male midwives?

[MrsPear]

Just interested in what people think of male midwives (if any opinion at all) after reading this article. I really couldn't care less if my midwife is male or female. In fact, some idiot male once told me they were a midwife and I didn't bat an eyelid, and he got all offended asking does he really look like a midwife? Well I don't exactly have this clear vision of a midwife in my head so the joke was kind of lost on me.

Someone said to me that they don't really understand why a man would become a midwife. I don't really get that mentality either. Like, my husband is an endoscopist. He spends all day every day doing colonoscopies. I mean, on a superficial level, why would anyone want to do that? But it's not about looking at bottoms and poo, like being a midwife isn't about looking at birth canals. My OH does it because it's a useful job that diagnoses bowel cancer and needs someone who is understanding and skilled and empathetic and knowledgeable and caring and trustworthy, and he is all of those things. I would have thought (hoped) that man or woman, anyone could potentially feel the desire to support women bringing new life into the world and be responsible for guiding and educating them, and helping them, and looking after them, and acting in an emergency, and diagnosing problems for them, and listening to them and so on.

What do other people think? And if you would rather not have a male midwife (I won't judge btw, it is a personal choice- a lot of things in healthcare people do feel that they want to be treated by someone of the same sex and there are also cultural reasons, so even though I don't feel that way I am not judging it) how would you feel with a male obstetrician?

 

[Mummy to be x]

I think male or female, it's an amazing job to do and bringing life into the world is one of the most fabulous things any person could do.

I wouldn't bat an eye lid to having a male as my midwife I'm honest. They're in the job for the same reason female midwives are.

 

[lau86]

As long as they're good at the job I don't mind. It's like when my MIL said to be a teacher you need to have kids!

 

[Luvspnk31]

What's the difference between being a midwife and an OB?? Yes, there are things the OB can do that a midwife can't, but honestly, the baby part is basically the same. In my way of thinking, there's no major difference, so who cares??

 

[RandaPanda]

There's a male midwife at the practice I go to. He's the first one in our province! He's not part of my midwife team (they work with us in pairs) but he is half of my friend's team. She said that she actually prefers him to the female midwife who also works with her, just based on his personality and approach to caring for her and the baby. I think that sort of thing matters far more than the sex of the midwife, and I think it's great that he wants to do a job that is so meaningful! Personally, I prefer to see a female for "private" matters, but I think I could quickly adjust to seeing a male as long as he was compassionate and professional.

 

[Hopefulk]

I think you raise a valid point... Many of my friends have been treated my a male ob, but have also said a male midwife would be weird! It says a lot about our preconceptions and society unfortunately (we expect the man to be the dr and the woman to be the nurse)

 

[emeeorevan]

I live in the US. My OB is male. Most obstetricians I've met here have been males. All of the doctors I've ever had are males. That being said, I have met female doctors but they were not mine.
I've never met a midwife (don't see or hear of them around here) but I've had both male and female nurses take care of me in the hospital.
I personally don't care what gender a person is as long as they know how to do their job and have compassion for their patients.

 

[Mrs Dragonfly]

For me I'd rather see a female for the lower region than males, but that's just a preference. I don't doubt a mans ability to hold a profession in OB or midiwfery. Honestly I think it's amazing that there are male midwives, it's such a labor of love and a true passion and absolutely love than the male culture can be just as nurturing and caring about childbirth as a woman can be.

 

[emeeorevan]

I'm just the opposite. I'd rather see a male as that's the only gender I'm comfortable looking "down there". Its a little weird to me to have a woman looking at something only my husband sees lol! I also feel that women are more judgmental than men. I've had female nurses who had easy deliveries so they think anyone complaining is a wimp. And women (including myself) can be real *itches to each other for no real reason.

 

[kazine]

As long as he wasn't doing any sweeps on me. Awkward.

 

[Luvspnk31]

I've had both male and female OB's , and currently have a female mw. Personally, I don't necessarily have a preference to gender as much as personality. I LOVE my mw, and am a bit sad that this is my last baby. Wish I would have found her with #1. Up til now, I've felt my care was good, but nothing exceptional. I realize mw care in the UK is pretty standard, but here in the US, those of us that choose a mw, it's because we want a more personal level of care than we get with an OB.

