Knew it was too good to be true

Discussion in 'Waiting To Try' started by Bmary83, Mar 18, 2010.

  1. Bmary83

    Bmary83 Well-Known Member

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    Well after arguing wi OH over the whole baby thing, to have him say we can try in Oct, he let slip lst night then confirmed today that he was not ready to TTC in oct and had no intention any time soon.

    Am so bummed, I was worried that he was jus saying it to pacify me! Am so bummed right now :(
     
  2. nikileigh

    nikileigh Well-Known Member

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    Men can be so inconsiderate sometimes! Has he gave u a reason y??

    chin up
     
  3. Tinkermoo

    Tinkermoo NTNP

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    Awww bummer:( So sorry to hear that. Can you try talking to him? find out why he feels this way? Maybe you could reach a compromise:)
     
  4. Amygdala

    Amygdala Well-Known Member

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    Most men seem to go through a phase like that. They keep changing their minds for a while and at some point they just click and are ready. Hope he'll get there soon! :hugs:
     
  5. princess_bump

    princess_bump Happy Wife & Mumma!

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    :( so sorry to hear this :hugs: hope you can both agree a date soon :hugs: xx
     
  6. plutosblue

    plutosblue Mum of 2 & duffed.

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    Sorry to hear about your OH :hugs: But better you know now than the month before, now THAT would have driven me insane. Men are so irritating sometimes..
     
  7. luckyme225

    luckyme225 Well-Known Member

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    Boys can be really silly sometimes when it comes to setting a date. I hope you guys settle on a date soon. :hugs:
     
  8. Smile181c

    Smile181c Mummy to 3!

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    Ah that sucks :( Men just don't understand how much having a child means to a woman sometimes. Is there no way you two could have a conversation about a compromise? And just try to not let it turn into an argument cause everyone says things they don't mean when they're angry. It really is true that a woman becomes a mother when she first thinks about having a baby and a man only becomes a father when he has the baby in his arms! xx
     
  9. Damita

    Damita Mummy of 2 <3

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    so sorry to hear that hun
     
  10. LolaAnn

    LolaAnn cautiously PALs!

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    My hubby did the same thing to me. Even worse I read an email of his recently (accidentally fell pregnant) where he let slip that he had always been misleading me and never actually intended to go thru with being a young dad like he always said he wanted....
     
  11. Smile181c

    Smile181c Mummy to 3!

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    Wow that's a bit harsh! Did you confront him about it? Sorry to hear that though xx
     
  12. amyclaire

    amyclaire TTC late July 2010 :D

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    Can't really add anything more to what's been said, to put it simply they sometimes just don't get it. I've been through it to and it hurts so much. I really hope you manage to work something out that's makes u feel happier xxxx
     
  13. TattooedMama

    TattooedMama Bubba, Daddy & Belly

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    I'm sorry honey!! I would try to calmly talk to him about iot, ask him why he feels that way and tell him you are disappointed but want to understand where he's coming from. Men are ridiculous, guaranteed he will tell u out of the blue when he is ready and it will probably be sooner than he thinks
     
  14. Bmary83

    Bmary83 Well-Known Member

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    Thanks everyone! We've had all the big talks etc n I thought we were actually getting somewhere now. Am so hurt right now I don't even wanna look at him! Jus feel that, as usual, I'm the one making all compromises!

    Sorry to be a moan!
     
  15. Miss_d

    Miss_d Well-Known Member

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    thats ashame, i think u should sit him down and speak 2 him and fully discuss the situation, hope uz get it sorted :)

    x
     
  16. ericarae1

    ericarae1 Active Member

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    My bf kinda did that too. But then we sat down and seriously talked about it. (He knew from day 1 that I wanted a family with in a couple of years or so.) I had to give in for a couple more years than I wanted but I also wanted him to be ready. So we've both agreed on a date to start TTC. I would rather him tell me what he really wants than lead me on and the find out differently later on. Good luck! Give him some time maybe he'll change his mind.
     
  17. Bmary83

    Bmary83 Well-Known Member

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    I just effing hate him right now. He's doing everything possible to get round me and try to get things back to normal, how convenient for him! Thing is I had already decided to stop taking the pill n start charting for 6 months so I've no pill left to take. He was like, so are u gonna go back on it? I'm like NO. He announced tonight that he needed to go to asda for "toiletries". I'm like u don't need condoms cuz we're not having sex anytime soon.

    The other day he asked wat are we going to do now n I said lets jus forget about the whole thing n he said why cudn u jus do that in the first place. Cheeky fecker! There was no compromise offered, jus ok, I'm not ready anyway so thats that prob sorted.

    So mad at him!
     
  18. Bmary83

    Bmary83 Well-Known Member

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    Sorry for ranting! He also announced that he came on here n read all my posts.

    So if u reading this Dear, we're not OK, things are not being conveniently forgotten, n there will be no sex!!!
     
  19. Amygdala

    Amygdala Well-Known Member

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    Where does he get off reading your posts on here? That's a complete invasion of your privacy. Yeah, I know it's a public forum but why would he stalk you? Seems like he's checking up on you. He must have been quite freaked out by the whole thing to go that far? But the thing is, he should have talked to you. It's so respectless to knowingly risk hurting your feelings that way. I can totally understand why you're so upset with him and I think if I was in your situation, it would take a lot of talking things out for me to regain trust.
     
  20. Bmary83

    Bmary83 Well-Known Member

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    Hey guys! I've not posted on here for a while due to all the above. At me the mo, we're trying to make a go of things and "concentrate on us" (which means at the mo, I'm am not even remotely allowed to mention anything to do with babies and my wants n needs/broodiness).

    I am going along with it for now, my reasoning being, I need to be sure I am not pushing the baby thing just because I feel there is something wrong in our relationship. I need to be sure I'm happy with him baby or no baby.

    I'll be honest I'm feeling resentful at the min as it feels that yet again, he is putting himself before me (yesterday he went out n spent thousands on a new motorbike). But I think I need to give it one last try and stick to my original make or break deadline of Feb-2011. In the meantime I'm thinking about going into training to do a 10k run, I'll have fully paid of my car and another few pounds will have bn paid off our mortgage putting me in a better position financially to go it alone.

    So, thats where things stand at the mo!
     

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