--Lion Cubs - Mummy and Baby Group!-- We are all One Year Old!

[Mimiso]

Ruby Rose - so sorry to hear that your MIL is being such a pain. She of all people should know that after giving birth it is always good to give the mum some rest, after all she has given birth before. That is so hard for you as it causes a lot of tension given that it is your OH's mum. Good on you for standing up to her, at least she now knows that she cant go around running her mouth and expecting you to put up with it. She is surely one selfish cow..... Hope things quieten down for you soon. Sorry that Archie is windy again, hope that clears soon too (((((((hugs)))))

Jelr - my little one sleeps a lot during the day, she is rather lazy though tbh

everyone else, hope you are well xx

 

[costgang]

what a dick i am!!!! im going to do a bootsale today, to get sum extra money coz we are going away in 2 weeks and ive got loads of junk to get rid of. so i decided to kill 2 birds,anyway, i set my alarm for 5.15 to give me time to get ready and get josh ready, im taking him oh is having other 2.josh woke up at 5, so i got up then got dressed went downstairs its 4oclock, id hit the wrong button when setting the alarm and managed to put my clock an hour forward, what a dick

 

[tmr1234]

Vici~ birll that ur lo slept thow hope it is the start of meny

MJ~ Sorry ur appointment went bad

jelr~ congrats on the full nights hope it lasts. lucas dose not sleep at all in the day well the last 2 days he has fell asleep in my arms i put him down and he wakes agane little bugger

Elly~ i love sudocrem use it all the time and did with rueben

Mollyapple~ i hear you about the nipping out thing with 2 kids it takes 10 each child to get out the door and that is befor lucas thinks its a good time to have a poo lol

rubyrose~ sorry you are having a hard time with mil

 

[Mary Jo]

My baby boy Adam is 8 weeks and 7 minutes old!

 

[Mary Jo]

jelr, Adam is also unpredictable in his daytime sleeping - he will usually fall asleep after a feed and some days, like yesterday, he will let me put him in his moses basket and fall back asleep. other times he isn't sleeping deeply enough and wakes completely and fusses. I don't put him into his cot in the bedroom during the day because I want him to associate it with going to sleep at night-time when he has a longer sleep and it's dark and quiet, not a time to play.

so no set, predictable routine. though we're having periods of definite "playtime" now, so it's not just feeding--sleeping--nappy, which is good because he feels so much more rewarding.

 

[Mary Jo]

ruby, you have my deepest sympathies over the MIL situation. I can identify to an extent though it's not as severe for me as for you. it sounds horrendous.

my MIL isn't officially my MIL as we're not married but it would be no different if we were, so...

our situation is different in that AE is not her only or first grandchild, in fact she has 2 others born within the last 6 months. it takes the pressure off, but she is still demanding and annoying. does your husband stand up to her? my OH does, some of the time, which is a help. also she doesn't live with us or near enough to be coming over or demanding we go to her all the time (it still feels a bit like it, and we get especially annoyed when she expects us to make the hour+ drive to her to fit in with her schedule and then gets upset when we say no!)

on the one had I want AE to have a relationship with his grandmother, on the other I'd not care if we never saw her again. there's nothing (right now anyway) that she does that makes our lives easier, on the contrary, she adds stress and that's it. so she's selfish. whereas my mum comes to stay and she helps enormously, there is nothing she wouldn't do to help us, she is a very very unselfish woman. they're very different people but it boils down to one thinks the world revolves around her and the other doesn't.

hang in there, hopefully it'll get better as Archie gets older. but she sounds like an abusive woman, toxic, and maybe you just need a thick skin against her and her vicious, nasty tongue.

 

[Mary Jo]

aunty E, I hear you on the BCG - ideally I'd refuse it as well for Adam as well, but I believe there is TB in Lewisham as well and although we don't at present go to mother & baby groups, I hope we will at some point. also, we're not planning on moving out of our flat for at least a year and might even stay in this area. so I think it's unwise for us to refuse it. we also use public transport. not often but I don't drive and while I walk as much as I can, walking is not always a reasonable option (for example, to get into central London before 9am!!)

do babies scar with it? just that my mum is certain I had a BCG as a baby (1974), I think because we'd had TB in the family, though am not definite on that. I also had a BCG when I was 12, despite the skin test being inconclusive, they decided they were not sure if I had immunity and gave it to me again. that one scarred, not badly, but this is me looking at it now 23 years later. I seem to recall at the time it spewed green goo everywhere when the scab got knocked off...

where are you planning on moving to? if we stay in the London area but leave Lewisham it would likely be towards Kingston/Teddington sort of way. no idea if they have TB over there.

