Major Daycare Change Regret.. Need Help

[HappyWife90]

My son started in daycare at 4 months since my husband and I both work and we have no family in the area. We didn't have much time to research facilities but found a seemingly nice place in a very convenient location. I had small issues with the place - there was definitely a neurotic buzz, frequent passive aggressive comments, things like that. But my son was considerably loved there. About a month ago, I had an interaction with the owner of the place that left me floored. She was so incredibly rude and unprofessional that ultimately we decided to take our business elsewhere. We had a personal referral for an award-winning facility that was a little farther away and a bit more expensive, but the hours and technology were better. After just a few days of being there though, I see that he and we are way more neglected there. I also see that he does not have as much physical space and outside time. I have robbed my child of something WAY better, all because of MY pride and principles. I can't imagine a way to fix the situation or ever forgive myself. There isn't much other game in town daycare-wise. Any help? I am so so devastated.

 

[MindUtopia]

What was it specifically about the old daycare that you were uncomfortable with? Personally, though neither sounds ideal (I would prefer a supportive, nurturing environment where there is positive communication with parents and great outside space), I would not be comfortable anywhere where the communication from staff is inappropriate and they don't seem to have a good handle on managing the children (I take this is what you mean by a neurotic buzz, that there was too much going on that wasn't very organised and well managed). We love our nursery and our daughter has been there for 3 years now, but we looked at another and some of the comments from staff during our visit and tour were really inappropriate and passive aggressive. I never would have sent my daughter into that environment. If they are trying to provide thoughtful, constructive feedback (for instance, on a behavioural issue or a need they felt wasn't being met that they needed your help with), then that's one thing and you were probably not right in not taking that on board and just leaving. But if their comments were truly inappropriate and unprofessional, then that's potentially an indication of the sort of care they are providing and I would feel like you made the right choice. You want somewhere where there will be good, positive, thoughtful communication and lots of engagement with your child and time for exploration and play. You can supplement with your own things outside of work hours, like more outdoors play, etc. I would definitely care more than the environment was right and supportive.

 

[HappyWife90]

Thank you for your thoughtful feedback. Turns out, you are very right! The ladies at the new daycare are so much more genuine and down to earth. I don't feel uncomfortable and judged walking through the hallways, so I'm sure my son feels more comfortable too. Just a really awful freak-out on my part.. oh the mom guilt!