted to be left alone.....sometimes she would cry due to over tiredness but i knew she would fall asleep soon and it wasnt because she wanted me......if i did go into her to console her then i would make it worse by doing so.

crying does not harm a child depending on the reason behind the crying.

if that makes sense..

 

[Lightworker]

Personally, I struggle to reconcile myself with the idea that some babies need to be left alone to sleep. Not saying that it doesn't happen..just that I've always believed babies prefer to be nursed/rocked/held to sleep.

My own LO is nursed to sleep (or rocked if I am not there). Very rarely does she pull away from the breast, turn away and sleep. Even when she does, she will be somewhat asleep, and not crying.

I find it hard to believe that a baby would prefer to cry to sleep. I know my view is narrow here, and this is not to say that I know every baby etc..its just my own difficulty with this CC/CIO thing.

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Sometimes, Alex needs a moment to wiggle and fuss a bit and then he'll happily be rocked to sleep. I know that babies can get over stimulated sometimes, but I cannot imagine leaving him alone in a room to cry.

 

[smelly07]

Personally, I struggle to reconcile myself with the idea that some babies need to be left alone to sleep. Not saying that it doesn't happen..just that I've always believed babies prefer to be nursed/rocked/held to sleep.

My own LO is nursed to sleep (or rocked if I am not there). Very rarely does she pull away from the breast, turn away and sleep. Even when she does, she will be somewhat asleep, and not crying.

I find it hard to believe that a baby would prefer to cry to sleep. I know my view is narrow here, and this is not to say that I know every baby etc..its just my own difficulty with this CC/CIO thing.

i can safely say that they dont!

the majority of babies i have looked after in my career self settled even if that did involve a few mins crying due to over tiredness/stimulation.

however its the babies that DO want it and DONT get it that doesnt sit comfortably with me, i couldnt personally do that. x

 

[Natsku]

I know at one point Maria did not want to be in my arms to fall asleep, she would scream and fight me to get out (she was like that for maybe a month or so) and now strangely enough, she will only nurse to sleep. But when I was trying to rock her to sleep during that earlier time it was more harmful to her, I think, than putting her down in the cot although she was crying.

 

[Lightworker]

Personally, I struggle to reconcile myself with the idea that some babies need to be left alone to sleep. Not saying that it doesn't happen..just that I've always believed babies prefer to be nursed/rocked/held to sleep.

My own LO is nursed to sleep (or rocked if I am not there). Very rarely does she pull away from the breast, turn away and sleep. Even when she does, she will be somewhat asleep, and not crying.

I find it hard to believe that a baby would prefer to cry to sleep. I know my view is narrow here, and this is not to say that I know every baby etc..its just my own difficulty with this CC/CIO thing.

i can safely say that they dont!

the majority of babies i have looked after in my career self settled even if that did involve a few mins crying due to over tiredness/stimulation.

however its the babies that DO want it and DONT get it that doesnt sit comfortably with me, i couldnt personally do that. x

I thought self-settling meant being able to go to sleep without the need for rocking etc but also without crying? Because crying denotes a need?

Also, did you look after these children straight from birth? What approach did their parents have from birth?

 

[kerrie24]

Interesting article.
I just think its unnatural to ignore a baby/childs cries,I couldnt do it,even when I might be at the end of my tether it would be too distressing to just leave them.I cant even do it with my 19 month old.
At least if you are trying to comfort the baby and they still cry,at least you tried Iykwim?

 

[smelly07]

Personally, I struggle to reconcile myself with the idea that some babies need to be left alone to sleep. Not saying that it doesn't happen..just that I've always believed babies prefer to be nursed/rocked/held to sleep.

My own LO is nursed to sleep (or rocked if I am not there). Very rarely does she pull away from the breast, turn away and sleep. Even when she does, she will be somewhat asleep, and not crying.

I find it hard to believe that a baby would prefer to cry to sleep. I know my view is narrow here, and this is not to say that I know every baby etc..its just my own difficulty with this CC/CIO thing.

i can safely say that they dont!

the majority of babies i have looked after in my career self settled even if that did involve a few mins crying due to over tiredness/stimulation.

however its the babies that DO want it and DONT get it that doesnt sit comfortably with me, i couldnt personally do that. x

I thought self-settling meant being able to go to sleep without the need for rocking etc but also without crying? Because crying denotes a need?

Also, did you look after these children straight from birth? What approach did their parents have from birth?

alot of babies cry when tired so when putting them down for a sleep they are still crying for a short while and then they self settle and fall asleep....thats if you miss the 'im tired signs' generally they will self settle without crying but not always.....
i looked after babies 3 months + .........parenting approaches varied .......not all babies self settled some needed rocking etc but the majority would self settle no problem.

some parents would insist we didnt rock their child to sleep......even though the babies would scream and cry, literally cry themselves to sleep.

All babies are different and all settle in different ways..........being rocked, fed, a dummy, or nothing at all.

 

[nosocks]

are you actually in Nairobi?

Sure am.

 

[Gen79]

some parents would insist we didnt rock their child to sleep......even though the babies would scream and cry, literally cry themselves to sleep.

 

[Lightworker]

are you actually in Nairobi?

Sure am.

so awesome, I love Nairobi.. x

 

[smelly07]

some parents would insist we didnt rock their child to sleep......even though the babies would scream and cry, literally cry themselves to sleep.

I know.....it was hard but we had to follow parents wishes.

 

[Lightworker]

some parents would insist we didnt rock their child to sleep......even though the babies would scream and cry, literally cry themselves to sleep.

I know.....it was hard but we had to follow parents wishes.

What were their reasons, do you know?

 

[Gen79]

some parents would insist we didnt rock their child to sleep......even though the babies would scream and cry, literally cry themselves to sleep.

I know.....it was hard but we had to follow parents wishes.

I'm thinking of registering as a childminder and will not take babies because of this.

Also, because most ap babies who bedshare with the mother don't seem to self settle until they're at least 1.5, I'm not sure I beleive that all these babies did on their own. I think a lot of people outside of b&b do cc/cio much younger than 6 months. I even know people in real life who have.

I know some babies do self settle youngish on their own, but I think thats the exception. The AP boards where parents will not leave babies for more than a minute are filled with questions about when will they finally learn to self settle.