 

[Mary Jo]

I had a call from a different health visitor on friday, asking if she can make an appointment to come and see me and my daughter next week. *shakes head* while I am glad not to have to deal with the cat-phobic one any more, I really think they should get something as basic as the sex of my baby right before making the call! I feel like I'm off on the wrong foot with this one as well now. meh!

am sort-of dreading it. scared AE hasn't gained enough weight to be on the right line in the growth chart and I'll get told off.

oh, and molly, about the lack of communication from these damned health people - at this bad appointment on Thursday, the GP said "he can have his injections on Wednesday", but nothing more than that... now I know I should have said "eh? what? where?" but I didn't... it felt like I was expected to know. maybe the HV clinic is on Wednesday? no idea. nobody has ever told me!

still considering moving GPs. jelr, I like your idea of saying, if I need to go back to my old one, that it didn't work out, I wanted to try it as it's closer and so we could all be together but I was wrong and this one is nicer. flattery, yep, I think that might be the way to go if I have to.

 

[augustbaby09]

hi mia turned 7 weeks yesterday is it bad that she has caught my cold already...?I feel awful - she is sneezing (mind you she does that often anyways) At around 3am last night she woke up fussing and since then she been having the occasional cough and has crusty looking nose (although she has that sometimes) - but she got a snuffle with it too. She hardly slept as when put her on her back im guessing mucus trickles down her throat. Ive checked her temp and so far she is fine. She is feeding and isnt having any problems so far. However with this snuffley noise sh emakes and chesty sound im guessing she has caught it.

Its a saturday too so cant take her doctors. Do you think she will be ok - and if she seems very distressed or has a temp then either go hospital or phone for a doctor call out...? She still smiling and seems ok jsut bit unsettled - and is having to be held to my chest and upright in order to get comfortable..

I just feel so bad that a baby so young is unwell and there nothing i can give her.... xx

 

[Shiv]

August baby - Sophia is just getting over a cold. It sounded a lot worse than it was - thought she was going to choke on snot! As long your baby doesn't have a temperature then the doctor will not really be able to do much. You can get saline nose drops at the chemist or tescos that you can put one drop in each nostril as required and this helps to clear the snot. You can also get snuffle baby which is a baby version of vicks vapour rub. You could also try raising the head end of LO's moses/ crib/ cot. i just put a book under each leg of her moses basket stand.

On the upside your LO will get lots of immunity from fighting off this cold!

I hope your LO gets better quickly - and try not to worry - lots of he babies in hhere have had colds recently

 

[cleckner04]

Augustbaby we just got over colds as well. I did take her in to see the doctor and they told me the same thing Shiv said, unless there is a temperature than it's nothing to worry about. Our issue was congestion and her tearing off my breast to get a breath and than being frantic to get back on. Needless to say, the boobs are sore again now. I felt bad bc I'm the one that had the cold first and I passed it to her either through contact or my breastmilk. to you. Hope your LO feels better soon.

 

[Shiv]

jelr - it really varies how much Sophia sleeps during the day. Yesterday she slept pretty much all day, so much so that I was conviced she wouldn't sleep at night - but she did - hooray!

RR - massive hugs lovely - your MiL sounds like a complete nightmare. Well done for standing up to her, I hope your hubby backs you up. It sounds like she is never gonna be a big enough person to admit her behaviour was wrong and apologise. Perhaps for your own sanity you need to put it down to experience and try to move on. What she did was unacceptable but unfortunately you can't change that now (if you have another baby I wouldn't tel her you have gone into labour that way she can't come visit!). I would work on trying to keep her in line for the future, set some rules (yes you will have to treat her like a child by the sounds of her!), like she can only come into yourhouse if she is going to be polite etc. I know it is hard and by no means do i mean you shold forgive her but if it is stressin gyou out then maybe you need to try and let it go. I also think you should steer clear of her for a while, if you are stressed out so will Archie be. Get your hubby to explain to her that she upsets you and this upsets Archie so you want some time without her visiting while you establish your routine.
As for Archie, I hope he settles a bit oon and this is just a brief phase - I am sure you have tried infacol etc, so again big hugs x

Costgang - i assume you were first in line at the car boot sale then??

