LTTTC & Assisted Conception Section Guidelines

[magicvw]

i guess the thing with the whole 'finally - bfp' after 6 months ttc is....... TTC is stressful no matter how long it takes and i guess most people think that sex without contraception equals babies... at least i'm sure that's what they said at school I guess when people have friends that fall right away and it takes them 6, 9 or even 12 months - it does feel like finally, you know?

At 6 months i felt like it had been forever and now, well now i'd slap myself round the face if i had to go through that again! I guess we just live and learn

I agree. I long long time ago I posted a thread in ttc asking how long is long... and the answers were really varied. Personally I didn't feel that passing the 12 month mark was particularly significant, whereas some people replied to my thread saying that 3 months was really hard for them. OK it's personal, and for us LTTTCers it is true to say that those who are feeling crap after 3 months shouldn't be feeling crap so early, but is that actually going to stop them feeling crap? I doubt it. Well so much for the emotional side.

I have now been ttc no.2 for something like 17 months now (I don't count the months obsessively and I'm not going to stop mid-post to work it out). I still don't feel the frustration and anger of some of the other ladies in this forum, and as I am ttc no.2, I don't think I ever will. I don't feel very comfortable in this forum, because I DO feel guilty being here with secondary infertility. I don't believe I can really understand the emotions of those going though ivf and similar, and I don't believe they can know what it feels like to think that you're only allowed one and no matter how hard you try you are not going to have another.

I think another added aspect of us 2nd infertility girls is how far we will go on the ttc journey. I won't have IVF - I know I won't, even if it turns out that that is the only option. And I won't adopt. I'm not sure what my limits are, but they are absolutely not the same as they would have been had I still been ttc no.1.

SO I guess what I'm saying is that the forum needs to be divided to a certain extent, because at the moment it is like throwing the lambs in with the lions. This is such an emotive issue and forgive me Wobbles for stirring again I am being selfish on the one hand - because I want there to be a warm, safe place for others like me to feel comfortable posting, and on the other hand I think the primary ltttcers need a place to vent which is not populated by people like me, who might want to mention their kids, previous pregnancies and symptoms and so forth in posts.

OK off the soap box! Slap me Wobbles if I deserve it! xxx

 

[Wobbles]

Good points again regarding secondary infertility ...its hard to see whats best here and how much it will be used. Many with secondary feel the same as those who are trying for #1 with problems or assisted conception ...my understanding was the want of your own family first or extended is both as equally important meaning ifyou face problems its just as heart breaking! Does that make sense how I am thinking.

We have spoke about this but maybe a poll would help to see if we reconsider this again as a sub-forum.

It is hard to come to whats best so please don't think we ignore your opinions or suggestions we take all on board, jiggleem about and see what may work.

x