Introducing Ava Lysia

[Nessicle]

Finally getting round to writing my birth story as my laptop has been broken!

Gosh where do i start....?!

Well little miss was due on 17 December and after my second sweep on Monday 27 December I had given up hope that she was actually ever going to come! So that night when my waters broke in bed I was completely shocked and taken by surprise! I was literally swimming in the stuff lol

I got a towel wedged down there and got stripped off but I was in shock and shaking its such a bizarre sensation when your waters go like that! OH came in fully dressed, hat on and bags at the ready - think he was a bit keen..?!

I called delivery and they said to wait til my contractions had started and were 5 mins apart and then to go down. I had a cuppa and got bouncing on my ball!#

within half an hour my contractions had started and were pretty strong and as the weather wasnt too good I decided I felt better getting down there asap.

went on the maternity assessment unit to wait for a bed on delivery and my contractions were pretty strong so I had some gas and air but it was out of the cannister and i didnt find t helped much so I had diamorphine which was great! Highly recommend it!

the mw decided not to examine me just yet as she didnt want to introduce any infection and knew the mw delivering Ava would want to examine me.

After about 4 hours I got a bed on delivery, examined and was 4cm. My waters had been gone about 8 hours now and the mw wanted to get things going so she said I would be put on syntocin drip. I had my epidural at this point before the drip which was fabulous!

Over the course of the next 12 hours the drip had to be sped up constantly as I wasnt dilating fast enough. I kept having breakthrugh pain and had t have the epidural topped up constantly and at one point i was using gas and air on top of it.

Finally around 2am, just over 24 hours in, I was fully dilated. Ava's head was still quite high so the mw said I would have to push hard to bring her down and I had a max of 2 hours before forceps would be tried.

I spent just over two hours pushing hard after no sleep or food all day before the mw decided somethng wasnt quite right. A doctor came to see me and my legs were put in stirrups and the doc spent an undignified amount of time fishing around inside me before deciding forceps would need to be used.

I was prepped for theatre in case i needed a section, OH put on scrubs and we were taken down. I was given a complete spinal block but I was so out of it I dont really remember much I remember OH being there and lots of people in the room while my legs were stirrupped up. Two sizes of forceps were used and i remember being told to push but unfortunately Ava's head was in the wrong position, her heart rate was dipping and they decided they needed to get her out.

An emergency section was done and i remember telling them I was in pain - I dont know if I was or whether it was psychological but the anaesthetist topped up the spinal block.

Ava Lysia was finally born at 4.51am on 29/12 weighing 8lb 15oz.

I was too out of it to hold her straightaway and OH had nearly passed out so mum held her while I was stitched up. Mum brought her to me to look at and I remember vaguely crying because I didnt get skin to skin contact. i lost a litre of blood and had to have a transfusion.

It was an hour before I got to hold her and got her to latch on but I was so exhausted she didnt latch on properly and bit my nipples raw. I struggled with bf and she screamed for two days until gave in and asked for formula and she gulped it down.

im still waiting for my milk to come in, expressing everyday to try to stimulate it but i wont lie i feel like a failure right now and pretty upset about the birth still.

i have a beautiful, healthy baby girl so trying my best to remember that but I do feel robbed of moments I'll never get back and its nobodies fault just one of those things!

xxx

 

[camerashy]

oh hunni that was a long hard labour .....but dont feel like a failure...how cud u be??!!! look what you've brought into the world ....and gorgeous lil girl!!!
i think u did brilliantly!!!

 

[doctordeesmrs]

Congrats she's beautiful

 

[CelticNiamh]

Ness I understand completely were your coming from, I had a similar labour with my first DS except he showed signs of distress so I was taken down to try a ventouse if that failed it was c section, I was give 3 chances to get him out and I felt him move even the using the ventouse said once more and we would have him but the consultant said no he said he had enough and section now, so he was born by emergency c section I got a quick glance at him I think DH got to hold him I was not in a great state my self. but my mum and mil held him before I did, actually it was my mum who said to my MIL that I should have him so it was an after thought to finally let me have my own baby

BF was hard at first as well, but one thing to remember is that some times after a csection it takes 5 days instead of 3 for the milk to come in.

If I can help with the BF let me know

You did amazing and should be very proud of your self that was a lot to go through.
Ava is amazing

 

[Nessicle]

thanks honey im very tearful atm just thnking about the birth and shes 11 days old tomorrow and still no milk fw drops thats all

i feel so upst i cant feed her

 

[mommyB]

Congratulations, she's beautiful!

 

[Blondie007]

Ava is beautiful, you have done an amazing job xxx

 

[CelticNiamh]

thanks honey im very tearful atm just thnking about the birth and shes 11 days old tomorrow and still no milk fw drops thats all

i feel so upst i cant feed her

Just remember for every onze you get she gets double babies are so much better than us at getting milk out, plus the more you feed the more you make.