MJ - happy birthday to Adam!

Cleck - glad Emma is over her cold x

 

[cleckner04]

MJ I'm always scared about weight gain as well. Emma is pretty tiny still and I have fears of getting completely lectured at her next appointment. It wouldn't be the first time they've lectured. It's almost as if they want you to feel as bad as possible. At her first appointment a nurse who was REALLY young so I'd be surprised if she even had kids of her own, got on her high horse and said "this is your first kid isn't it". I was exhausted, struggling with breastfeeding, upset that Emma wasn't gaining weight super well, and than she said that. I wanted to smack her across the face.

 

[Mary Jo]

cleck, people who say "it's your first isn't it" - I also want to hit because I usually take it as an utterly patronising comment and feel insulted! that's probably due to my own insecurity... I just wish, though, that all health professionals had some tact and sensitivity when it comes to new mums. I have met some lovely people who've not got across me at all but others have got my back right up. all mums were a first-time mum once, as one myself now, I'm acutely aware of it and how you probably thnk I am doing a terrible job, thank you!!

(yes I am sometimes paranoid and on red alert for perceived slights... )

 

[rubyrose]

Thanks girls. Well after persuasian hubby managed to get her to apolgize to my dad which is something at least it was unfair the way she spoke about me in my dads house with him there, i realise now i will never get 1 but at least my dad did!! btw will NEVER have kids again at least not with her about dont think i could take all of this again so archie is an only child lol!

 

[Mary Jo]

oh, and cleck, I was just reading about baby growth charts and found some stuff about how the World Health Organisation has a new chart based on breastfed babies, since bf babies tend to gain weight slower than formula fed; this is all so recent that it probably won't yet be the one that most docs and health visitors use, yet if they did they might lay off bf mums whose babies are gaining slower than the old chart says.

BBC news story from May here

another link with a link to download the actual charts here

apparently the charts have already been introduced in England... no idea if they are going to be elsewhere

 

[ShadowRat]

Hey guys, sorry I've not posted much the last couple of days, had sooo much going on! My mum is back from France and it was lovely to spend some time with her yesterday. Also we went to pick up yet another huuuge stack of beautiful hand-me-down stuff from a friend of mine who has two boys, she's given us so much already, we are very lucky! She has very similar taste in baby clothes to me and she takes care of her stuff so well, we have a gorgeous stack now!! Thank goodness I get to pass it on to my sis in law who is having a BOY in February! Not sure if I've posted about that yet, but they kinda wanted a girl (it's their first together, her first overall, she's really excited!) but they had their gender scan recently and found out it's a boy. But it's great for me as I can pass on loads of stuff. It's a shame they live so far away (Holland) cos I have to post it all, but that's ok!! Feels great to be able to "pay it forward"

Jelr, on your question about napping during the day, Vince has no schedule at all: He just cat naps all day. It seems to work pretty well for him

Ruby you poor thing, what a hideously insensitive cow your mil is Just remember that it doesn't really matter what she thinks, she's clearly a total biatch, just try to ignore her rubbish as much as you can and focus on Archie and your life with him Sorry you have to deal with her at all

MJ *sigh* How annoying that the new HV got something so basic wrong!! Hopefully she just had a lot on her mind and she's actually a really good HV, glad you don't have to put up with the slightly annoying cat hater anymore!!

Cleck, I hope they don't treat you like crap at your next check up for Emma, I'm sure her weight is fine, over here they tend to say if the baby seems content most of the time (I don't think I've ever heard of a baby as content as your little lady!!) then there's no reason to worry. You're doing such a smashing job of BF exclusively, well done girl!! Ugh @ "this is your first, isn't it?" Sometimes it's all in the tone of voice, saying something like that can never be helpful can it?!?

Oooh MJ that's really interesting about the BF charts, I think that's a very good idea really cos you just cannot compare an exclusively formula fed baby to an exclusively breast fed baby: Ok, FF babis are usually bigger, but BF babies are most definitely getting the better deal, and the stats back it up that BF is the very best for baby, so it doesn't make sense to compare them really!