 

[Ashersmomma]

I don't have a MW, as they aren't very common in this area, but my OB is male. I had a female OB years ago before I got pregnant. I honestly never really even saw her. I saw her PA most of the time, and her very rarely.
My current OB, I love! He is absolutely wonderful. I see him at every appointment. He doesn't even have a PA, just his nurse that helps out(Love her too!!) Very patient and understanding. Puts up with all my crazy worries and such At first I was nervous about going to a male OB, but at the time I got pregnant I didn't have too many choices. I'm glad now that I chose him! And doesn't hurt that he's easy on the eyes Just don't tell DH I think that.

 

[RaspberryK]

I personally don't like having a male consultant gynae and have in the past paid privately to get the female doctor I wanted.
I've seen male doctors all through this pregnancy for Internal scans etc and whilst I'm uncomfortable I am getting used to it a bit.
I really don't want a male consultant delivering my baby, I know I won't feel at ease and relaxed enough to birth.
Having said all that, I've seen a male student gynae and I think he's wonderful and would have absolutely no issues with him delivering my baby.
I'm not sure how I'd feel about a male midwife, i think their role is very different from a doctor. It would probably dependant on their personality, from experience even the female midwife I'd got to know and been comfortable with being in attendance stalled my labour. Each shift change and each internal slowed my contractions and things only hotted up when we were left alone.
That being said when I turned up at hospital fully dilated I couldn't have given a rats ass what was going on or who was in the room.
But before that point I think I may have been uncomfortable stripped down to only a tankini top or completely naked in the showerr with a male in attendance other than my husband, and definitely after being cleaned up and naked skin to skin breastfeeding for the first time.
Xx

 

[AJCart]

I don't much care your gender as long as you're good at your job.

I had a female OB and female midwives, but had my second dose of gel for induction inserted by a male OB. Didn't phase me, he's just doing his job and I'm sure he's had his hands in enough women to not be phased by me. Haha.

 

[MummyToAmberx]

It really doesnt matter, regardless of what they'd be performing.

All i want is a midwife who listens, is kind and caring and respects my wishes.

Im yet to have got one of them this is my third baby.

 

[Rickles]

The midwife I had with DD was beyond a bitch, (She told me off for swearing, made me push for over 2 hours before begrudgingly getting a doctor, then reprimanded me for speaking to the doctor whilst the dr. stitched me up)... My husband and I were so scared of being called racist if we asked for another one, we took it! But subsequently EVERY healthcare professional who has heard my story is shocked.

So I'd take an alien if they were sympathetic, professional and supported me through labour as opposed to make it the most traumatic experience of my life... man or woman is totally irrelevant once everything gets going. I've seen wonderful examples of both doing the job - hoping I get one of them for this birth!! xx

 

[Breeelizabeth]

I have a male OB and female midwives. Personally I'd feel more comfortable having a female doctor but it's not possible (there are only males in my area). I don't doubt that he will be totally professional when the time comes. I do have the benefit of having the midwives, so they'll be doing internals as opposed to him doing them which will make me more comfortable.

 

[ginny83]

I don't mind if the OBs or midwives I see are male or female, as long as they want to do what's best for me and my baby. When I had DS I had quite a few people rush into the room at one point - couldn't tell if they were male or female and did not care in the slightest!

I've also had internal scans done by both males and females - both pretty awkward!

 

[zilla]

When I hear "male midwife" it always reminds me of that episode of Only Fools and Horses where Racquel is giving birth to Damien and the midwife there is male, Del refuses to let him in the room and Racquel is like "I don't care if he's a trained chimp, get out of his way!!"

I don't see why a male can't be a midwife. Or work as a nurse or any other "female" jobs. Or why a woman can't be a firefighter etc.
On the same point, I hate how genders really get stereotyped, especially early on in life! I've bought DS a toy kitchen for Xmas, and have been trying to find accessories for it - but they're all pink/purple and aimed at girls. Really annoys me!

(sorry for going off on a tangent lol)

 

[ajlj1126]

I hope this doesn't get me in trouble but I actually prefer a male OB. My OB is an older male and I don't know if I could have a woman doing it. I have had female gynecologists in the past and most (not all) of them have been.. sort of unsympathetic to me. I had one woman tell me (when I was in the ER with an unusually heavy AF/pain) that ALL women go through this and it's not an emergency, and she said I was being "over-dramatic." (turned out I had PCOS!) I've found that males sympathize more when I tell them something, maybe because they DON'T know how it feels and they take it more seriously? I don't know. But the best OB's or GYN's I've seen have been males. And I can't say enough about my OB who is absolutely amazing at what he does and you can just tell he is meant to be doing this kind of work.