Ive never been able to fill a bottle max when I was expressing was 2 onzes plus that was when my DS was like 4 weeks old, I hope the MW on Monday can help you feel better if you really want to BF then there are ways you can do it and if not and you decided bottle is better then there is no shame in that you are not a failure we are awful at giving our self's guilt trips

when you do feed her can you see her swallowing or does she suck and suck and then cry and pull away, when are you expressing before or after her feeds after I wouldn't expect you to get much, but also if your feeling stressed and worried about it it might effect the let down as well

I felt the same as you after the birth, felt robbed of doing it my self, I was afraid when I had another baby that it would be the same thing and another Csection. so I reserched it and planned so when I did have my second son he was natural and he was huge compared to my first DS this will be my 4th VBAC I hope any way.

dont worry take you time make peace with how her birth went and dont be to hard on your self and enjoy your little girl.

PS did you get the 3 day blues at all I know on day 3 the slightest thing and I was in tears, the one time I didnt it hit me bad around the week mark hormones still getting us

 

[Minnie_me]

I'm not going to tell you not to be upset - you have a right to your feelings but I will say you were a real trooper and you have produced the most gorgeous little girl - congratulations.

 

[Nessicle]

thank you for all the kind words everyone xx

celtic, I got really tearful around day 4 and it hasnt let up yet! slightest thing has me crying! going for elective c section next time I darent risk the same thing hapenig

mw told me to express 4 times a day for 20 mins each time but I dnt have the time i do it when shes had her bottle xx

 

[flubdub]

Wow, what a story. You should be so proud! That was such a long birth - everyone would be exhausted and emotional at the end of it.
I can sympathise with the milk thing. With my second son, I wasnt going to BF, but when he was a few days old, I felt overwhelmingly guilty that I wasnt BFing. So, I started trying to feed him myself, and expressing whenever I could. It was SUCH hard work, and, I wont lie, I never really got my supply to a decent amount. I could feed him at night, and maybe a few ounces throughout the day. I kept it up for 6 months regardless of the tiny amount he was getting, but REALLY stressed myself out about it - it was crazy really.
Dont feel bad. She will be fine if she is FF. I know that probably wont make you feel better, as its a very personal thing, but dont feel like a failure.
You being happy is more important than where she gets her milk from.

 

[flubdub]

Also, kellymom give great advice.
Here is a link to a section on their website on bottlefeeding and pumping.

https://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/index.html

 

[CelticNiamh]

Check out the La leche league website if you get a chance, may be check there is a BF class or group near you as well they might be able to help

What I would do, is feed her my self then top her up with an onz or two of formula then when you feel your supply is increasing you can decreas and cut out the bottle or do both do the night feeds your self and feed bottle at certain times in the day.
It is important to feed at night as that sets up the demand of the following day, but dont kill your self the most important thing now is a happy mummy as that = happy baby.

Plus you have given her an excellent start any amount of Breast milk is better than none plus if it is bottle feeding leading the way she will thrive as wel

Oh dont forget to mention feeling teary to MW get it all out that what she is for, I hope it passes and you can relax and enjoy Ava even more than you are becuase I know your on

 

[CelticNiamh]

Also, kellymom give great advice.
Here is a link to a section on their website on bottlefeeding and pumping.

https://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/index.html

Thanks for that link, thats a great site, I will get some tips my self I think

 

[flubdub]

Also, kellymom give great advice.
Here is a link to a section on their website on bottlefeeding and pumping.

https://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/index.html

Thanks for that link, thats a great site, I will get some tips my self I think

Yeah it was a god send to me when I was struggling.

 

[Nessicle]

Thank you girls I'll check out those websites. I put her on my breast in the night before giving a bottle to see if I can satisfy her which it doesn't yet but hoping it will! I keep latching her on when I can but cos she's bottle fed her suck isn't that hard she does take long slow gulps sometimes but mostly she just does small sucks

 

[CelticNiamh]

Thank you girls I'll check out those websites. I put her on my breast in the night before giving a bottle to see if I can satisfy her which it doesn't yet but hoping it will! I keep latching her on when I can but cos she's bottle fed her suck isn't that hard she does take long slow gulps sometimes but mostly she just does small sucks

Try offering the breast before you bottle feed her, hunger is a great sauce! I dont mean let her starve or wait till she is wailing with hunger! but she will try that little harder to get the milk YKWIM try masasaging your breast befrore hand tpwards the nipple or express a little till you see it flowing a little just to get you going to start with, might get you going a bit better that website that flubdub posted is brilliant!!

Your doing great hun

 

[zoe87]

congratulations she is gorgeous ness! x

 

[Rebaby]

I'm sorry you had such a difficult birth congratulations on your beautiful baby girl, she is gorgeous and i love the name choice too. Well done

 

[gemmax89]

Sounds like we had a really simular labour story! I also had an epidural and spinal block, I also had to go into theatre and have an emergency c-section because her head was in the wrong position and got stuck and her heartrate started to decelerate.. how's your scar? mine has got infected and im struggling to heal!