AFU: Vince slept 12 hours last night OH's stepdad says in a couple of weeks he'll be sleeping through the day too!! I think we've got a really good routine now, we're all super happy with it, so I hope it stays like this or similar for a while. Here's our new, improved routine! -

8/8:30 am ish: Vince wakes, either his dad or I get him out of his cot and bring him to our bed for snuggles, bonding time and a feed (LOTS of smiling every day at this point, it's lush!) then we both get up and take him down for nappy change and to get dressed. Then he goes till about 12ish before his next feed, then he goes pretty much 3 hours between each feed for the rest of the day, so it's 12pm, 3pm, 6pm and then 8 / 8:30 ish we bathe him (LOTS more smiles and generally having an awesome time splashing in the bath like a crazy loon!!) then we dry him off and feed him and swaddle him for bed at about 9ish (last night it was more like 8:30, but that's cool ) and then he settles right away in his cot and doesn't make a sound (most nights) until 8/8:30 ish the next morning He's also just starting to "laugh", it's not quite a laugh just yet but it's like hyper breathing with a smile on his face, most often when I make crazy faces and noises at him and "bop" his nose with a finger!

So we're doing really well here occasionally he still has a bit of a windy problem, but it's less and less often now (actually yesterday he had a big one, he squealed SOOOO loudly and SOOO high pitched like he was being murdered or something and I freaked a bit thinking "god, have I pulled a toe off somehow or something?!?" but I think it must have been a very sharp windy pain. But most of the time now he's pretty contented, so that's great He's still not lifting his head off the ground from lying on his tummy (well, he can, but only a little and he doesn't like to do it much) and he's still not rolling over on his own at all, but he can sit upright really well now with his a little support (without support he'd still fall over, but he's getting there!) and he's holding his head up beautifully now with minimal wobbling! So I'm not going to worry about the lack of rolling and head lifting from tummy...

One last thing, I've been having LOADS of dreams of being pregnant again, last night was a nasty one, I dreamed that we had this X Ray machine randomly in our house and as I walked past it I saw a HUGE baby in my tummy (but I wasn't even showing from the outside!) and I freaked cos I'd thought I was on my period (I am again now, 2nd one since V was born) and all this blood was pouring out of me!! I remember thinking "oh no, I have my Mooncup in, what will that be doing to the baby?!" weeeird.... OH and I are talking a little bit about the possibility of a second now it all seems so much less scary now than it did when V was super tiny!

LOL ok, just ONE more thing: Are any of you guys finding yourselves using random nicknames for your little ones? OH and I call Vincent "Cenzo" (like Vincenzo, the italian name) all the time I kinda like it, but I don't think I'd want to use it outside of the house, it's a bit funny!!! I call him Vince to OH's family, and mil has taken to calling him Vincey now, which I also occasionally use but don't really like much!!

Anyway, got to take Vince from a dad with a bad back now, catch you all soon!!


Shadow xxxx

 

[Aunty E]

I call Imogen a couple of things - Mog, because it's part of her name and makes me giggle and Grizel as in grizzly Griselda. That's because she doesn't really cry, she just grizzles.

Spent the last couple of days at OH's parents place, which went really pretty well. I kind of just had to hand over the baby with a nice big bottle of expressed milk the first night because they had a bunch of middle aged friends over and after one of them told me off for not supporting my baby's head properly, I decided I couldn't really be in there anymore Into the kitchen with a nice glass of wine for me My MiL is fine really, a bit pushy, but she's trying really hard not to get in my face which I do appreciate. Unlike yours Ruby! I still can't believe how she acted the day Archie was born and now to behave like this, it's gobsmacking. It really is. I don't understand how someone can be that mean and selfish. I hope you're managing to cope with it. Hopefully she'll bitch herself into an early grave.

