light hearted ttc

[hello_kitty]

I see some color as well Jo. Have you tested again and good a better result?

Same here Ashley, even when we are not fighting I still dont want to have sex with him. The only relationship we have atm is a civil one and I cant imagine being passionate. I raise the same question as well, if I dont want to have sex how in the world am I going to have another baby? At the same time though, it might be a good idea afterall because its not fair for the baby to be born into this. I mean, whats the purpose of another baby anyway? Isnt it supposed to be a product of love between the two, and when its not there...I just find it meaningless.

 

[josephine3]

Thanx guys, iv done a whole barrage of tests since then, most with squinty lines but none i can call bfp. Heres the best one.

 

[hello_kitty]

Thanx guys, iv done a whole barrage of tests since then, most with squinty lines but none i can call bfp. Heres the best one.

I dont see anything on this one.

 

[josephine3]

Well after this test today with a pretty convinving line irl i got af

 

[AC1987]

aww I'm sorry Jo!! It sucks when you wanna see a line but don't!!

I feel the same way Lily... I don't know what is happening. I wish I could go back to feeling madly in love with my dh where I could overlook all the bad qualities..
I mean yes there were awful times before marriage but I was so gung ho on marrying him and so in love that I didn't care, and I thought of marriage meaning happily ever after. I just wish I had someone tell me I was making a mistake before I got married.
Lately there is even problems with how we raise our kids, we both grew up with different views, and I always just assumed he'd go with the way I was raised only he has very different views, and its hard to explain to the kids why daddy says one thing and mama says another..

 

[josephine3]

Oh we get that too just on silly things i say one way he wants to do it another!

 

[ricschick]

Hi guys

so sorry you guys are going through this right now! it seems to me if your unhappy and not inlove then you need to work out where you go from there, ac have you spoken to anyone about your rights? and lily do you see you guys sorting it maybe counciling? but if you don't life is too short to be in a loveless relationship and the children are better off with happy separate parents rather than miserable parents together.

jo is hubby still living in the caravan? are you ttc? I couldn't see pics properly as it wouldn't zoom in when I clicked on it.

we are going to ttc in January! last baby as dh will be getting the snip after this one.

everyone ready for Christmas?

 

[AC1987]

Aww that's great rics!!

yes ready for Christmas! Can't wait to see the kids faces as they open their gifts


I'm not entirely sure what my rights are, like I don't want to do anything that would risk me not getting my kids. And seeing how scary he got when he thought there was another man I don't think that'd be an option to go either.

Sometimes it feels like everyone has a better marriage than me.

 

[josephine3]

Hey rics thats great cant wait to see ur next bfp! No we are not ttc im just crazy lol. The pcos gives me terrible pregnancy symptoms right before af its messing with my mind! Yes hes still in the caravan tho stops over often. Mostly it has helped our relationship altho things still arent great they're not quite as bad! We're not married btw he doesnt 'believe' in it

 

[josephine3]

And whilst i kno its not ideal circumstances to bring a baby into (when is it ever?) I just dont think i could cope with how complex life would get if i was to go off and have a baby with someone else!! I kno hed always be a dad to our children too which isnt a guarantee id get with somone new. Plus im 30 now so to meet someone and get to a point where we're ready to ttc within 5 yrs is pushing it a bit!
Realistically he wont even consider another until jamies at school so that gives us a couple of years to try and make things better!

 

[ricschick]

Aww that's great rics!!

yes ready for Christmas! Can't wait to see the kids faces as they open their gifts


I'm not entirely sure what my rights are, like I don't want to do anything that would risk me not getting my kids. And seeing how scary he got when he thought there was another man I don't think that'd be an option to go either.

Sometimes it feels like everyone has a better marriage than me.

that's why I think finding out where you stand will atleast give you the knowledge! I don't see why anyone would take your children for leaving your marriage. x

 

[ricschick]

jo your not the only crazy one lol I often think I might be pregnant and im still on the pill lol!

 

[hello_kitty]

imo, if a couple bickers over trivial matters and they can get over it within an hour, its not really an issue, almost all couples are like this. On the other hand, if it gets to the point where both or at least 1 person is miserable every single day, and start to regret being with that person in the first place, thats a much bigger issue, and bringing a baby into this mess is not fair. This is where I stand right now, and although I definitely feel like I want more kids at some point, I have to try and prevent myself from doing something I would regret during spur of the moment. This is a human being we're talking about. I hate to have a child, and then during our worst moments feel like my new child is a mistake that I knowingly brought into this. At least with Zach and Jayden they were conceived before we started having problems.

Sometimes, I imagine that I would be happier as a single mom. Yes, it will be harder, and there will be a financial strain but I know he wouldnt abandon his children and will help provide for them. I just dont want to split the family up. I'm just so tired of him as a person. Like he doesnt go to bed until 5 am and then get cranky the next day and put it out on us or at least me. He always snaps at me if he didnt get enough sleep and thats all his damn fault because he chose to stay up and watch tv. He wants to go back to visit his family as a family and I am so not looking forward to it, I mean I cant even deal with him, how in the world am I gonna deal with his family?

 

[josephine3]

Dont worry lily he wont let us ttc now anyway, and i totally see ur point i kno im being selfish wanting another its just such a strong urge to ignore!!

 

[hello_kitty]

Jo - It is totally up to you hun. I was mostly referring to myself. Maybe your guys's relationship is better off than ours. I dont even know where we stand at the moment, he acts like nothing is wrong but I'm just so unhappy and I if I bring it up it always ends in an argument. He owns a business so I know he is overworked, but I just feel upset when he is cranky all the time. I know he cant help it, but when he's cranky it rubs me the wrong way.

 

[josephine3]

I just dont want to get too old for more and regret it. It would be hard to regret having a baby cos ud have another beautiful child!

 

[hello_kitty]

I get where youre coming from. I just turned 27, so i will probably feel the same way in a few years. However, i did want my kids close in age though. Preferably with a 2 year gap max but Jaydens almost 2.5 and we're not ttc so didnt end up like i planned, and as each day passes by i feel frustrated. I dont want a massive age gap but dh doesnt seem bothered by it.

 

[josephine3]

I actually wudnt mind a bigger age gap between 2 and 3 but only as big as time allows!

 

[AC1987]

I have that strong urge to be pregnant again too! So I get where you're coming from Jo! However I also get where Lily is coming from, I just can't stand being with my dh at the moment.
Take this weekend for example we were at my in laws for a Christmas get together and he spent the entire time ignoring everyone just on his laptop. And everyone kept looking at ME as if it was my fault.
And I already feel like a single parent he does nothing to help me, like yes he pays bills, but that is it.

Rics... I could try to look into it.

 

[josephine3]

Merry christmas ladies!xxx