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maybe soon :D

lexis_mommy

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hi i may be joining all of you soon....i'm thinking on leaving my bf when i start maternity leave (around the middle of this month) i'm waiting till then because i will be moving to my moms and she lives a few towns over and i wouldn't have a way to work...so best to stick it out a couple more weeks until then, then i can start with a clean slate :D

the only shitty thing is i go on maternity leave 3 days after our 2 year anniversary so i think i might end up chickening out :? ahhh i don't know i'm so stressed with him, but leaving him seems to be even more stressful...plus, despite everything...i love him...what can i tell my heart to stop loving him??? agh... sorry lol i needed to go on for a minute :D

if anyone can give me any advice on getting out ON MY OWN lol (cuz i have only ever shared places with other people) i would greatly appreciate it... my mom says i can stay with her as long as i want but i haven't lived with her since i was 15, and i would feel weird moving back in at 18, almost 19, with 2 babies and a dog...i need my own space :D thanks :D
 
Oh hunny - Would I be out of line asking you why you are considering a split from your OH?
 
hi, no not at all... its a long story so i'll shorten it...basically i think hes not quite cheating on me, but on the way there IYSWIM.... like this girl is on his msn now (she lives in the same town as us, and is a BIG whore (i try not to judge people because i wasn't an angel myself, but her "specialty" is guys who are in relationships, and to me thats whorish), anyways so i went on his msn pretending to be him and didn't get much except she said "did you get in shit with your gf" and "erase all the messages" (i never had it to save the messages so that didn't help me)

so i asked him about and hes deny deny deny...which is making me more mad because i feel like he thinks i'm stupid, and then this other girl is on his msn (the first girls friend) and i talked to her to and tommy said he doesn't even KNOW her, yet she knows my name and shit... :? so i duno i just feel like he's lying to me and everything... but then maybe i'm just over reacting? but i dont think so because if he just told me that he talked to them and flirted or w/e a bit then i wouldn't care, (well i would but) just the fact that he's lying to me and i feel like hes treating me like i'm stupid... i duno lol

so much for this being the short version lmao sorry :D
and its probably just all talk on my end because sad as it is i will probably stay with him because despite the time we spend talking about this, we have been getting along really great the past couple weeks so i duno..so confused :roll: xxx

men should be outlawed i think ... a prohibition like they had with liquor back in the day :D
 
follow ur heart i hope ur mum is a great support it will be hard but u will do it you sound like a strong woman if u can make the break from bf on ur owe b4 ur matery leave good luck
 
thanks... i hope you guys don't think i'm being flippant (i think thats the word i'm thinking of) its just that i have cried so much and stressed so much about it all i just feel like laughing about it (not REALLY laughing...but) is the best way for me to get through it without completely losing my head...i still don't know what to do, we have been getting along fairly well, so i don't know...even if i don't leave him right when i start my maternity, i think it will be better knowing that i CAN and don't have to worry about rushing back to work and all that junk....bleh i have no idea lol thanks for letting me get off steam tho :D:D xxx
 
Hi hun,

Just go with your gut feeling hun and do what you feel is best for you and your kiddies.....

If you are not ready to do it now, you may decide to do it in a year or 2 or whenever, but whenever or if ever it comes, if you really feel you need to do it then you will find the strength babe. So just go with how you feel hun, you will be able to do anything if you feel you need to.

Good luck hun x
 
thanks :D you guys are great :D:D what would i do without you?? lol call up the operator or something and ramble on to her i bet :D still not sure what the hell to do...seems everyday more and more stuff is coming up...bleh so sick of feeling like shit all the time :cry: thanks for listening and giving me advice tho :D xxx
 

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