I couldn't face breastfeeding in front of MiL and FiL (well, MiL did take a picture of me breastfeeding in hospital which made me VERY cross) but I took four feeds with me frozen and fed her morning and last thing at night and nipped off to express a couple of times a day. Worked really well as I could pump super-quick when I was engorged and it meant that Grandma could give her a feed or two. Imogen does seem to feel a bit deprived without boob time though

We went to visit my dad in hospital, he's on a ward full of old people, because most of them have had hip replacements, and I had to take Imogen with me because OH and his parents were going out and I didn't really think it was a problem. Mistake. The minute we got in there a nurse was telling me that she wouldn't bring her baby in here in case she got an infection and within five minutes, the sister asked me to take the baby out. I guess they were only covering their backs but way to make me feel like a pariah. So Mum and I tag-teamed, with one of us walking outside with Imogen while the other chatted to my dad. But I was really annoyed - I'm not stupid, in fact I'm probably more aware of infection risks and the like than most of the nurses given my dad is disabled with a compromised immune system. Imogen wasn't touching anything but me, and I wasn't touching anything on the ward. There really aren't any airborne hospital-acquired infections and if she's got my immune system at the moment, she will never get sick, as I am crazy-healthy. The way they talked to me, you'd think that I was taking her round to be kissed by all the patients and then letting her suck the nurses hands. And breathe. Really hope they move my dad to a hospital that isn't staffed by jobsworthy nazis.

 

[Sam_Star]

RR :- So sorry to hear that your MIL is making you so miserable she sounds like a complete and utter boob! you have every right to feel down hunny you have just had a baby!! And as for insulting you infront of your father well that just shows her for what she really is doesn't it?? - grrrr!!! hun x

Mollyapple :- I know hopw you feel with the constant screaming Dj was exactly the same needless to say they do grow out of it thank heavens xxx

Augustbaby09 :- Poor Mia i hope she gets better soon hun x

Shiv & Cleck :- So glad that Sophia and Emma are over their colds xxx

Shadow :- Im so pleased that life is so settled for you Elinor is trying her best to get into around the same routine but Dj is turning into our wild child and proventing it!!

MJ :- Im so sorry to hear that your dad is in hospital and i am also sorry if my sheer ignorance stopped me saying that sooner xx Imogen seems to be doing well im so pleased! I also have to say that your post was pretty funny i love your sense of humour xx

AFM
Well my sweet angel behaved herself for her Uncle Jay on friday night so i feel so comfortable now knowing that she has a babysitter that she likes!
Friday night was my MIL's 50th birthday party and she got a little druk and declared to the room that i am the best thing thats happened to darren and that she loves me for giving her, her amazing grand daughter!! Now im not sure if you will all remember but a few months ago SHE HATED ME!! Ahhhh well i suppose i cant hold a grudge!!
I had a few drinks myself but wasn't even tipsy and i still woke up with a hangover!!!

 

[jelr]

Hi girls

Thanks a million for all the replies on LO's sleeping routines, sounds like Natasha is the same as every other baby then, which is great to know.

Samstar: glad Elinor is getting into a good routine and that your MIL likes you again lol - I also had a few drinks last night and woke with a hangover today, I think it is probalby our bodies getting used to it again.

AuntyE: Sorry to hear your dad is in hospital and hope he is better soon.

Shadow: Yay for Vince sleeping 12 hours.

Ruby: Sorry to hear you are having so much hassle with your MIL - she sounds like a right crack pot, hope it all eases up soon.

MJ: Hope your HV is better than you started out and happy birthday Adam.

Augustbaby: Hope ruby's cold is better soon.

Shiv and Cleckner: So glad to hear LO's colds are better.

TMR: Hope Lucas starts to sleep during the day for you.

Costgang: lmas at you being up and all organised and it was so early - DH did that once and I laughed so much - at least you werent rushing and behind time like I always am.

Mollyapple: Hope your trips out aren't so eventful in future and that Jorja isn't so fussy while getting ready.

Elly & Mimiso: Thanks for info on sleeping

Well dont have much news girls - went for a meal for my friends birthday last night and then a couple of drinks - but I really hated it, I missed DH and Natasha sooo much and felt like a fish out of water, the pub we went to was full of youngsters and I just felt old and fat and frumpy and just wanted to be home. Think AF is going to make an appearance soon as I was extremely weepy yesterday and even though I was home by 12 and only had a couple of glasses of wine, and didn't have broken sleep as DH did the night feeds, I still woke up with a hangover, guess thats from just being out of practice.

Well we have Natasha's peadiatric appointment tomorrow, so fingers crossed her little heart murmer will be closed.